Should we send to the school ...

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children

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amother

NeonGreen

Fri, Aug 05 2022, 2:49 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Thanks everyone. I'm a little nervous but I think we will let them know we are gana send there and daven she makes good friends and it's a good fit for her. She's 4th grade.

You sound like an awesome mother. Schools are a nightmare. I moved last year (ironically out of Lakewood) and when we got a place we took it with both hands even though it wasn’t what we wanted. I was concerned the hanhala was too frum/chasidish for us and that the school was not up to educational par. It’s a year later my son is doing wonderful there bh. He made tons of friends, gained confidence, learned so much! it is a bit too chasidish for us - I won’t lie- but the chol department is excellent and he’s doing ok in Kodesh too. Sometimes, Hashem knows better then us Wink

Wishing you much hatzlocha on your move!

amother

Chicory

Fri, Aug 05 2022, 6:47 am

amother [ Lemon ] wrote:

We may be in the same school. My daughter is in a great school and we are one of the very few chasidish families there. We wanted this. I went to a bais yaakov and wanted the same for her. Not a specific heimish / chasidish…..She’s no different from her friends minus her fathers levush on shabbos and havara. We couldn’t be happier. If your family values line up with the parent body and you like the school then I don’t think chasidish vs not should stop you.

Which school? Is there still a chance of getting in?
how many girls in a class?

amother

Chicory

Fri, Aug 05 2022, 12:35 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Thanks everyone. I'm a little nervous but I think we will let them know we are gana send there and daven she makes good friends and it's a good fit for her. She's 4th grade.

Hatzlocha!!! It should all go smoothly for her !!
Can you share how to get in touch with the vaad? Do you need connections/pull for that also?

amother

Chicory

Fri, Aug 05 2022, 12:40 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Thanks everyone. I'm a little nervous but I think we will let them know we are gana send there and daven she makes good friends and it's a good fit for her. She's 4th grade.

Hatzlocha!!! It should all go smoothly for her !!
Can you share how to get in touch with the vaad? Do you need connections/pull for that also?

amother

Bellflower

Fri, Aug 05 2022, 12:44 pm

I grew up in Lakewood and while there were almost no chassidish families in Lakewood back then, we had a large group of Sephardim and no one thought twice. Maybe I’m being naive about what the schools are like now. But if the hashkafa more or less matches yours, and I guess if you’re not super chassidish, I’d be surprised if it’s an issue. My daughter goes to one of the more left leaning schools in Lakewood and has girls in her class whose fathers wear streimels. Granted they don’t look chassidish in any other way, but my point is that the girls really couldn’t care less.

Chayalle

Fri, Aug 05 2022, 1:36 pm

amother [ Bellflower ] wrote:

I agree with this, and also would add that as a parent, I appreciate the diversity. I have never wanted to send my DD's to a super-boxy school. I feel that a certain mix is a healthy way to grow up. One of my DD's best friends is Sephardi, and they gain so much from their friendship, including an interest and appreciation for each other's differences.

amother

Carnation

Fri, Aug 05 2022, 3:06 pm

amother [ Lemon ] wrote:

My daughter is in Bais Faiga and her friend is from a chassidish family. Her mother said the same thing you did. She seems very happy BH. But Bais Faiga does have more of a mix in general. There are some schools in Lakewood that are very one type only and maybe with one of those schools it would be different.

amother

Dodgerblue

Fri, Aug 05 2022, 5:07 pm

amother [ Aconite ] wrote:

My daughter is one of maybe five students in a school whose fathers wear shtreimlech. We actually sent there by choice because it’s a great school. I don’t see how much being in a chassidish school matters for a girl. I can understand a boy with curly payis feeling different but the girls all look the same.

My friend had this. And since she went to non chasidush elementary school she went to that type of high school. Last year she was the only girl in her grade that didn’t go to seminary because it is not her family minhag and she was miserable. She is now engaged to a boy without a streimel because that’s what she wanted. She’s a good frum girl but has no interest in being chassidush. But again she also had no choice but to put her daughter into the one school that accepted her. It was a great school and after that she put her other girls into that sand school and basically her home just became less chasidush.

amother

Lemon

Fri, Aug 05 2022, 5:11 pm

I went to a very yeshivish Brooklyn school growing up and was the only girl from a chasidish home. My parents sent me there cuz of the values and clientele and school itself. Being chasidish was something I always took pride in. That aspect of my life wasn’t lessened cuz of school friends. Schools isn’t the only influence on a persons lifestyle and future. Family influence is huge!! I got the best of both worlds. Now 10 years later I’m doing the same with my daughters.

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