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Forum -> Hobbies, Crafts, and Collections -> The Imamother Writing Club
“Poetry”
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tryinghard




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 12:18 am
It seems some amothers will try
To express their heart’s deepest cry
To write down every thought
Every battle they’ve fought
And they hope that no eye will stay dry.

But the thing that they miss all the while
In composing the tale of the trial
Is emotion can be felt
And quite plainly spell’t
without sticking to that one harsh style
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amother
Apricot


 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 12:31 am
There was a poster on Imamother
Who was frustrated by another
Who'd write poetry
That was phony
So she said, hey sister, I'd rather a brother
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shaqued_almond




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 3:36 am
So, technically, postmodern poems don't have to rhyme or keep a rhythm and putting it in poetry form is enough. HOWEVER, poets who started doing this usually had a reason and they did have some knowledge of what poetry conventions were. The same way that Picasso still had to know how a violin looks like to make a cubist rendition of it. Good poetry is difficult to produce, and I daresay it sounds very pretentious when not done well. Many times I find it harder to take people seriously when they produce poems like a fourteen year old. Poems are sort of the puns of literature, anyone can do it but not everyone can do it whale. As you can see from my example.
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imasinger




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 6:50 am
This
is not
a poem.

.........

And this, although I took the time
To craft a rhythm and a rhyme,
Is really not a poem as well --
It used to be called "doggerel".

.......
Refinery

When raw emotion gushes
And words pour out in rushes
It marks a start;
But sometimes drops
In gelid pools.

By process of refining,
Of crafting and designing;
I might make art --
Whether or not
I follow rules,

Will this work be worth holding,
With meanings still unfolding,
Or just condense;
A wordy brew
That's all congealed?

First comes the geyser, spewing;
Then, shaping and reviewing,
A contact lens
Through which a new
insight's revealed.


Last edited by imasinger on Tue, Jan 24 2023, 10:37 pm; edited 4 times in total
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amother
Moonstone


 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 7:52 am
I teach poetry and the poetry in Jewish magazines and on this website is rarely what I’d describe as good writing.

That being said, I’d like to clarify:
1. A poem doesn’t need to rhyme. In fact, I tell my students NOT to rhyme because I don’t want them to limit themselves to whatever line fits the rhyme scheme.
2. Breaking up prose into short lines and stanzas doesn’t automatically make something a poem. There needs to be rhythm! Strong emotion! Maybe some repetition, imagery, figurative language, or a sound device. Something that elevates it from prose.
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sequoia




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 8:07 am
I wrote this one year ago.
It doesn’t rhyme, but I venture to think it’s poetry.


When winter comes we bury in each other like otters
Tread velvetly on each other like cats
Mreowing when the radiators are insufficient
Looking out the window as though we are beautiful,
Sitting on the window sill, attracting attention,
“Look... look... he has three cats!”

Sleep till two, raise the blinds resignedly
Up-down, up-down, scarcely an hour of light
Slide down Andriivs'kyi descent, heedless of danger
Look at the patterns of tree branches
“If only I had a good camera!”

We read Topelius, watch endless Seinfeld,
Throw on wool sweaters to take the mail,
Leave time for tights when ordering a taxi:
One pair, then the second, slowly, slowly
“I like a warm butt!”

We catch the blue twilight sitting in armchairs,
Recite Shelley, check the weather app,
Scoop fresh snow, run it over our tongues like children
Remembering the thrill of snowdays
“Do you want to shovel?”

We kvetch and moan familiarly.
If “summer” is year then what is winter?
How many winters are you?
How many winters have you seen?
The magic lessens.
But sometimes when the street lamps
Illuminate the falling snow just right
“Do you remember?... Yes... So we’ll remember this too.”
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imasinger




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 8:15 am
amother Moonstone wrote:
I teach poetry and the poetry in Jewish magazines and on this website is rarely what I’d describe as good writing.

That being said, I’d like to clarify:
1. A poem doesn’t need to rhyme. In fact, I tell my students NOT to rhyme because I don’t want them to limit themselves to whatever line fits the rhyme scheme.
2. Breaking up prose into short lines and stanzas doesn’t automatically make something a poem. There needs to be rhythm! Strong emotion! Maybe some repetition, imagery, figurative language, or a sound device. Something that elevates it from prose.


Where do you teach poetry?
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amother
Gray


 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 9:34 am
amother Apricot wrote:
There was a poster on Imamother
Who was frustrated by another
Who'd write poetry
That was phony
So she said, hey sister, I'd rather a brother


LOL
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amother
Mauve


 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 9:37 am
amother Olive wrote:
I was once young, and immature at the time
I thought all poems just had to rhyme.
Sentences I'd rearrange
Even if they sounded strange
Some lines terribly overwhelmingly long holding court
Others short
Just to get the elusive rhyming word to the right spot
Or not.

Now I'm old and mellow.
Though I hear your point
I do find my brain mentally pausing
Holding space
At the end of each line.
And sometimes I need it.
To let the words sink in
Calmly
Peacefully
Slowing me down
So I don't gobble down the paragraph
Missing the subtlety and the grace.

You don't have to like it.
I'm not always in that space
But sometimes I am.
And I like it,
That freedom to express myself
Knowing that others
Are breathing along with me.


Love this!!
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 9:55 am
🪘
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ectomorph




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 9:56 am
amother Moonstone wrote:
I teach poetry and the poetry in Jewish magazines and on this website is rarely what I’d describe as good writing.

That being said, I’d like to clarify:
1. A poem doesn’t need to rhyme. In fact, I tell my students NOT to rhyme because I don’t want them to limit themselves to whatever line fits the rhyme scheme.
2. Breaking up prose into short lines and stanzas doesn’t automatically make something a poem. There needs to be rhythm! Strong emotion! Maybe some repetition, imagery, figurative language, or a sound device. Something that elevates it from prose.

You teach poetry as literature or creative writing?
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mandr




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 11:07 am
Also, don't write a haiku with 18 syllables (yes, you, Binah).

And limericks need to be written in iambic pentameter so son't bother if your meter is flaky.

More offensive than the poetry in magazines is the poetry in kids' books! I don't want to quote actual lines but "energy" and "see" don't rhyme.
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amother
NeonPurple


 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 11:29 am
amother Moonstone wrote:
I teach poetry and the poetry in Jewish magazines and on this website is rarely what I’d describe as good writing.

That being said, I’d like to clarify:
1. A poem doesn’t need to rhyme. In fact, I tell my students NOT to rhyme because I don’t want them to limit themselves to whatever line fits the rhyme scheme.
2. Breaking up prose into short lines and stanzas doesn’t automatically make something a poem. There needs to be rhythm! Strong emotion! Maybe some repetition, imagery, figurative language, or a sound device. Something that elevates it from prose.


I teach a poetry unit as well and always require 3 poetic devices (minimum) on their final poem. Slant rhymes are the most popular pick 😄, followed by repetition. But they all submit good pieces once they focus on incorporating poetic devices. Of course, we read lots of amazing poetry first so that they know what a good poem sounds like!
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ShishKabob




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 1:07 pm
amother Pearl wrote:
There once was amother who was feeling
Her life's circumstance had her reeling
As she wrote bit by bit
Hitting the 'enter' key in a fit
She realized it helped with her healing.
love love this
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mandr




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 1:12 pm
amother Pearl wrote:
There once was amother who was feeling
Her life's circumstance had her reeling
As she wrote bit by bit
Hitting the 'enter' key in a fit
She realized it helped with her healing.


Love it! Can I just tweak it a bit to follow the rules of limericks?

An amother on here was once feeling
Her troubles in life had her reeling.
As she wrote stuff in bits
Hitting "enter" in fits,
She realized it helped with her healing.
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mandr




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 1:19 pm
There are so many women out there
Who've got plenty of poems to share.
But their work's telegraphic,
Like words stuck in traffic.
That stuff makes me pull out my hair!
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skirtsandsocks




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 3:37 pm
blame rupi kaur
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amother
Lawngreen


 

Post Tue, Jan 24 2023, 3:43 pm
mandr wrote:
Also, don't write a haiku with 18 syllables (yes, you, Binah).

And limericks need to be written in iambic pentameter so son't bother if your meter is flaky.

More offensive than the poetry in magazines is the poetry in kids' books! I don't want to quote actual lines but "energy" and "see" don't rhyme.
So many published kids’ books are just mediocre. Sad I’ve thought about writing my own book but it’s actually a lot of work to get it to sound right.
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amother
Topaz


 

Post Wed, Jan 25 2023, 12:36 am
Quote:
...Sentences I'd rearrange...


Omg. Most ridiculous aspect of frum kids literature.

It drives me batty and I feel like it makes it so hard for the kids to understand what the book is actually saying. The story comes out sounding so awkward and making no sense. But hey it rhymes! I'm a poet! and and author!

Benny was once playing with a ball.
Into a hole it did fall.
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amother
Olive


 

Post Wed, Jan 25 2023, 1:54 am
amother Topaz wrote:
Quote:
...Sentences I'd rearrange...


Omg. Most ridiculous aspect of frum kids literature.

It drives me batty and I feel like it makes it so hard for the kids to understand what the book is actually saying. The story comes out sounding so awkward and making no sense. But hey it rhymes! I'm a poet! and and author!

Benny was once playing with a ball.
Into a hole it did fall.

One cold winter day, Yossi his eyes did open up
Then said Modeh Ani and washed with his cup

There is something special about this Friday
Thought Yossi, but he couldn't remember what right away.

"Hey sleepyheads!" called Father who came in the room
"It's time to get up! Please do that soon!

"We've missed your mother, for three days she's been not here
But today I'll pick her up with the baby, never fear!"

(apologies to Dina Rosenfeld for mangling some of the best rhymes known to Jewish children's literature!)
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