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And we have to eat

Forum -> Household Management -> Finances

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amother

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 5:53 pm

I had a meeting with my ds school and they said he should see a psychiatrist $$$, get a tutor $$$, do some extra curricular activities $$$, and we have to pay for transportation to and from school $$$. Did I mention tuition $$$? We love our children and want to do what’s best for them, but doesn’t the school realize we also have to put food on our table????

Please don’t mention how important those things are. I didn’t say what we will or won’t be doing.

mha3484

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 5:55 pm

I would tell the school they are free to pay for it and then I would love to but you have to know your audience.

amother

Oak

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 5:56 pm

Can you do any of these things through insurance?

luckymom1

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 5:57 pm

School telling you aside, do YOU feel your child needs those things?

amother

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 6:58 pm

amother Oak wrote:

Can you do any of these things through insurance?

amother

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 6:58 pm

luckymom1 wrote:

School telling you aside, do YOU feel your child needs those things?

Some, not all.

amother

Mauve

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 7:02 pm

amother OP wrote:

Psychiatrist is covered by insurance usually.
What about low cost clinics?

We are suffering with similar. Kid needs OT etc all out of pocket (didn't qualify with insurance, one of the therapies he needs there is no one within an hour that is covered....). No low cost clinic near us because we don't have medicaid.

We asked for a tuition reduction and cited the thousands we have to pay for the help the kid needs as a reason.
I hope we get a little bit of a discount!!

amother

Whitesmoke

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 7:04 pm

Where do you live?

What insurance do you have?

amother

Hyacinth

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 9:17 pm

Public school.

Transportation is free. Free extra curricular activities in abundance. Free tutoring after school in abundance. Free tuition. Insurance should cover the psychiatrist and public school would never even SAY the word psychiatrist. Private school thinks it's their business to tell you what to do.

You can get limudei kodesh outside of public school hours (not free, but inexpensive) and get your child what YOU feel they need (not what an obnoxious school official says they need.

My opinion? Take your tution and your kid and go elsewhere. Public school is extreme, of course--- you might just find a better Jewish school fit out there.

amother

Lightcyan

Thu, Mar 23 2023, 9:26 pm

amother OP wrote:

I'm with you all the way, except for the transportation. Instead we pay for weekly therapy. Music lessons, swimming and sports, the gym, you name it. Some days when I pick him up I wonder how I'm going to Zelle the money to the music teacher because there's nothing in the account.
(I do tutoring. It's okay not to pay each time. I have parents that are up front with me and I keep track of the sessions until they can pay.)

amother

Fri, Mar 24 2023, 9:05 am

amother Hyacinth wrote:

I didn’t realize I came across that they were harsh. They weren’t. I don’t feel comfortable sending to a public school because of many reasons and one being I don’t think our hashkafa is strong enough to keep him from straying if he goes there.

dena613

Fri, Mar 24 2023, 9:16 am

Don't do public school.

I think you said insurance won't cover anything.
Are there clinics that could help you with a sliding scale?

Will the school provide or partially pay for the tutor? There are absolutely schools that will do that if you respectfully explain that you'd love to help dc and get the tutor but you don't know how you will be able to do it financially.

Is there a local chesed organization that can help subsidize anything?

Could you pickup kid from school instead of paying for transportation?

amother

Fri, Mar 24 2023, 9:41 am

dena613 wrote:

We don’t live in America or a place where they have organizations or government help. I highly doubt the school will do anything because we got a mail from them asking for everyone to please pay because they want to make sure all their teachers are paid before pesach. They don’t have much money. The school is far away and I can’t send to a closer school. It’s cheaper for me to pay someone to bring him home than me pick him up because of the hours I work.

Thank you all, but I wasn’t looking for solutions, just chizzuk or someone in a similar situation.

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