Changing Position at Work (Shudder)

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amother

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 7:36 pm

I am currently 7+ years at my current job. My boss is shifting more and more responsibility towards my side. I usually don't mind it, as long that its quiet work. The issue is that I'm an introvert and lately he wants me to be on top of the other workers. Director. Manager. Wtver you want to call it. We used to do interviews together and last week, we had an interview scheduled, he called me up 10 minutes before 'I wont be able to be there, do it yourself' It's a week later and I'm still stuttering.

Im the type that 'you make the decision and Ill support it'. I have no interest in being on top or correcting other ppl.

The situation wont change, since the company is growing and I am the oldest employee. The other's are way younger than me.

How can I change myself?

amother

Seashell

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 7:45 pm

Have confidence in yourself. You can do it. And fake it till you make it.

amother

White

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 7:54 pm

You should be getting paid more, commensurate with your increased responsibility...... use that to motivate you to fake it till you make it.

amother

Hyacinth

Tue, Nov 22 2022, 7:57 pm

Personal growth happens when we struggle. It's hard but we need to take risks to grow. It's not good to be stagnant.

Also, we lie to ourselves most often... "Good lies remove imposter syndrome." So fake it 'til ya make it Smile

amother

Aubergine

Wed, Nov 23 2022, 7:11 pm

Same.

I just told my boss that they are my workmates and I don’t want to boss them.
He didn’t like it but at least he doesn’t make them ask me when they want to take off. Like do you seriously think I’ll tell them no??

amother

Raspberry

Sun, Nov 27 2022, 10:51 am

it sounds like the opportunities he's giving you will really help you grow! I wouldn't recommend pushing them away... rather grow into the role! Have you tried self mastery classes like Dina Friedman or Chaya Hinda Allen? It sounds like you may have a lot of negative self talk that's keeping you back. If that is the case maybe consider a course... I think the positive effects will spill over into your work and home life as well.

On the flip side I'm a big extrovert and admire the middah of holding back and not always commenting and giving others their space! There is def. a place for that as long as it's healthy and not from lack of self esteem...

Hatzlacha!

amother

Bronze

Sun, May 21 2023, 9:51 pm

Hey, OP!

I wonder how you're doing in your leadership role...

I am an introvert myself in the same situation. Although, I feel like my work has taught me so many life and social skills...

Care to update us?

amother

Mon, May 29 2023, 9:40 pm

amother Bronze wrote:

Bh business is booming so I don't really have time to think to deep. Just handing out orders to get things done.. keeping the atmosphere very pareve like a drop authority but not enough they should feel edgy around me.

Bh there's a sweet team on my side. Very easy going girls.

One issue I'm juggling with, wonder all of your opinions.

One girl has certain weak points. But she also has strong points. Every conversation with my boss he points out her weak point and I kind of defend her. I feel like telling him, just let go and focus on the positive. Don't hold onto the negative. But obviously I can't say anything.

How do you deal with the things you can't tell your boss?

amother

Mon, May 29 2023, 9:43 pm

amother Bronze wrote:

Hey, OP!

Although, I feel like my work has taught me so many life and social skills...

Care to update us?

So true. I'm working for 12 years. So many clients, customers vendors coworkers. And... personalities. I refer to it as the beauty of Hashems creation. So many different characters!! Unbelievable!

amother

Lime

Mon, May 29 2023, 9:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

"I see that too, but overall her performance is good, and I think she's an asset to the team".

champion

Mon, May 29 2023, 11:11 pm

You sound like a wonderful manager. The skills you are lacking can be learnt and those that cant sounds like you already have!!
Good luck.

amother

Cyan

Tue, May 30 2023, 3:36 am

I am introvert and a manager. I try to view it as helping my coworkers, I love to help people, rather than managing them. But really just fake it until you make it. I also view it like parenting. I am responsible for guidjng these people and helping tbem maximize their skills and potential to carry out their responsibilities.

I built management rules for myself and I just follow those - I focus on following my system rather than on bossing. The rules make it easier for me. Like rules for deciding who to assign which work to which employee, rules for allowing work from home or days off, rules for office hours, rules for how often to check in on each person (and never micromanage!), rules for giving feedback (sandwich consteuctive feedback in positve feedback, and never ever yell). Having a system makes it much easier because I am not fumbling to figure out what to do. The people I manage say I am a not the most warm but I am very fair and consistent. They like having me as manager and prefer to stay on my team than other managers' teams.

Also, if yoj have a worker who has steengrhs and weaknesses, you can totally talk to your boss openly about it, since you are both managing her. Explain her strong pojnts and validate the weak points he sees and explain how you plan to help her with them. He will feel heard and so will you.

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