S/O gifts for kallah

amother

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 6:54 am

What gifts do you give for a kallah?
I’ll start:
Bracelet
Diamond ring
Necklace
Earrings
Watch
Machzorim
Siddur
Tehilim
Baby album of chosson
Silver candlesticks
Optional for birthday or other occasions. Gifts like jewelry roll up, evening bag, vanity set, camera

Chayalle

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 7:00 am

As a Kallah, I received a bracelet and diamond ring (and flowers at various occasions - vort, Shabbos Kallah, and wedding bouquet). Wedding band. I was given pearls in the yichud room, and candlesticks the first Shabbos. DH also bought me a siddur (don't remember who paid for it).

I'm just wondering what the point of this thread is. Comparisons? Pressure?

Last edited by Chayalle on Mon, Nov 28 2022, 7:06 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

cornflower

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 7:05 am

So cute that you give a baby album of the chosson!

Bracelet
Engagement ring
Wedding ring
Candlesticks plus tray and brachos card
Birthday present (nice costume jewelry)
Pearls in yichud room - many kallahs prefer something different
Also just help buying things to set up the house as it comes up.

Bnei Berak 10

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 7:06 am

amother OP wrote:

What is a vanity set?
Apologize for my ignorance.

amother

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 7:08 am

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

What is a vanity set?
Apologize for my ignorance.

For the dresser in bedroom. Usually a pretty tray with a matching picture frame, perfume, ring catcher...

Chayalle

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 7:21 am

To be honest, some of these gifts sound rather superfluous. I sure hope everyone isn't spending on these things that a Kallah does not need (and would not necessarily appreciate. Or would rather choose her own, like decor-type items or personal accessories.)

Bnei Berak 10

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 7:31 am

Chayalle wrote:

The most superflourus I've seen her on imamother is a silver vase Speechless

Ironically I found myself in a special sale for sterling silver last Purim and bought a small vase with a silver base for a single flower Rolling Laughter

Chayalle

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 7:44 am

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

The most superflourus I've seen her on imamother is a silver vase Speechless

Ironically I found myself in a special sale for sterling silver last Purim and bought a small vase with a silver base for a single flower Rolling Laughter

OK but you choose it for yourself. You can buy yourself any knicknacks you want. I would not have wanted my MIL AH to choose chatchkes for my home, bedroom dresser, etc...as a gift.

amother

Blueberry

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 8:11 am

As a BT who didn’t get these ‘gifts’ from her in-laws, I am growing more resentful of this mentality that kallahs just get things upon marriage. And then throw a tantrum if they don’t get what they feel they deserve.
FYI, I feel the same about the chosson ‘gifts’.
Is it just me?

Chayalle

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 8:15 am

amother Blueberry wrote:

I'm FFB. I appreciated the gifts I was given, and did not throw a tantrum about those I was not. Neither did DH.

It's not just you.

amother

Periwinkle

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 8:28 am

amother Blueberry wrote:

Jewelry for kallah is kind of standard in frum circles. I don't why you get upset. I also come from a non-frum background.
Kallahs that had too high expectations are able to buy themselves what they want it a later stage.

ChalieB

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 8:31 am

I didn't get any gifts from my in-laws, just from my DH when we were engaged. My parents got him a nice watch. All of these are wonderful and lovely, but not necessary by any means...

amother

Linen

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 10:05 am

All the items in the OP sound like standards in the chassidishe communities. Yeshivishe folks don't do baby albums and vanity sets/handbags, and I think (hope?) they do less jewelry, but it probably depends on the circles.

amother

Broom

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 10:36 am

I got
A necklace
A gold wedding band
Pearl earrings
A leather Siddur, Machzor, Chitas, Sefer Hamitzvos
Silver candlesticks

In laws also paid our first month rent and security deposit, bought used furniture for us, and set up the apartment. A few months later they also helped us get a used car.

I’m very lucky, my in-laws are great!

amother

Maroon

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 10:46 am

Cz ( not real diamond) engagement ring + wedding band
Diamond earrings
Gold watch
Pearl necklace
Handbag
Machzorim & siddur

amother

Aster

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 11:28 am

Very common in my circles to get the silver candlesticks from grandparents.

They usually cannot cover the $1500 as the families are large and many grandparents make a sheva brochos too.

I got money from 3 grandparents, I pooled it and chose my own candlesticks. I had some leftover money and added my own and bought a matching tray.

amother

Mint

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 12:06 pm

Bracelet
diamond necklace
pearl necklace
earrings
diamond ring
watch
Brand name bag
Band for sheitel
machsorim
siddur
tehillim
techinos
Flowers for engagment

From grandparents I got silver candelsticks.
From other grandparents got oil leichter.
From great grandmother a silver tray.

Plus more silver.

short while After the wedding

Diamond ring

Very appreciated.

Bnei Berak 10

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 12:22 pm

amother Mint wrote:

Oil leichter is a candelabra, right? Wow.
In chareidi litvish circles kallos never get a candelabra.

Guess you are in chadsidish circles?

watergirl

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 12:25 pm

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

Oil leichter is a candelabra, right? Wow.
In chareidi litvish circles kallos never get a candelabra.

Guess you are in chadsidish circles?

My guess is that this person is in wealthy circles, not necessarily chassidish.

amother

Charcoal

Mon, Nov 28 2022, 12:30 pm

watergirl wrote:

My guess is that this person is in wealthy circles, not necessarily chassidish.

The poster is probably wealthy, but she mentions a band for a sheitel, so I would venture chassidish.