Does anyone not bother with first course - Shabbos day

chanchy123

Thu, Oct 27 2022, 4:51 pm

chocolate moose wrote:

You can't put fish and meat out togehter

I know it might come as a shock to many people here, but I don’t usually serve fish and meat in the same meal - it’s generally either or (many times fish for dinner and meat for lunch).
I also don’t serve cholent every week, generally only in the winter and if we have guests.
We actually serve the cholent in separate bowls a lot of times, and I always have a full main course with sides besides the cholent (because I don’t really love cholent- to me it’s a side dish).

Aurora

Thu, Oct 27 2022, 4:53 pm

chanchy123 wrote:

Us too.

I actually don't know how to make a chulent. My mom's side is yekkishe, and chulent just isn't in the usual menu.

I finally learned how to make a beef stew that I can serve though, but I only bother if we're having guests.

chanchy123

Thu, Oct 27 2022, 4:58 pm

Aurora wrote:

Lol my mom also hardly ever made cholent growing up, I know how to make it but don’t usually bother unless it’s really cold or we’re hosting a crowd.
OTOH My MIL makes one every week and DH really enjoys it, so generally he’ll be the one making it because he likes to have it and serve it to guests.
DH is not that much of a cook but his few specialties besides variations of eggs are cholent and herring and he’s attempted ptcha - if you notice a theme here.

Raisin

Thu, Oct 27 2022, 5:09 pm

During covid when we never had guests I did a lot of milchig shabbos meals. Garlic knots, pesto, cheese board, fish, and cheesecake/ice cream for dessert. We all loved it.

Some of my family LOVE not being flieshig shabbos afternoon, (we wait 6 hours) so I often do 2 courses so those who don't want to be fleishig can just eat fish.

You can actually serve fish and meat at the same table, at weddings there is often a fish option. As long as people don't put it on the same plate.

amother

Geranium

Thu, Oct 27 2022, 5:13 pm

Raisin wrote:

I wouldn't put cholent on the same plate as salad, halachic concerns aside. Its just not so appetising.

Even if I serve one course of salads, dips, cold cuts, etc I will give out cholent in bowls.

We don't eat cholent on the same plate as salads either. I was addressing the halachic side of that because someone else brought it up and because I've seen it at other people's houses as a guest.

amother

Skyblue

Thu, Oct 27 2022, 11:39 pm

amother OP wrote:

At some point, DH and I reached the conclusion that dividing up Shabbos lunch into "courses" served no useful purpose. We put everything out on the table at once - main course + sides, and the salads/dips/chopped liver that I might once have put out for a first course. Those who so wish can continue nibbling at the salads and dips throughout the meal.

Does anyone else do this, or are we the only slackers? Does it seem not shabbosdig to not break things up formally into "courses?"

We don't entertain much, except for an elderly relative and a couple of single/divorced friends who seem fine with this arrangement. I was wondering, though, if we were to start inviting other people over besides these regulars, if the guests would be scandalized ...

You don’t serve fish along with meat/chicken/cholent I hope?

amother

Skyblue

Thu, Oct 27 2022, 11:39 pm

WitchKitty wrote:

Day meal we eat only cholent. If I have guests that I think won't be full enough from cholent I'll add eggs, potato kugel, or kishka into the cholent, and add dessert.
DH davens in a chassidish shul. By the time davening and kiddush is over there isn't any point in stuffing in so much extra food.

It’s a big inyan to have fish at every seuda on Shabbos,

amother

Skyblue

Thu, Oct 27 2022, 11:44 pm

Raisin wrote:

Dairy on Shabbos? “Bassar v’dagim.” It’s an inyan to have on Shabbos.

BetsyTacy

Thu, Oct 27 2022, 11:57 pm

amother Slategray wrote:

As it says: בשר ודגים וכל מטעמים

And some people interpret that as over the course of shabbos not at every meal.

And some interpret that as whatever you consider to be fancier than your everyday meal. Traditionally meat and fish were fancier. But if that is not what feels fancy /special to you, this is not actual halacha. It's more that if you have pb&j for lunch every day, you save your special food for shabbos and serve something nicer for shabbos. Cheesecake sounds pretty nice to me and is definitely not considered an everyday dessert!

oakandfig19

Fri, Oct 28 2022, 12:04 am

I’m more likely to skip first course Friday night when it’s just my family. We’ll do just challah, soup, then mains. I always serve salads Shabbos day, sometimes with fish and sometimes without, but either way I like to have salad before cholent.

doodlesmom

Fri, Oct 28 2022, 12:13 am

Just saying a meal with courses ends up having a better flow conversation wise and singing wise in my house.

So even if I do buffet, I do try to separate the meal a bit by only doing buffet as a main. And serving soup and dessert.

Bnei Berak 10

Fri, Oct 28 2022, 3:17 am

Raisin wrote:

Plated fish course it a wedding is very different from a home setting where it's far too easy to make a mistake and mix things.

amother

Skyblue

Fri, Oct 28 2022, 1:27 pm

BetsyTacy wrote:

No. Do you think if you went to any random rov’s house on Shabbos, it’s even a possibility they’d be eating dairy? There’s a reason. It’s Hassan v’ Daimler. Can’t be interpreted differently.

amother

Cantaloupe

Fri, Oct 28 2022, 1:38 pm

amother Skyblue wrote:

“Bassar v’dagim” is a quote from a zemer, not a halacha. If you looked into the halacha, the Shulchan Aruch Harav very clearly states there is no obligation to eat meat on shabbos, rather, one should increase the foods they personally like on shabbos to receive more enjoyment. If someone enjoys dairy more than meat, they should have dairy.

etky

Sat, Oct 29 2022, 1:24 pm

Aurora wrote:

We do challah & salad, then the main course.

But if I'm at someone's house, I'm just happy that the person(people) thought of us to invite us. I wouldn't worry too much.

Us too.
For many years now, a big green salad + challah has been our standard first course for Shabbat lunch.
After that there is the main course (usually one protein, and three cooked veggie/carb sides) and then dessert.
Friday night dinner is the same format but with soup (I have a rotation of about a dozen) as a standard instead of the salad.
I make cholent on average 3-4 times a year, between Succot and Pesach. We enjoy it but don't want to eat it every week. It's nice as a change from chicken or my other standard meat dishes.
When we have guests I do augment the main course and usually serve something other than salad for a first course. The green salad will then get transferred to the main course.
I really like that we have salad as a standard first course when it's just us, because everyone partakes and gets a nice healthy serving of greens and other raw veggies.
I find that when served as an accompaniment to the main course the salad doesn't always get eaten.
It's also nice to have a standard default for one course. It's hard enough figuring out the rest of the menu every single week...