With dh in a hotel with the bathroom right there

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NechaMom

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 3:53 pm

A white noise machine right outside the bathroom door?
I guess you’d still appreciate an outhouse back home.

amother

Dandelion

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 4:14 pm

I’m laughing at all the sound machine recommendations. I assumed OP was trying to avoid bringing attention to the fact that she’d be in the bathroom for a while.

NechaMom

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 4:19 pm

amother Dandelion wrote:

I’m laughing at all the sound machine recommendations. I assumed OP was trying to avoid bringing attention to the fact that she’d be in the bathroom for a while.

She specifically mentioned her husband hearing her, not timing her.
I’m sure at home he can also notice if she goes for a while.

amother

Dandelion

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 4:21 pm

NechaMom wrote:

She specifically mentioned her husband hearing her, not timing her.
I’m sure at home he can also notice if she goes for a while.

I know. I was trying to avoid saying “pooping” hence the reference to time instead.

NechaMom

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 4:22 pm

amother Dandelion wrote:

I know. I was trying to avoid saying “pooping” hence the reference to time instead.

Ok, I still don’t get why the sound machines weren’t a solution in your eyes?

Rachel Shira

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 4:56 pm

To all the sound machine recommendations/water running etc, white noise muffles what’s going on in a different room. If you turn the water on in the bathroom, the person in the other room will still hear you. Just a PSA.

NechaMom

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 5:02 pm

Rachel Shira wrote:

Right, that’s why I said a sound machine outside the bathroom/in the main room.

amother

Lotus

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 5:13 pm

Rachel Shira wrote:

At home our bathroom is attached to our bedroom and is closer than 15 feet.

yup. Isn’t that how most master bathrooms are?

amother

Melon

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 5:13 pm

Shy bladder syndrome (paruresis)
This is a type of social anxiety and can be overcome like any other anxiety if it bothers you enough and you want to put in the work.

amother

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 5:30 pm

amother Melon wrote:

Shy bladder syndrome (paruresis)
This is a type of social anxiety and can be overcome like any other anxiety if it bothers you enough and you want to put in the work.

I guess so. But I'm fortunate enough to live in a house with many bathrooms. So it's easy enough for me to go someplace private This issue only rarely comes up when I'm in a hotel or a guest somewhere.

amother

Tangerine

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 5:48 pm

amother OP wrote:

So I am uncomfortable with others hearing me use the bathroom, but not with DH.
If there's a fan in the bathroom, turn it on.

amother

Honeysuckle

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 5:48 pm

How do you feel if Heaven forbid you pass gas noisily or worse with an odor, without warning?

amother

Tuberose

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 7:55 pm

amother Dandelion wrote:

This is the one area I’m very careful about around my husband actually. We’re very comfortable around each other otherwise. I try hard to avoid him hearing me “struggling” in the bathroom lol

I will time that kind of bathroom activity wisely. Before showering or some other solution.

I have to fake the 'struggling' sometimes to get the me time in there. Rolling Laughter

amother

Snowdrop

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 9:16 pm

A little off topic, who else is embarrassed when they finish in the bathroom and then dh goes in?
Or my DC who goes in afterwards and says "mommy made a poopie" we have a bathroom garbage for dirty diapers so I like to have that as a response

amother

Arcticblue

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 9:24 pm

amother Snowdrop wrote:

You need a good air freshener spray. Teach everyone in your household to give a spritz when they are done

#BestBubby

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 9:33 pm

This reminds me of when I was too embarassed to use the school bathroom stalls.

I would wait until someone flushed a toilet to "go".

I was 6.

I got over it.

hodeez

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 9:40 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

This reminds me of when I was too embarassed to use the school bathroom stalls.

I would wait until someone flushed a toilet to "go".

I was 6.

I got over it.

I think I did that until I was like 20 Can't Believe It

amother

Jasmine

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 9:44 pm

I don’t get it. I only make a sound when I pee.
And only sometimes. Never when I poop.
And I don’t care if I hear my husband or he hears me. Been like this since we were married a few months.
I don’t like hearing others or other people hearing me in public bathrooms.

amother

Goldenrod

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 9:51 pm

Hey Op
Eveeyone is incredulous. Ill take a moment and tell you that I was also incredulous at first but then thought about it and realized that you probably have deep shame around bathroom and probably some other personal stuff.
My idea for you would he to love yourself enough to be able to come to a point where you realize that you are lovingly human and have human needs and these needs are amazing and nothing to be ashamed of.

You are only uncomfortable with stuff that you are ashamed of.
Peeing and pooping and wiping sounds are human. Passing gas occasionally is not pleasant and is human too. Burping is not nice but happens occasionally.
Think of blowing your nose, digestive fluid noise and stomach grumbling.
I used to he embarrassed with all these. Im still embarrassed to eat at work or around strangers.
You will do your husband a world of good if you can come around and accept your human needs so that he starts feeling comfortable around you too.

amother

Babypink

Mon, Jan 30 2023, 11:50 pm

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