Multiple hair issues - help needed.

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children

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amother

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 8:00 am

My daughter has very thick frizzy hair. She also has terrible seborrheic dermatitis on her scalp (we've tried EVERYTHING (both Rx and otc without success). In addition, (due to the weight of her hair?) She has a receding hairline. We created side bangs (ironed) to take the pressure off her forehead, but now we are noticing baldish spots behind her bangs as the rest of her hair is still pulling (just further back) from her pony or braid (in a scrunchie, to minimize the pulling). Having such frizzy and thick hair prevents us from getting a short haircuts and wearing it down. We need a specialist to help with all these issues while understanding the needs of a high school girl to fit-in with her peers and look presentable in an easy to manage way. We are in Lakewood, but willing to drive further out for the right resource. Help please!

amother

Milk

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 8:11 am

Pulling in back tightly, ironing it, etc could be what's causing the balding spots.
I think your best bet is to go to an expert who knows how to cut and care for that type of hair as well teaching you how to style and which products to use.
It's quite expensive but I know people who had luck with Ouidad. The flagship shop is in NYC but I think there may be other locations possibly. If you can afford it, that's something to look into.
As far as scalp issue, have you checked with a dermatologist? There are medicated shampoos etc that may help.

LovesHashem

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 8:18 am

Try the curly girl method

amother

Milk

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 8:27 am

LovesHashem wrote:

Try the curly girl method

Isn't Deva the product they recommend? I've read a lot of stuff online abt Deva shampoo and products causing people to lose hair. There may even be a lawsuit that was going on at some point.
The method may be ok, but op needs to find which products work.

amother

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 8:29 am

She has a LOT of hair so even though we aren't pulling tightly at all, the weight seems to be causing the bald spots. Only ironing bangs and only twice a week, just enough so their not too frizzy to hide her HUGE forehead. We've gone to a dermatologist without success in the many many things they suggested. The flaking is noticeable and no matter what we try, it's still there. I need someone that can take everything into consideration...

amother

Milk

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 8:33 am

amother OP wrote:

Just wearing it pulled back in a pony may be the culprit, it is surprisingly common. Ironing shouldn't be done at all. This type of hair is very delicate. I really do recommend ouidad. Look up their website.

amother

Oxfordblue

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 8:39 am

Find a referral for a top dermatologist that specializes in hair loss. Ask your ped or call a place like Refuah, Echo, Chaim Medical etc.. Chaim Medical is amazing, btw..

Best might be to give a short (as short as possible with her still feeling ‘normal’) haircut to completely avoid the weight and any need for ponies, hair accessories or ironing for the foreseeable future.

This method has worked to a large degree. Of course still need to deal with the actual issue at hand.

Bhatzlacha!

amother

Seablue

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 8:44 am

I really don’t think the bald spots are coming from weight of hair. I also have very thick hair and I keep it very long to weigh it down. the only time I ever had a bald spot (in the middle of the scalp not receding) was due to severe stress I was going through at the time.

Don’t get offended but I think maybe getting advice or reading about African people and how they manage their hair May be beneficial. I know that target, at least in my area, added a whole entire section dedicated to hair products specifically targeting African Americans.

In high school I had a friend with the same issues you’re describing down to the dandruff and she used to iron, gel, chemically treat, or do whatever she could to fight against her Hair. When I saw her again in college she had fully embraced the nature of her hair and she looked way better than ever. It’s a matter of building confidence and standing out with pride instead of trying to blend in with the stick straight lucky girls. Because don’t forget, they also try everything to try to get their hair to curl.

I hope you figure it out

amother

Broom

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 8:52 am

My daughter had the scalp issues we tired many things till we found what worked for us and we are lucky her scalp is clearer now don’t have a reason . We did a pro addiction treatment on her hair and it really tamed it I am all for leaving it natural but we tried so many things and even if her hair looked good for a bit it would end up frizzing and puffing the treatment we did still gives it a wavy look we didn’t go full stick straight

amother

Fri, Dec 02 2022, 7:48 am

Wanted to report back that we got a Ouidad cut last night! It's a MAJOR change for us, and my daughter was terrified of going to school today, as she looks completely different now. Davening that no one says anything stupid... Her hair is so much lighter in weight though and at minimum, if she can wear it down this way, this will give it a chance to heal and regrow at bit. Deep breaths!! Thanks for the recommendation!!

amother

Periwinkle

Fri, Dec 02 2022, 8:29 am

Is it possible her hair is falling out from the psoriasis or psoriasis like condition? I just posted on that other scalp post, about our experience with only homeopathy working for the skin issue. I wonder if that could help her too. And if she's stressed about it the hair loss can also be from that

amother

Milk

Fri, Dec 02 2022, 9:33 am

amother OP wrote:

They've got lots of products, too. Lately I've seen their reasonably priced, more affordable line (Twist) being carried in regular drug stores such as CVS and Walgreens. Conditioners, gels, etc.

amother

Green

Fri, Dec 02 2022, 10:51 am

You can fix it. Experienced successful advice here.. Send her once a week to a hair salon for wash, blow & dry. They will wash her hair properly aka washing the scalp which is difficult to get to with thick frizzy hair. After two months of weekly, (and she should not wash her hair at home unless it gets greasy or smelly for now) never ever ever let her not blow dry her hair after washing. Buy her the newer type of blow dryer that has infrared ions. It will help kill the bacteria problem. The wet scalp makes the problem perpetuate. Use cheap basic shampoo like suave and a conditioner for dry frizzy hair. The hair is falling out probably because of the crust on her scalp.

Later ( or now) you might buy her a flat iron or blow dryer brush to make it easier to straighten if she doesn't want to use curly girl method.

amother

Burgundy

Fri, Dec 02 2022, 12:53 pm

for alot thick heavy hair that you are describing, a thinning could really help.

amother

Milk

Fri, Dec 02 2022, 12:55 pm

amother Burgundy wrote:

for alot thick heavy hair that you are describing, a thinning could really help.

If her hair is thinning to the point of bald spots, this not a good idea.
Most pple don't know how to manage this type of hair. Going to a place like ouidad was the best option bec they do.

Frumme

Fri, Dec 02 2022, 1:16 pm

Is it possible she has a sensitivity to sulfates that could be causing the scalp issue? Try to get a sulfate free shampoo, a really good one is OGX (blue, purple, or the white coconut curls one are all good options), and get a silicone free conditioner (bc silicone can weigh down curls)

yachnabobba

Sat, Dec 03 2022, 8:09 pm

Did you consider visiting a stylist that specializes in African American hair?

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