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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Giving Gifts
amother
OP
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 8:32 am
My son is learning mishnayos hoping to make a siyum at his bar mitzva.
What can we do for him or get him to celebrate this big achievement?
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amother
Ecru
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 8:38 am
amother OP wrote: | My son is learning mishnayos hoping to make a siyum at his bar mitzva.
What can we do for him or get him to celebrate this big achievement? |
How are you celebrating his bar mitzvah?
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amother
Bellflower
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 8:56 am
Mazel Tov! My son also had his Bar Mitzvah recently and made a siyum on all of mishnayos. Our "gift" to him is that we made a beautiful seudah/siyum for our family and his friends on his Bo Bayom. He did not expect a separate gift from us. The seudah/siyum is a big deal.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:14 am
We r planning a nice seuda for the bar mitzva.
He is not expecting anything for this siyum.
We are really proud of him & the goal he set for himself & we want to commemorate that.
Something besides the actual bar mitzva.
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amother
Narcissus
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:15 am
Would he appreciate a good quality bike? (like in the 800 range)
What's your budget? Maybe you can treat him to a trip to EY.
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amother
NeonGreen
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:23 am
A family member of mine recently had this and they brought out a special dessert table by bo bayom.
My son loved it so much that he requested it by his for his siyum.
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amother
Bone
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:42 am
My son is making a siyum at his BM too, it didn't occur to me to get him a separate gift as the whole BM event is already one big "gift".
But you got me thinking. Maybe it would be nice to do something a little extra. I like the idea of a special dessert / dessert table in addition to whatever is already being served.
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amother
Burlywood
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:49 am
What about a set of machzorim with his name or a set of mishnayes. I think sefarim more appropriate for bar mitzva present than a camera or bike
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amother
Oxfordblue
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 11:23 am
amother Burlywood wrote: | What about a set of machzorim with his name or a set of mishnayes. I think sefarim more appropriate for bar mitzva present than a camera or bike |
He'll be getting plenty of sforim as gifts.
Op, what is your budget here?
I think most people consider the entire party plus items bought for the boy for his wardrobe and tefilin PLUS all the gifts they get as a result of the party to be sufficient.
I would only supplement if I knew ds wanted something specific that he will not get as a gift anyway, and even then, I'd have to want to spend the $$$.
Alternatively, I might want to gift if ds is really not a learner and this was a big lift. In that case I would NOT buy a sefer!
If you want something small and heartfelt, to just put a bow on the entire milestone: I usually buy my sons a new siddur as part of this whole thing anyway (though they start to use it w their tefilin),, You can write a nice note inside, maybe upgrade to leather if you feel you must buy him a gift. Wrap it and hand it to him at the bo byom or right before.
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amother
Oxfordblue
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 11:29 am
amother Bone wrote: | My son is making a siyum at his BM too, it didn't occur to me to get him a separate gift as the whole BM event is already one big "gift".
But you got me thinking. Maybe it would be nice to do something a little extra. I like the idea of a special dessert / dessert table in addition to whatever is already being served. |
Here's the thing, will your son look at the sweet table as a special gift for his siyum accomplishment or just another aspect of this party (which I look at as already a gift for his accomplishments).
I love sweet tables, and have them myself but how would you convey to your son that it's a gift? Other than if you wouldn't have made one but he asked and you said, " you know what, I'm so proud of your siyum I'll add this on"
And if your next son does not make a siyum you won't have a sweet table? How will that go over?
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amother
Bone
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Wed, Mar 01 2023, 1:03 pm
amother Oxfordblue wrote: | Here's the thing, will your son look at the sweet table as a special gift for his siyum accomplishment or just another aspect of this party (which I look at as already a gift for his accomplishments).
I love sweet tables, and have them myself but how would you convey to your son that it's a gift? Other than if you wouldn't have made one but he asked and you said, " you know what, I'm so proud of your siyum I'll add this on"
And if your next son does not make a siyum you won't have a sweet table? How will that go over? |
He's my last BM iy"h so no next son jealousy. I wouldn't do a sweet table as I'm doing that anyway and it's not something for him. But I'm thinking maybe they bring out like a cake or something that says Mazel tov on your siyum.
Or maybe I won't do anything . My son is a strong learner and the fact that he's making a siyum on its own is exciting and accomplishing for him. I definitely wouldn't do a physical gift he'll get plenty of those from participants.
Just saying that this thread made me think.
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