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I’m at my wits end… homesick DD
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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Jun 21 2022, 9:45 pm
I just wanted to take the time and let you all know how much your input has helped me. I wish I can answer each and every one of you separately. I keep rereading the helpful replies. Shared them with dh as well. We will most likely keep her home after I give birth iyh.

I realize I have a few things I need to work on:

1. Consistently showing up for her. Mentally, physically & emotionally. Being present.
2. She needs discipline and for me to be firm with her
3. This is last but the hardest. I need to take concrete steps to protect her from her father. I don’t know how to tho. He’s not stable and takes her on a roller coaster.

This is so so hard for me. I didn’t grow up with a mother that showed up. This is so new to me. I feel uncomfortable and like I want to run away. It’s foreign.

Tonight, I gave her extra special attention. I drew her a bubble bath, washed her hair for her and played some games. I guess that’s normal but wasn’t for me.

I went to get her roller blades and she threw a tantrum that she wants a toy as well. All I wanted to do was shout at her and demand appreciation for the $80 blades. I just kept calm and stuck to my no. It would’ve been much easier to give in.
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amother




OP
 

Post Tue, Jun 21 2022, 9:45 pm
Now I just need tons and tons of energy and strength. I don’t know where I’ll get it from.
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amother




Marigold
 

Post Wed, Jun 22 2022, 11:19 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I just wanted to take the time and let you all know how much your input has helped me. I wish I can answer each and every one of you separately. I keep rereading the helpful replies. Shared them with dh as well. We will most likely keep her home after I give birth iyh.

I realize I have a few things I need to work on:

1. Consistently showing up for her. Mentally, physically & emotionally. Being present.
2. She needs discipline and for me to be firm with her
3. This is last but the hardest. I need to take concrete steps to protect her from her father. I don’t know how to tho. He’s not stable and takes her on a roller coaster.

This is so so hard for me. I didn’t grow up with a mother that showed up. This is so new to me. I feel uncomfortable and like I want to run away. It’s foreign.

Tonight, I gave her extra special attention. I drew her a bubble bath, washed her hair for her and played some games. I guess that’s normal but wasn’t for me.

I went to get her roller blades and she threw a tantrum that she wants a toy as well. All I wanted to do was shout at her and demand appreciation for the $80 blades. I just kept calm and stuck to my no. It would’ve been much easier to give in.


You sound like a great mom!!

Total different situation but I kept my 2 year old with me by my mom when I gave birth (my family x helped much with the kids, was more for company and food). It was the best decision ever cuz she x felt like we abandoned her etc… and I x had the hard transition when she came home. Also it’s easier to transition when you have more help and help is usually mainly offered in the first 2 weeks or so. Like suppers, play dates etc..

Good luck, and iyh bsha’a Tova umutzlachas.
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