Can’t buy food gas tuition Lakewood

amother

Amaryllis

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 8:10 am

I just want to chime in that we were able to stretch the food box for the whole week. I didn’t go into a grocery all week because everything is beyond expensive. We bH managed!
The only place I went to was a wholesale produce store and got a lot of vegetables for much cheaper.
I never ever imagined it would come to a situation like this that I open the fridge and say, what can I make out of our ingredients? I used to always plan my menu while shopping in the store.
It’s scary times.

benny

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 8:40 am

The food boxes are helping me tremendously! Especially since kids aren’t in camp so I can take for everyone.

Regarding the post above about this being the nisayon… we work on our emunah every day that parnassah is from hashem and HIm alone. We used to have a very difficult time taking help. But then we changed the way we think and decided maybe the help being offered IS HASHEM sending us the help we are asking for! Of course it feels better to get money from a successful business or job. But it’s the same
Money coming to us from other people and maybe THAT hardship is the nisayon. So now we accept graciously and we thank hashem for it.

amother

Clover

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 8:50 am

amother [ Amaryllis ] wrote:

Can I ask what's in your box? I'm in Brooklyn. I see it as a bonus. I probably saved $20-30 but it's not a replacement.

4g01o

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 9:08 am

amother [ Impatiens ] wrote:

OP my soul hurts and I feel you on a deep level because we are in the same boat.
DH works 85 hours a week
I work 50 and we’re still not making it.
We already let our cleaning lady go a few weeks ago.
Our car is about to be picked up
Our mortgage is behind 6 months
We have a shut off notice for our gas and electric
We still owe tuition from last school year
My kids are home from camp because we can’t afford it.
Our bank accounts is at 0
Our cc’s are maxed.
Our pantry is empty
Our fridge is empty (today the kids had homemade pizza “again” for dinner and my son wanted eggs but we didn’t even have any😪)
We also don’t have how to make shabbes yet but I know Hashem is right here with me, crying along and we have to trust that he knows what he is doing and even if we can’t see the reasons why this is happening I know something amazing is coming in the near future. Sending you hugs

Something is wrong with how America is run! You're working so hard, it's crazy Sad

Really feel for you. Hugs

Where is the money going to that you and dh are making? If you work that hard you should have something?

Last edited by 4g01o on Fri, Jul 29 2022, 9:56 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Tulip

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 9:54 am

This thread is so sad and so heartwarming at the same time. It's so sad that so many people are working incredibly hard and still suffering. And heartwarming that there are so many baalei chesed in klal yisroel. Just a personal note: A few imamothers offered to help others before Pesach and I took them up on the offer. It was so much appreciated and so useful. It also really helped with my feelings of loneliness and isolation-like I know klal yisroel has my back.

Aside from the money imamothers sent me, we really needed more. My DH is also very proud, like many of the DH's here. He did not want to take money.

We went to speak to our Rav and told him about our situation. I explained to him that DH doesn't want to take money. He said very directly "Your job is to support your wife and family. And if your income isn't enough to do that, you are MECHUYAV to take tzedakah." He then gave us a very generous donation. With a psak like that, there wasn't much DH could do except take the money.

Don't be embarrassed to get your Rav involved! They want to help and they will to the best of their abilities.

amother

Impatiens

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 11:24 am

Fab4 wrote:

Something is wrong with how America is run! You're working so hard, it's crazy Sad

Really feel for you. Hugs

Where is the money going to that you and dh are making? If you work that hard you should have something?

When Covid started we had both lost our jobs and we took our loans from a few gemachim just so we can stay afloat now all our money has to go back for the loans we took out otherwise they rightfully so run after us. We also use our income to pay minimum payments for some credit cards so we can at least Have the little bit we do have for gas/food But it’s a never ending hamster wheel.

4g01o

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 11:26 am

amother [ Impatiens ] wrote:

I'm so sorry to hear that.
So hard. IyH you'll have an easier time very soon. Please Hashem!

amother

Impatiens

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 11:36 am

amother [ Powderblue ] wrote:

I hear you. But maybe the nisayon is to take from other people? Could you discuss that with him?

It's like the old mashal of a man in a flood. He climbs a tree and says "Hashem, I know you'll save me." A boat comes along and he says "No, no, Hashem is going to save me." A helicopter throws him a rope and he says "Hashem will save me."
When he gets to shamayim, Hashem asks him, why did you commit suicide? He says "what do you mean? I was waiting for Hashem to save me." and Hashem says "I sent you a boat. I sent you a helicopter. What were you waiting for?"

It's a horrible position but I've learnt that sometimes the challenge is to humble ourselves to take from others.

Wow thank you so much for this! You are right maybe it is our nisayon to be on the receiving end it’s just so hard.
I also have a hard time PM’ing people who are so generous because I don’t want to put myself out there in case you’re a family member? We’re keeping our situation very hush hush and I’d feel extremely embarrassed if I pm someone and that person knows
Me irl.

amother

Ginger

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 12:35 pm

Im gagging of disgust that with all the excess spending on designer clothing and other outrageously expensive disposable luxuries theres even ONE hungry adult or child in Lakewood!

There should be one Rov coordinating a solution to this 24/7.

A Rov died recently (Im not sure of his name) and he wouldnt have allowed one person to be hungry!

Who will step into his shoes?

amother

Amber

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 12:47 pm

amother [ Ginger ] wrote:

Another idea, possibly theres a way that the admin of Imamother, who it seems from all the blinking advertisements is doing nicely, can set up a permanent way with donors who would donate, going forward, to help all those people who reach out to them, when they are really struggling.

Agreed. I don't feel comfortable sharing my sn and then using zelle which shows my real name. But if there were a general imamother fund, I would absolutely happily donate!

oneofakind

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 12:52 pm

Paying minimum on credit cards is a really bad idea because the interest accumulates and then it is truly impossible to get out of that hole. There are credit consolidation companies and Mesila. I'd suggest speaking to both.

Miriams

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 2:36 pm

amother [ Impatiens ] wrote:

Please please get in touch with mesila so they can help u get out of this cycle.
Paying minimum on credit card only makes the situation worse, and makes it drag in for years unnecessarily.
Please please don’t try to do this yourself. These professionals know how to help- they do it all day. Please get help for yourself- but also so your kids don’t have to go through this.

Lego80

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 3:53 pm

amother [ Razzmatazz ] wrote:

Honestly most organizers are begging people to take boxes. I heard over 400 were thrown out yesterday.

There’s also WhatsApp groups for people giving away food from the boxes that they don’t want.

It depends where OP lives. She might be in an area like me (OOT but not SO out of town) where food boxes stopped months ago.

amother

Lawngreen

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 3:57 pm

amother [ Turquoise ] wrote:

3 kosher foodbanks in Lakewood:

Braude 4707983701 send a text that you woukd like to be added . On 14th between Monmouth and Princeton. You'll get a text when he has food to give out. You can also go every Friday an hour and a half before shabbos. They usually have challos, prepared food, vegetables and fruits sometimes.

Englard corner of 14th street and Forest Ave has every night between 8.30 and 9.30 youll get as much bread and bagels as you need (as well as leftover foods from schools/camp and shloimy's) they also have a bigger distribution on Friday afternoon.

Tuesday night on swathmore Ave food distribution at 8pm. Sometimes worth it sometimes not so much. (Cereals, pasta, Peanut butter, eggs,sometimes fruits and vegetables)
If you live south of the lake there's a erev shabbos distribution there also but I dk the address.

Do you have a different number for Braude? This didn’t work

amother

Eggshell

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 4:46 pm

amother [ Ginger ] wrote:

You mean like socialism? Lol

amother

Turquoise

Fri, Jul 29 2022, 4:52 pm

amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote:

Do you have a different number for Braude? This didn’t work

That's the right number. He usually doesn't send texts on erev shabbos or might just be busy!
He doesn't send texts everyday either. It's very random (but very helpful!)
Truthfully you can only benefit during the week if you don't live too far and can get there right away because things get taken very quickly. Occasionally they get a few boxes of random groceries that stores get rid of.