Playgroup mother is being ridiculous!

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Forum -> Working Women -> Work at Home Mothers

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NotInNJMommy

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:17 am

It's probably not worth a "fight" right now, but I would say if they pay a flat rate for a place (not per diem drop in) and you have a sick policy etc like a typical daycare, that situations that arise due to routine preclusions that are enforced consistently do not result in any refund, etc.

I think if your initial diagnosis for your child was that it wasn't contagious, you did nothing wrong. Once you found out it was HFM rash, then, preclusion should have taken effect and children allowed back when there's a note from the dr about when they can return (or in your case, when you could resume care). If, especially in the cases of rashes (other than diaper rash), it's expected parents take the child to the the dr and get the dr to sign off on what it is and when they can return, then it's not on you. You've done your due diligence to keep your group as healthy as possible--but also, as a mother who has been through this, daycare/groups with young kids will just spread stuff even with everyone trying their best. And yes, even enforcing preclusions with HFM still don't prevent all or most cases from spreading. I'm not sure where you are, but NYS DOH for example has recommendations/policies for how to treat different things as far as daycares, schools, preclusions, etc.

I know if everyone is doing their due diligence that it's expected there will be payments for care not provided as a result at times.

amother

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:17 am

amother Tangerine wrote:

They might. Unknowlingly. BUnknowingly. Child has chicken pox, they should absolutely NOT knowingly come to playgroup.
If the morahs child has chicken pox, she should absolutely NOT knowlingly expose the other children. She should make other arrangements to make sure the childcare is covered, either for her child or for the rest of the children in her care.

When my baby comes out with chicken pox I plan to tell all the parents as soon as I know, but I'd stay open because those who've kids had it will still want to send.

It's already contagious before the spots come out and I'm talking about 2 year olds here not newborns so most, if not all parents would keep their children in. If 1 wouldn't then I wouldn't charge them BUT if they came out with it then they'd have to pay for missed sick days, those are the 'rules'

I didn't cause my baby to get these things and pass them on. These things happen!

NotInNJMommy

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:19 am

amother OP wrote:

I think you will be in a tough spot if preclusions/prevention aren't applied also to your child(ren) who attend. It may not be reasonable to enforce others keeping sick kids home and therefore having a policy of no refunds in that case. Something to think about.

ETA: I know any which way, there will be frustrated parents. Try not to take it personally.

amother

Narcissus

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:21 am

Where I live if the morah is sick or her child is sick she gets a sub. If that’s not going to be the case she needs to tell the parents before they sign up. I do not send to playgroups where the Morah won’t find a sub for these days

amother

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:21 am

amother Tangerine wrote:

If you have a home business, you have to think about this in advance.
What will you do if your own child is sick?

The answer is not to expose the other children to your sick child, the answer is to have backup arrangements for this scenario.

I've been doing this for years, through a few kids and no one has blamed me, or my baby for their child being sick.

And they all get to send their kids in when they're sick 'with just a cold' and give it to my baby? It goes both ways.

NotInNJMommy

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:23 am

amother Narcissus wrote:

I agree after being up front and transparent about whether or not you have a sub or can get one, trying to have that option available will probably help with your client base and keeping stable financial operations.

amother

Tangerine

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:23 am

amother OP wrote:

Of course you didn't cause your baby to get these things, but these things happen! And you need to be prepared!
Not by staying open and exposing children further.
You should have a backup plan.
If you dont,
It's perfectly reasonable for a parent to consider it as if your closed. Because your not open in a reasonable, safe manner.

Again, I've dealt with this situation with Hand foot mouth, strep, RSV etc.

NotInNJMommy

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:23 am

amother OP wrote:

The thing is, "just a cold" is not the same as HFM or chicken pox, and the expectations are different as far as preclusion and prevention.

watergirl

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:25 am

amother OP wrote:

These things happen only if you are not taking precautions. Chickenpox is a poor example and I am not willing to get into a vaccine debate but there today, if the average child gets chickenpox, it means precautions were not taken. Still, fever accompanies chickenpox and kids are really uncomfortable when they have it - they need to be home once the parent knows their child has it.

It is very clear you do not have a sick policy in place. Children can not come to daycare with fever, a contagious virus, etc. I have no idea how it is you run a daycare without a sick policy, but this is why you are dealing with a "ridiculous" mother. You asked for it when you opened and have no policy in place.

amother

Tangerine

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:26 am

amother OP wrote:

I'm not blaming you for your child getting sick!!
I'm blaming you for not making other arrangements such as a backup, (or being upfront with parents as another poster wrote, that I'd your child is sick, you are staying open and they can choose whether ot not to send, but you will not be having a sub)

No, they don't get to send their kid when their sick! As another poster wrote, you have a policy you discuss with your pediatrician. Fever, green runny nose discharge, are nonos.

It goes both ways ,key word both ways.

EtA I had to keep my kid home forn weeks ith rsv when he caught it at playgroup and 75% of the class was forced to stay home

amother

Narcissus

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:27 am

amother OP wrote:

Where I live there are policies. No fever for 24 hours. Etc

amother

Peach

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:29 am

OP children with hand foot and mouth are allowed to go to school still, unless they feel unwell. Carrying on the playgroup with your baby having it is absolutely fine

amother

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:30 am

amother Peach wrote:

OP children with hand foot and mouth are allowed to go to school still, unless they feel unwell. Carrying on the playgroup with your baby having it is absolutely fine

How do you know this?
It's definitely not a dangerous virus. Unpleasant yes, but not serious.

amother

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:32 am

amother Narcissus wrote:

Where I live there are policies. No fever for 24 hours. Etc

We have that for schools but not for small privately run playgroups unless they're ofsted registered.

amother

Peach

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:33 am

Look it up in NHS children with hand foot and mouth dont have to isolate like chicken pox, they can go to school like normal even though it's so contagious

amother

Tangerine

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:34 am

amother OP wrote:

We have that for schools but not for small privately run playgroups unless they're ofsted registered.

Does it have to be government run to use your brains and practice hygiene that sick children should be home and not exposing other children to whatever their sick with to prevent the disease from spreading further?

notshanarishona

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:41 am

amother Peach wrote:

OP children with hand foot and mouth are allowed to go to school still, unless they feel unwell. Carrying on the playgroup with your baby having it is absolutely fine

My son was not allowed in school for ten days with this. Every school is different but you can’t fault a parent for not wanting it.

leilatov1

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:45 am

My childminder has a clear policy. When she is open you pay. Kid is sick. Pay. You go away. Pay.
I think this is fair. You don't get a refund from school if your kid is off.
She does try to make up days.if my kid is sick on Monday she will try and give me a Tuesday slot etc

amother

Narcissus

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:53 am

amother Peach wrote:

OP children with hand foot and mouth are allowed to go to school still, unless they feel unwell. Carrying on the playgroup with your baby having it is absolutely fine

They can’t go within 24 hours of the fever

amother

Narcissus

Fri, Sep 30 2022, 8:53 am

amother OP wrote:

We have that for schools but not for small privately run playgroups unless they're ofsted registered.

I don’t mean an official rule. I mean that the Morah says in fairness to her and to the other kids this is the policy. It almost doesn’t even need to be said. Common sense.

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