Babysitters and internet in your house

ChutzPAh

Wed, Jun 18 2008, 10:51 pm

I never thought twice about this until reading that some members here lock up or put away their computers before having teenage babysitters over.
Do you ask permission from the parents if your babysitter is allowed to go online? Do you put it away?
Would you be upset if your child had access to the internet while babysitting or do you trust them?

AND....Do you check the history if they do go online?

flowerpower

Wed, Jun 18 2008, 10:59 pm

I used to close the light and door to the small office at the other end of the house when a babysitter came. They wouldn't even notice the room. Once we came home and I noticed the light to the room was open. I was surprised. I checked the whole history and was so upset what I saw. Poor mother thinking her kid is innocent and all. She went to websites I would hope no kids never know of. I had a password to aol but guess she had her own. Since then I have a password to my whole computer.

Maya

Wed, Jun 18 2008, 11:00 pm

The first time I had a teenage babysitter after I got my computer, my husband checked the history and he saw some very upsetting things. Since then, whenever I leave the house, I put away the router and shut off the internet connection. I leave some discs for them, like Jewish concerts and stuff, so they have what to do.

mummiedearest

Wed, Jun 18 2008, 11:17 pm

I only get babysitters who I know from pre-children days. I have known my babysitters since they were kids and trust them not to use my computer without my permission. I have had one babysitter who used my computer for her homework, but that was when I was home (she was more a mother's helper, and she only did it during quiet moments when it was obvious I didn't need her help). I really think it's inappropriate to be on the computer while babysitting anyway unless the kids are asleep. in which case, I consider my computer to be private property and if I find they use it without permission, they will not be babysitting for me anymore. I do not feel the need to lock it up.

mummiedearest

Wed, Jun 18 2008, 11:39 pm

it's not a question of letting or not letting. the only time I would LET is when they ASK. if they don't ask, I assume they don't use the computer. and if I find they've used it without permission, I will not hire them again. you are not their mother. if a mother calls to complain, you can lay down rules. BUT if you have to lay down rules for your babysitter's general behavior, I imagine she's not mature enough to watch your kids. so again, I don't see the issue.

Garden-Gnome

Wed, Jun 18 2008, 11:50 pm

I allow my sitters the use of the computer, I have a separate account for them and a passsword on DH and my accounts.
I do check the history when I get home. And the hidden history.
I have asked my sitter's mother what her house standards are and have mentioned that access to the computer is available. Her mother is not concerned.

Note: My sitters are highschool girls.

Shirley

Thu, Jun 19 2008, 12:05 am

Teenagers, mature or otherwise, are curious creatures.

Why give them easy access to things they are just starting to wonder about? I believe that my babysitters are good kids who truly want to do well. But do I need to place temptation under their noses?

I shut the router prior to their arrival.

mummiedearest

Thu, Jun 19 2008, 12:15 am

I understand they are curious. but if my computer is off, they should not turn it on out of curiousity. just as if your router is off they should not turn it on. it's one thing if your computer is on and logged on to the internet when they come, it's another if the computer is off and I know they brought homework with them.

Shirley

Thu, Jun 19 2008, 12:26 am

You're absolutely right mummie. But my computers are on at all times.

And for others like me, who keep their computers fired up every hour in the day, be realistic and know that if the baby sitter will be sitting in one room with a computer that is connected to the internet, they feel like they have an open invitation to find out - and finally see - all that they have been hearing about.

Let's not give them the opportunity.

amother

Thu, Jun 19 2008, 9:29 am

I babysat as a teenager, and I'd like to think I was very responsible and mature when it came to the kids. At the same time, this mother always had library books out that were...let's just say, they'd be rated at least R, perhaps some of them X? (I've never seen an X movie, so I wouldn't know.)

And yes, I read them. Maybe it was because I didn't have any concern for her personal property, maybe it was just because my yetzer hara was too strong and I thought "who would this be hurting?" But either way, I did it. And yes, I still remember scenes from those books today. And I'm NOT proud of it. I wish I could wipe those from my memory, but I can't. I'm in awe that this woman would keep those types of books lying around the house - I grew up modern, and I guess this was a "modern" home too, but I was often babysitting because SHE WAS AT A SHIUR of all things! Little did she know that while she was filling her mind with Torah, I was filling mine with...

Mummiedearest - you said that if you have to lay down rules for your babysitter, you would think she isn't responsible enough to babysit. I would beg to differ. I was a very responsible, caring, skilled babysitter, and I babysat for this family (as well as many others) for a good 5 or 6 years, sometimes on a very regular basis. She was very happy with me. I wasn't a "rebellious" kid, I wasn't someone you would imagine would read such things...but that doesn't make a difference. I was a teenager, I was bored, and there were these books lying around...I can't imagine internet would be any different.

yet

Thu, Jun 19 2008, 9:40 am

Depends on whom I use.
I ask them if they have a comp. at home, and what the policy is. One girl told me they don't have internet - just the parents do.

My regular babysitter, is someone I can trust. So I gave her the password. I have another girl who babysits sometimes, but I don't think I can trust her. So I let the screensaver go on, and she can try all she wants, but she can't get in. But I make sure to show her the videos I have available for her to watch (obviously Jewish.)
I also show her all my books, puzzles,....

If they have permission to go on, I do check after to see where they went.
If they don't, I'd know that they tried, bec. normally these ppl try to reboot computer, hoping to be able to bypass the password. But that doesn't help!
If someone I'm not sure about asks if they can use the internet, I tell them that they need to ask their mother. If she tells me no problem, then I don't have a problem. They seem to understand.

yo'ma

Thu, Jun 19 2008, 9:51 am

Shirley wrote:

yo'ma wrote:

I'm not their mother, they know what they can and can't do.

They're teenagers! And you're giving them free access to the adult book store and adult videos, (just to mention the extremes.) Would you want your child to be given that opportunity?

If their parents don't trust them or are concerned, they should ask the pple that their child is babysitting by, to not give them permission to use it. I have a tv and one of the things I tell the mother of the babysitter is that I have one, is that okay. If it's not, then they wouldn't babysit for me. Same idea as the computer.

dmmama

Thu, Jun 19 2008, 2:51 pm

Hmm... I honestly didn't even think twice about this. Maybe b/c the babysitter I use the most is the daughter of a lady in my office, so I see that she lets her go on the internet. But yes, I definitely say "here is the nosh, here is the guest account on the computer, here are the DVDs" and assume that she will not watch the movies or go on the websites that are not appropriate for her. We have gotten rid of most of our DVDs at this point, but maybe I should re-think this policy, or at least double-check with the parents.

The people I babysat for when I was in highschool were the same way - there was one time when I was online, and I clicked a link in the history that looked interesting, but turned out to be totally innapropriate. I got off the site as quickly as I could, and told the parents as soon as they came home, so that if they looked in the history, they wouldn't think it was me! As soon as I told them, they said they knew exactly who it was.