Need financial help!

amother

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 9:01 am

amother [ Slategray ] wrote:

BeH he's hard to reach but an excellent resource for advice, guidance and can direct to different contacts he has.

Yes as a poster wrote best to have had a good connection with a shul - but even if you haven't try to get in touch with a Rav nearby... they are there to help and askanim the Rav can reach out to on your behalf (for financial)...

We're here for you please let us know how you're doing in a week - generally takes time...

Yes I will chime in again to thank you all and let you know if something works out so others can benefit too...

amother

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 9:02 am

amother [ Viola ] wrote:

I used to work for a landlord and quite a few times we received lump sum payments for past due rent. They were given by various charities but arranged by JCCRP.

This was a few years ago so I am not sure if they still have this program but worth it to give them a try.

Jccrp.org

Wow! Sounds amazing. I'm going to check it out...thank you!

mfb

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 9:12 am

naturalmom5 wrote:

This about covers it
I was going to say this. Maybe not quite so harsh

But yes, OP the protocol on this site is you PM Yael and she vetts you to see if you qualify to post a link to a GFM or Cheseffund page

Just by agreeing to an anonymous poster (anonymous for no reason, only to bash) that is bashing someone is being harsh. And all I’m reading is how op says she’s contacting all the leads but asking if anyone has more leads.

amother

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 9:14 am

mfb wrote:

Appreciating all the validation! Thank you!

amother

Powderblue

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 9:24 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Thanks for your support! All true... I believe had I been a bit more vulnerable and sensitive, I wouldn't post on Imamother again so quickly. People really have to think twice before posting a negative comment.

I'm impressed with how strong you are. It sounds like you've been through a lot and you just keep going. Plenty of people have left here after such nasty comments.

Hopefully some of the helpful responses will bring you some much needed help.

amother

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 9:31 am

amother [ Powderblue ] wrote:

Thank you. Yes, I've been through a lot and going strong! Had I gotten this comment a while ago, I probably would've cried and not posted on Imamother again. As a rule in general, Ima's should err on the side of caution. It takes courage posting for help.

watergirl

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 9:33 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I'll try Rabbi Goldwasser. Thanks.

I bh get most therapy costs covered through insurance. What people don't realize is that there's so much more than just therapy costs. And I also need to provide for myself and my other children singlehandedly. There's got to be something out there to fund more than just therapy. I wish there was...

I read the entire thread but as a former single mother, I wanted to address this.

Please contact legal aid and tell them you are not getting any support from the father of your children. He can not get away with not paying child support, and you can take him to court to force him to pay.

amother

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 9:37 am

watergirl wrote:

I actually am in court already for more than just child support. Hopefully I won't have to wait for child support much longer. But I've been thinking so for a year already... He actually was ordered to give me alimony a long time ago, but he isn't following orders. Thanks for pointing it out though...

mfb

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 10:14 am

amother [ Gold ] wrote:

Op it doesn't sound like you are looking for resources. It sounds like you want imas to give you money or pay your rent for you.

Pretty much everyone here who has offered you "advice" has actually given you a resource to help with one or more specific expenses. But you don't want them. You don't want those resources, you say you're aware of them or give a reason why it's not helpful or won't work for you.

So just open a gofundme page and ask Yael if you can link it here, and ask directly, "I'm not managing financially, I don't think I need guidance or resources because I already know it all and have explored all the resources, I get my kid's therapy through insurance, I don't belong to a shul that I can ask $$ from, and I'm not open to stuff like Dave Ramsey or financial management because I'm managing fine, I just don't make ends meet yet. I already took another job and don't want to take a third or find something higher earning. Please just give me some money to pay off my credit card debt and make ends meet for the next few months at least. Thanks."

It's kind of insulting to everyone trying to help when you post saying that you want direction and guidance and then reject every post other than the one offering a direct donation.

"Resources" and "contacts" are not synonyms for "philanthropist who would be willing to offer me a pot of gold." It's misleading.

Kind of horrible to attack someone as AMOTHER!!
And against site rules to use amother when there is no private or identifying information in your post! So actually you are in the wrong here not op.
Any op can decide which advice to take and doesn’t have to do things as YOU feel she should!

watergirl

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 10:16 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

IYH you will be matzliach in court and he will have to pay arrears also!

amother

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 10:29 am

watergirl wrote:

IYH you will be matzliach in court and he will have to pay arrears also!

That's my biggest wish! Amen!!

amother

Bronze

Wed, Aug 10 2022, 11:17 pm

amother [ Gold ] wrote:

Why would you post this?
If you were actually worried OP is lying and just trying to take all our money than you should’ve pm’d Yael instead of typing out this long message.
Why would you post this knowing that there’s even a 1% chance that OP isn’t lying and she’s actually desperate and in an unfortunate situation? I honestly cannot understand.

A while ago I posted about a personal situation I was dealing with. It was truly heartbreaking and torture. At one point a few imas offered to help me out financially (which wasn’t the main issue I opened the thread about but it made everything SO MUCH worse) and when one person offered to open a go fund me page so that everyone can donate there someone else decided to make sure that everyone knows that it’s possible I’m just making it all up so that I get money.
I promise every single detail I wrote in that thread was true (maybe I changed my kids gender?) It was that insane that it could’ve sounded made up. How sad is that?!
As I said money wasn’t even the issue I started the thread but I can assure you it would help me a lot. The money and even just knowing that random people somewhat care about my suffering without even knowing who I am. No one in real life knew what was going on and it wasn’t the type of thing I could share and I don’t have many people who would care anyway.
I didn’t get any money and it really hurt. People were willing to help me at least in this area but after that warning it scared them off. I was too vulnerable to reach out to Yael to verify me but I wished she reached out to me.
After that original thread my financial situation just got worse and worse and it was so upsetting to think that she could’ve just reached out to yael instead or posting it on the thread.
Obviously it wasn’t bashert and B”H I’m in a much better financially situation now but it caused additional pain to my already really painful situation.

No one is asking you to offer your money, everyone knows this is the internet and we can’t know if what we’re reading is true. If your still concerned reach out to yael.
I hope you don’t want to prevent people from helping her out if OP is saying the truth and I definitely don’t think you would want to cause her more pain by telling her you don’t believe her.
Please think about how your words can affect others before you click on submit.

amother

Thu, Aug 11 2022, 2:28 am

amother [ Bronze ] wrote:

Sorry for what happened to you. I sometimes cringe when I read threads and see others insensitive comments. But this time I actually felt it on my own bones and it felt horrible. Maybe Yael should have a rule about putting others down in threads, like 3 strikes and you're out...

notshanarishona

Thu, Aug 11 2022, 8:00 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Do you find their fees and interest rates are the same as credit cards or more hidden fees that I wouldn't be aware of?

Similar, I just borrowed $7500 and we paid $8200 to return that over 6 months. But it’s not like a late payment because we set things up that way to borrow and replay over 24 weeks

amother

Slategray

Thu, Aug 11 2022, 8:07 am

Might be easier to settle the cc debt thru a they're always advertising about that option... not sure if that makes sense to you..example instead of 20,000 turns into repayment of 3,000

amother

Thu, Aug 11 2022, 10:55 am

amother [ Slategray ] wrote:

Might be easier to settle the cc debt thru a they're always advertising about that option... not sure if that makes sense to you..example instead of 20,000 turns into repayment of 3,000

Seems like part of your post got cut off. What were you recommending?

amother

Thu, Aug 11 2022, 10:55 am

notshanarishona wrote:

Similar, I just borrowed $7500 and we paid $8200 to return that over 6 months. But it’s not like a late payment because we set things up that way to borrow and replay over 24 weeks

I'll look into it. Thanks!

amother

Slategray

Thu, Aug 11 2022, 9:26 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Seems like part of your post got cut off. What were you recommending?

They might be able to help you settle if ur interested
https://angelsofdebt.com/

amother

Thu, Aug 11 2022, 9:34 pm

amother [ Slategray ] wrote:

They might be able to help you settle if ur interested
https://angelsofdebt.com/

I'll check it out. Thanks!

amother

Thu, Aug 11 2022, 9:40 pm

amother [ Slategray ] wrote:

They might be able to help you settle if ur interested
https://angelsofdebt.com/

I just emailed them. Online there's so much advertised. Wonder if you have personal experience with them?