When did you start making Pesach?

Hashem_Yaazor

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 6:43 am

In shana rishona, we cleaned and kashered our stove (not oven) and made a few chol hamoed meals. Not sure if that counts.
Married 5 years, 2 weeks postpartum, similar.
Married 11 years started making Pesach consistently and haven't gone away at all since then. And I host other relatives since that time.

amother

DarkYellow

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 6:43 am

Turned over the kitchen and kashered 2 months after getting married and made meals chol Hamed but went out for actual Yom tov meals. Did this every year. Year 6 stayed home for all meals- seder etc.

amother

Lightgreen

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 6:53 am

From the first year I had my own apt as a single. My sister who lived nearby hosted her aged inlaws, so they would move into my apt, I moved out and stayed at my parents, who also lived nearby, and my sister cooked and served all the YT meals in my apt. I didn't make the Sedarim but cooked for my parents in their apt. Really not a big fat hairy deal if you're used to helping your mother since childhood. A lot of work of course and you have to figure out what to do when and in what order, but not "OMG I can't do this and shouldn't have to till I'm 60."

amother

Azalea

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 7:35 am

Maybe the poster who likes having their own Seder just feels like it’s easier to get the kids to sleep in their own beds and be able to control the pace and the content of the Seders. FYI there is a Kabbalistic idea not to have relations the night of the Seder (I think) unless you are trying to conceive or don’t yet have a boy and a girl. I learned this the first year I was married - my husband had a whole list of nights like this (Rosh Hashana also).

amother

Daylily

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 7:40 am

amother DarkOrange wrote:

You are at least 40 and never made pesach? You still go to your parents?
How many kids do you have?
Wow!
I'm so curious how this works.

I’m 45 and only made pesach in 2020. BH we go away with my family typically

amother

Bisque

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 8:46 am

I voted 10-13 yrs

I did clean my home for pesach from first year. Both set of parents live locally, so I would just walk over for meals. Till 10 yr after wedding I had a tiny kitchen so nowhere to cook for pesach. I only had one child. I went from not even having a spoon for pesach and going out for every single meal including chol Hamad, even breakfast/lunch ( Ok I'd go to my mom and make it there, sometimes she wasn't even home, so not necessarily she doing it for us) to full fledged pesach with every single meal home including both sedarim once I moved. After 10 yrs of marriage.
I did help her with cooking or send my child to help.
If I moved in then I helped her with cooking, preps, setting table and clearing for other guests as well, that she hosted or if they just popped in to visit or for a meal.

amother

Gladiolus

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 8:49 am

I know you said covid doesn't count, but that was the first time we made Pesach and we've been making it every year since.

When we were first married, we used to go to our parents for every YT. Eventually we started staying home for some of them and inviting out families to come to us. But not Pesach. It always seemed so daunting to make Pesach from scratch. Then covid hit and we didn't have a choice. DH actually had to start making Pesach without me because I was sitting shiva. By the time I came home, he had already done a lot of the shopping. That whole time is a bit of a blur to me for various reasons but in the end we were able to look back and say we did it. And once we did it the first time it was no longer so daunting and we have continued to make Pesach ever since.

Oh, to answer the poll question, we were married 15 years before making Pesach the first time. However we're a family with just 3 kids and our families of origin are relatively small as well so we're not talking about huge crowds of people descending on our parents.

dankbar

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 8:52 am

As a single girl I used to do part of the pesach cleaning to help my mom plus my own room. For two weeks I'd do the pesach baking together with my aunt who was our guest with her family, for pesach, as my mom was working overtime before pesach, and I was off from school then. My mom would do the cooking, but I helped with the peeling.

amother

Buttercup

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 9:01 am

I voted 2-5 but truthfully exactly 1 year after I got married I came to my mother with a baby and ended doing a ton of cleaning and almost all the cooking for 20 people. So the next year I stayed in Israel, cleaned a tiny apartment with my brother and husband helping, and cooked for 3 people. It was wayyyyy easier!

ra_mom

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 10:30 am

Shana Rishona - during my 9th month, cleaned, turned kitchen over to pesach and stayed home and cooked during chol hamoed.
After that stayed home and went out for some meals for a couple of years.
Made our first Seder when we were married almost 4 years and have been fully home ever since.

Last edited by ra_mom on Sun, Mar 12 2023, 10:34 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Lily

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 10:40 am

I got married now. (I think it's my anniversary tonight.) Our first Pesach, we were married under a month, we were with our parents. Then we moved to Israel. My parents were going to get us tickets for Pesach but ILs didn't want to because they had 2 kids in shidduchim and would rather bring us in for weddings. So that got us started making Pesach from literally motzei shana rishona.

One BIL got married after Succos so a year and a half after our wedding, so we were there for Succos instead. A year later, SIL also got married right after Succos.

I made Pesach from then on, married 11 years, except for 2 years. One year, we went away for seder and then rented an apartment near family here in Israel and another year my BIL got married so we stayed.

There was another year when my brother got married, but my husband was in school so we didn't stay for Pesach. We came home from the wedding and made Pesach. I had a toddler and was in my first trimester.

So if I counted right this is my 9th time making Pesach. I'm married 11 years today.

amother

Lily

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 10:58 am

Oh and all the years I stayed home, I made seder.

To me, if I am going to make Pesach I better get to stay home for seder and not have my kids be second wheel at someone else's seder. (Except parents or ILs where they wouldn't be.) And sleep in their beds. And when I'm nursing a baby, I looooove being home and not missing the seder while I nurse the baby on the couch. I love putting my toddler to sleep and enjoying the seder. And the older kids can go to sleep right after...

paperflowers

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 11:08 am

I chose shana rishona based on your definition. I think we ate every single meal out (and if we were home, my mother probably sent the food!) but I couldn’t be staying in my own home and not have access to my kitchen. It was way easier because we had a tiny apartment and no kids!

SG18

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 3:55 pm

Since Shana rishona. We went away for first chag and Shabbat chol hamoed, but we've always preferred being home for chol hamoed.
We actually made the sedarim two years ago, and it was very nice. Planning on doing it this year (just one now) and really looking forward.

Edited to add: I forgot I was super pregnant that year! I was nervous about being far away from where I wanted to deliver, and knew I'd be more comfortable at home.

Last edited by SG18 on Mon, Mar 13 2023, 3:34 am; edited 1 time in total

farmom

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 5:00 pm

First year I cleaned my apartment but ate out. And had a baby that pesach
Then we moved on shlichus and not only do I make pesach for loads of guests, we host my in-laws Smile

Lots of years of making Pesach, and I love it bh

amother

Cerise

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 7:18 pm

ra_mom wrote:

Same almost word for word! Except I was 9 months pregnant also the second year. And one more year a few years later. That was a fun Pesach🤣 thank g-d for helpful husbands with flexible work schedules!! He worked the whole chol hamoed to make up for it but it was worth it. I always say I'm glad I didn't marry an accountant since I have a talent for being in my 9th month on Pesach.

amother

Aconite

Mon, Mar 13 2023, 3:17 am

2. Year after Wedding. ACtually Shana Rishona but without guests and we were invited for one seder the first year.
Since then EVERY YEAR FULL HOUSE, all extended family comes, we host for bochrim, friends, neighbors..whoever wants to join.
Its a LOOOOOT of work, but I start early, and I now have a pessach kitchen, allowing me to cook early.
I enjoy it. The only downside is MONEY. What other perople spend on 1 or 2 vacations we spend on pessach
WE LOVE PESSACH