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amother


OP
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Fri, Jun 10 2022, 4:40 am
I run a playgroup from home.
I'm going to be away for 3 days so I've arranged for the kids to go to my assistants house for those days.
They know her well, they know the kids. They don't know her house...
It was a big organisation still, I gave her craft supplies, some more toys etc.
If I'd asked the mothers if it's ok before telling them then I would've had to have it at my house and I couldn't find an assistant that the kids know to be here early enough so this made the most sense.
One mother is really unhappy, she said it should be the parents decision, her son might be very unsettled etc.
I told her that it's too late to arrange anything else at this point but if she prefers, she can just not send him these 3 days, and not to pay me.she doesn't work at the moment, I have other mothers who work so it wasn't an option to start later at my house.
She said she'll get back to me. In the meantime do any of you think that I've handled this ok or not? Thanks
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momaleh


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Fri, Jun 10 2022, 4:53 am
No you should not have consulted with them first. These arrangements sound very reasonable, and make sure you give them enough advance notice and a few reminders. Not sure how long before you told them.
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Simple1


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Fri, Jun 10 2022, 5:09 am
amother [ Sand ] wrote: | Yes, that's my experience. It makes more sense anyway with everything set up already and all the stuff needed. It sounds like way more of a hassle to move things for a day to the assistants home where it's not set up properly for the playgroup and not even be childproof. If I was the assistant I'd be annoyed and definitely expecting to be paid extra. Plus it's not really fair to the kids, it's not the same experience at all. |
It seems like that's the arrangement the assistant preferred.
I don't know what consulting them would help unless you had other choices. Some people are complainers, but like mentioned above maybe because they are going through something stressful.
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naomi2


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Fri, Jun 10 2022, 5:16 am
You did fine, the arrangements sound very reasonable.
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amother


Brunette
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Fri, Jun 10 2022, 5:19 am
I actually happen to disagree having done playgroup and being a mother. In no way is it acceptable to just change without giving parents notice. Permission? No, I don’t think so, but ample notice with a note saying you have obviously been etc. I completely disagree that you could have left them “high and dry” as someone suggested. Have the parents had a chance to see her place or is it just you’ll see on the day? Is it child proof? Is there enough space? Is it within reasonable distance? I’m not just sending my child, I don’t know the environment or it’s safety etc. If you’ve been there and assessed the place as appropriate then fine, but I can still understand parents who will not find this arrangement acceptable. No one is right or wrong here, and you absolutely did the right thing by offering not to send with a refund for those days. I wouldn’t take it personally, and if indeed it is a suitable place within reasonable distance, the mother doesn’t need to be making a huge fuss, but it is what it is.
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amother


Petunia
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Fri, Jun 10 2022, 5:42 am
amother [ Brunette ] wrote: | I actually happen to disagree having done playgroup and being a mother. In no way is it acceptable to just change without giving parents notice. Permission? No, I don’t think so, but ample notice with a note saying you have obviously been etc. I completely disagree that you could have left them “high and dry” as someone suggested. Have the parents had a chance to see her place or is it just you’ll see on the day? Is it child proof? Is there enough space? Is it within reasonable distance? I’m not just sending my child, I don’t know the environment or it’s safety etc. If you’ve been there and assessed the place as appropriate then fine, but I can still understand parents who will not find this arrangement acceptable. No one is right or wrong here, and you absolutely did the right thing by offering not to send with a refund for those days. I wouldn’t take it personally, and if indeed it is a suitable place within reasonable distance, the mother doesn’t need to be making a huge fuss, but it is what it is. |
This! It is reasonable to take time off and make accommodations for it, but it is the kids' needs that needs to be prioritized and not OPs or the assistant's preferences. I recall such a previous arrangement for my kid and was horrified when I want to drop off my kid. The substitute lived in a small apartment, and the kids were to stay in a tiny cramped room for the entire day.
What needs to be done here once alternate arrangements are set up is to inform the parents that all safety, environmental and other concerns have been met. Such as, 'I have ensured the environment is child proof, there's ample living space for the kids to be in, etc."
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