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-> Vacation and Traveling
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amother
OP
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 Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:19 pm
My shul and my neighborhood had a major exodus this past sunday, and last night immediately after the fast, all going to Israel for succos. All the rich/movers and shakers are out. I was a bit wistful since I haven't been to Israel in many years and cant afford a short trip with my husband, let alone a full succos with the entire family and the additional costs of going during peak/busy season.
However, a good friend of mine with very wealthy in laws just gave me a whole sob story that she was looking forward to staying home for succos and hosting her married kids, but her in laws put a lot of pressure to join them in Israel, and her husband felt he needed to do this for his parents (I think he's an only child, and his parents didn't want to go alone, and were sponsoring the trip). I said something along the lines of how she's going to have a great time, she's so lucky to be in EY for succos etc, and she started ranting about she doesnt even want to go, her her married kids, who are also coming, have very young kids who are horrible travelers, will be jetlagged both in Israel and when they get back, and the stress of moving from one location to another during chol hamoed since the trip was sort of last minute and there weren't rentals that could have them for the whole time, so they will have to move after a few days. Some of her grandkids have allergies so she needs to bring food along and be busy cooking it there, how they will be squished, etc, since the rental only has room for each family to have one room, not more, so everyone will be sleeping with their kids etc. This woman has been in Israel for succos over a dozen times, and was home many years as well, and said in a heartbeat she would choose to stay home for YT at this age/stage of life.
At first I thought she was pulling my leg and trying to make me feel like I was the lucky one staying home, but some of the things she said she would have to deal with sound pretty awful.
From personal experience, I lived in Israel as a newlywed years ago and found succos to be really nice, I loved it, but I honestly loved "real life" more, the cozy winters of true EY living, then the touristy-throngs-of-people-everywhere vibe that happens in the month of tishrei.
I loved going to birchas kohanim, and simchas beis hashoevas, but there was also something so special about going to the Kotel on quieter days, walking through geulah during the mornings, the shops being emptier etc.
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amother
Hotpink
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:27 pm
My friend went with 7 young children. She didn't want to go, but because it's trendy this year, her husband put a lot of pressure on her. She's miserable. She said it's so packed, you can't get anywhere. Wherever you go, you bump in to people. She needs to make yom tov, the kids are cranky and bored. She said it's a waste of money to go for sukkos. The most expensive time and it's so crowded.
A neighbor also went. They're extending their stay by 10 days. She said otherwise it's not worth the money because it's too crowded to go anywhere.
Another neighbor went last year, also with young children, she said never again. Was very hard on her. I think that going alone with young children when you don't have family there, is extremely hard.
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shabbatiscoming
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:27 pm
Of course real life living in Israel is better than a vacation. Im sorry for anyone who disagrees, but of course it is.
Vacation is stressful, even if its to Israel. Jetlag sticks. And you arent in your own home.
I like sukot but I love other things here in Israel more. But Ive lived here for almost 20 years.
A sukot trip is going to be stressful one way or another no matter what one goes through or not. Living out of suitcases and either in someone else's home or a hotel.
Obviously more people that go want to, but Im sure there are those that do it out of duty.
Its definitely not everyone's cup of tea.
I love my own bed 
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shabbatiscoming
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:31 pm
| amother Hotpink wrote: | My friend went with 7 young children. She didn't want to go, but because it's trendy this year, her husband put a lot of pressure on her. She's miserable. She said it's so packed, you can't get anywhere. Wherever you go, you bump in to people. She needs to make yom tov, the kids are cranky and bored. She said it's a waste of money to go for sukkos. The most expensive time and it's so crowded.
A neighbor also went. They're extending their stay by 10 days. She said otherwise it's not worth the money because it's too crowded to go anywhere.
Another neighbor went last year, also with young children, she said never again. Was very hard on her. I think that going alone with young children when you don't have family there, is extremely hard. | About it being crowded everywhere, its a known thing that chol hamoed in Israel its crowded EVERYWHERE  Unless you get to your destination as it opens, its crowded.
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ora_43
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:32 pm
Great how?
It's really special being here over Sukkot because it's the closest we can get to aliyah l'regel in our days.
But as a vacation? It's easier and cheaper and more convenient to come when the country isn't full of other tourists.
I mean, I am Israeli, and I'd think twice before going a lot of places on chol hamoed. Nothing is fun when 10,000 other people are trying to do it at the same time.
That said there are a lot of fun things to do over chol hamoed, too! It's just a very high-energy trip if you're specifically going to, say, the zoo mid-morning on chol hamoed, Ben Yehuda market on a Friday morning... But there are plenty of sites that feel full without feeling unpleasantly crowded.
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amother
Tulip
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:33 pm
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I went as a kid for succos before it was the thing to do, and I was there when I was in sem. It's really special. You feel the yom tov in the streets and it's a magical experience. But I wouldn't go into debt or do it if it wasn't a comfortable situation. I'm glad I experienced it though.
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ora_43
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:34 pm
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And yeah, agree with shabbatiscoming that travel itself is just hard. We sometimes get invited for Shabbat by those few, brave friends and relatives who think they can handle the noise, and honestly? It is such a headache. Like, I love being there, I love seeing them, but it is sooo much easier to make Shabbat at home than to pack everyone up and travel for a few hours.
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DrMom
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:39 pm
Sukkot in Israel is definitely more enjoyable (IMO) than in chu"l, but travelling during peak season is always stressful.
Whether in E"Y or abroad, I always prefer to travel during shoulder season, if possible.
I must say that it does sound as if your opinions are being influenced heavily by envy of your friend's financial situation.
Last edited by DrMom on Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:44 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Hotpink
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 4:42 pm
| shabbatiscoming wrote: | | About it being crowded everywhere, its a known thing that chol hamoed in Israel its crowded EVERYWHERE Unless you get to your destination as it opens, its crowded. |
Not talking specifically about chol hamoed. Talking about this month in general. It's very crowded, especially in Yerushalayim where most people that travel to Israel for sukkos are at.
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Raisin
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 5:00 pm
I think that women's particular circumstances make it especially hard. When I was younger, I think I could handle crowded or uncomfortable acccomodation a lot better. Also, I can handle it if it means spending time with people I enjoy being with. Plus the food issues.
But if you know you are going somewhere with spacious and comfortable accomodation, and someone else is making food you can all eat, why not?
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amother
OP
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 5:11 pm
| DrMom wrote: | Sukkot in Israel is definitely more enjoyable (IMO) than in chu"l, but travelling during peak season is always stressful.
Whether in E"Y or abroad, I always prefer to travel during shoulder season, if possible.
I must say that it does sound as if your opinions are being influenced heavily by envy of your friend's financial situation. |
Nope. I am so not envious of her or her money. Her in laws are impossible- I'll just say that. Pressuring her into going to Israel for succos when she didn't want to is one of the nicest things they have involved themselves with in terms of her personal life and choices. Although I am not "rich enough" to comfortably take my entire family to Israel for succos, and don't have anyone offering to sponsor me like she does, I love my life where my husband and I support ourselves independently, live comfortably, and make our own decisions. If you knew the details of this womans in-law situation you would never have assumed I was envious.
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Growing
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 5:24 pm
nah
I think it's just the hock
the thing to do
that said it is very special- it's eretz yisroel
as a child or teen it's much more enjoyable than as the parent obviously unless you're being wined and dined
Last edited by Growing on Thu, Oct 06 2022, 5:28 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Dahlia
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 5:26 pm
| amother OP wrote: | My shul and my neighborhood had a major exodus this past sunday, and last night immediately after the fast, all going to Israel for succos. All the rich/movers and shakers are out. I was a bit wistful since I haven't been to Israel in many years and cant afford a short trip with my husband, let alone a full succos with the entire family and the additional costs of going during peak/busy season.
However, a good friend of mine with very wealthy in laws just gave me a whole sob story that she was looking forward to staying home for succos and hosting her married kids, but her in laws put a lot of pressure to join them in Israel, and her husband felt he needed to do this for his parents (I think he's an only child, and his parents didn't want to go alone, and were sponsoring the trip). I said something along the lines of how she's going to have a great time, she's so lucky to be in EY for succos etc, and she started ranting about she doesnt even want to go, her her married kids, who are also coming, have very young kids who are horrible travelers, will be jetlagged both in Israel and when they get back, and the stress of moving from one location to another during chol hamoed since the trip was sort of last minute and there weren't rentals that could have them for the whole time, so they will have to move after a few days. Some of her grandkids have allergies so she needs to bring food along and be busy cooking it there, how they will be squished, etc, since the rental only has room for each family to have one room, not more, so everyone will be sleeping with their kids etc. This woman has been in Israel for succos over a dozen times, and was home many years as well, and said in a heartbeat she would choose to stay home for YT at this age/stage of life.
At first I thought she was pulling my leg and trying to make me feel like I was the lucky one staying home, but some of the things she said she would have to deal with sound pretty awful.
From personal experience, I lived in Israel as a newlywed years ago and found succos to be really nice, I loved it, but I honestly loved "real life" more, the cozy winters of true EY living, then the touristy-throngs-of-people-everywhere vibe that happens in the month of tishrei.
I loved going to birchas kohanim, and simchas beis hashoevas, but there was also something so special about going to the Kotel on quieter days, walking through geulah during the mornings, the shops being emptier etc. |
I'm Israeli and I'm with you. I prefer the real day-to-day living to the loud noisy packed tourist season.
It's really tiring to travel with kids and it's not much of a vacation. I would rather stay home for the holidays and buy takeout so I don't have to cook, that's a vacation.
Your friend's trip sounds awful.
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HonesttoGod
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 5:39 pm
It’s the “thing to do”. So people do it even if it’s hard.
I get it every situation is hard for a person in a different way and everyone has a right to complain however if you’re complaining to someone in USA about how horrible it is to be on an all expenses paid trip to Israel in the hottest season, really bad taste.
Also, I would personally never do it for succos. Even though most of our friends / family is there now, I would much rather go in 2 weeks. Or even chanukah. Not for the peak peak season after 3 years of many not being able to go.
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Bnei Berak 10
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 5:43 pm
All depends on family size, if you are wined and dined the whole vacation or you got to cook three times a day, if flights are ok or a nightmare and white you stay etc.
If you can stand crowds or if you hate it.
Every chol hamoed as well as ben hazmanim in Av is packed no matter were you go. All kids are off from school.
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amother
Hotpink
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 6:14 pm
My friend that lives in Yerushalayim was just telling me that she barely leaves the house nowadays because the crowds everywhere are so overwhelming. She went to shuk machne yehuda today, you couldn't walk. It was so crowded.
But there are people that love it.
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Rappel
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 6:29 pm
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Y'all are giving me a desire to go to Yerushalayim right now it must be like how it was in the real shalosh regalim - everyone coming in, everyone hosting! I can't wait to see that!
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amother
Cognac
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 6:32 pm
The people I know that are going are getting / taking along paid childcare, plus having a private chef cook all their food. I can imagine that’s pretty nice.
I still have absolutely no desire to do it.
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Elfrida
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 6:35 pm
| amother Hotpink wrote: | My friend that lives in Yerushalayim was just telling me that she barely leaves the house nowadays because the crowds everywhere are so overwhelming. She went to shuk machne yehuda today, you couldn't walk. It was so crowded.
But there are people that love it. |
To be fair, the shuk is always very busy on Thursday, even without Yom Tov as an additional factor. Tourists love it, but its hard if you're trying to go shopping.
But when I think how limited tourists were last year and how the country was entirely closed two years ago, I can only say Baruch Hashem.
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amother
Green
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Thu, Oct 06 2022, 6:44 pm
Yes. Yes it is. Sometimes rich people like to complain so that you’re not envious of their lives.
I went a few times for succos, once with young kids, and it was wonderful. Yes there’s a crowd by the kotel - that’s the point!!!
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