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Forum
-> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
-> Seminary Info
amother
Valerian
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Sun, Mar 05 2023, 12:03 pm
It’s so hard because no one wants to feel different. It hurts to actually be rejected. I was that girl. I was a good, frum girl and I was so hurt that other classmates were accepted but I wasn’t. I ended staying local. Aside for that one year of hearing how my friends were living it up in e’y, it didn’t affect my life in any way.
I actually told my daughters that I probably won’t want them to go to seminary in Israel. I know it’s what EVERYONE does but if you think about it, it’s really not necessary. I’m preparing my girls in advance before they have to deal with the peer pressure and disappointment.
They will go to sem. Just not in ey.
If Hashem has other plans for them.. I don’t know.
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MindOverMatter
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Sun, Mar 05 2023, 12:28 pm
Another thing to note, (not that it solves anything or makes it okay but . . . ) your beautiful DD is in good company. There are, unfortunately, hundreds of great girls this year that didn't get in. It's a numbers issue and not a quality-of-kid issue. I feel like, either a ton of new sems will have to open to keep up the pace and/or it will quickly become even more the norm that going to sem in EY is not a given. "Not getting in" is already no longer a stigma. And will definitely not effect shidduchim, etc. Everyone knows what the current situation is.
Power is definitely in numbers as is normalization. Please H"M, once the sadness lifts a little bit, it will hopefully feel more like, "we're all in this together club" and what's the next good option?
Last edited by MindOverMatter on Mon, Mar 06 2023, 12:43 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Clear
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Sun, Mar 05 2023, 12:33 pm
OP, I hope your daughter got into a good sem!
Not at all the same, but I was raised secular. In 12th grade I applied to 4 more selective colleges that I really wanted to get into, and to 1 "safety school" which accepted basically everyone. I only got accepted to the safety school.
I felt really sad and even insulted and ashamed at the time. Now (15 years later) all the bad feelings are gone. In fact, it didn't take long. I think even just 1 year later, I had moved on.
Wishing you the best ❤
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PinkFridge
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Sun, Mar 05 2023, 2:08 pm
amother Clear wrote: | OP, I hope your daughter got into a good sem!
Not at all the same, but I was raised secular. In 12th grade I applied to 4 more selective colleges that I really wanted to get into, and to 1 "safety school" which accepted basically everyone. I only got accepted to the safety school.
I felt really sad and even insulted and ashamed at the time. Now (15 years later) all the bad feelings are gone. In fact, it didn't take long. I think even just 1 year later, I had moved on.
Wishing you the best ❤ |
Not exactly the same but close enough. You get it.
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amother
Sapphire
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Sun, Mar 05 2023, 2:19 pm
amother OP wrote: | Wow. I came back intending to update and saw all the stuff people wrote mocking me for being concerned about my dd not getting into seminary. Unbelievable. If you only knew the other stuff going on in my life you would shrivel up in shame.
Never mind about updating, I won’t be posting again. What complete nastiness. |
I’m sorry OP, I reported the posts as soon as I saw them. Unfortunately, I did not see them before you did.
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amother
Holly
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Sun, Mar 05 2023, 2:37 pm
PinkFridge wrote: | Not exactly the same but close enough. You get it. |
Of course it's the same ! She got rejected too .
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PinkFridge
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Sun, Mar 05 2023, 4:42 pm
amother Holly wrote: | Of course it's the same ! She got rejected too . |
You know, you're right. But I don't think I'm terribly wrong. My point was, her experience allows her to appreciate it but there are some differences. For one, seminary is that year. In college, people often do the first two years at a community college and then go to the college of their choice. Or take gap years, et.
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amother
Freesia
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Tue, Jul 11 2023, 11:01 pm
OP, can you share a (hopefully) happy outcome?
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