Traumatized | Imamother

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Traumatized

Forum -> Parenting our children -> Toddlers

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amother

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:18 pm

While my toddler was in the bath she slipped underwater for a second. It’s been 2/3 weeks since and she doesn’t want to hear of a bath. I’m trying not to force but I have her stand in the bath so I can freshen up. Is there anything I need to do or will the fear pass on its own with time?

Eselle13

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:33 pm

I've had this with my kids and it usually doesn't last past another bath or two.

Can you get her a non slip mat so she feels more secure?

Maybe a new exciting toy to play with in the bath and she'll forget to be afraid?

amother

Garnet

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:40 pm

This is normal. Trauma lasts for kids, just like for us.
Some homeopathy such as Aconite might help her with the recovery from the shock .
Take it slow. Watch her cues.
If she feels pressured, she may step back more.

Can you give her options? Bath or (handheld) shower?
If really not wanting either, can you sponge bathe her for now?

Good luck!

amother

Magenta

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:45 pm

I am having a similar experience with my 1yr old. He is fine in other bathtubs (at relatives house) but for the last 4 weeks refuses to go anywhere near our bath. He will start shrieking, he is so so traumatized and it’s heartbreaking.

Side note, can we not refer to it as drowned? That term is usually reserved for someone who passed away by drowning.

amother

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:49 pm

Eselle13 wrote:

The mat might be a good idea, thanks.
Got a new toy which helped somewhat but she still won’t sit or play calmly.

amother

Lightgreen

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:50 pm

Full disclaimer. I am a therapist but I'm not a specialist in this age. Still I have some thoughts I'd like to share. Trauma at this age is processed with the parents. So I would not take a child this age and put her in therapy, but you might want to speak to a therapist yourself to see what you can do to support her. What strikes me is your usage of the word " drowned" rather than just slipped underwater for a second. It sounds like you had a strong reaction to this experience, which affects your child. I'm not blaming you or trying to make you feel bad, it's not your fault either, but if you had a strong reaction it would register stronger in a child. So learning ways you can re-regulate can help both you and your child move past this. Those are my thoughts take it or leave it.

amother

Jasmine

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:53 pm

Can you put less water so maybe not as scary?

amother

Gardenia

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:55 pm

A session or 2 of EFT tapping can help release the trauma. I

amother

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:56 pm

amother Magenta wrote:

Edited

amother

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 9:57 pm

amother Lightgreen wrote:

I’m not the type that freaks easily but what you’re saying makes sense. Thanks for your insight.

Hashem_Yaazor

Tue, Apr 25 2023, 10:39 pm

Try having her go in the bath with no water and her clothing on. Get her used to the location in a safe way. Then without clothing but still no water. Just playing. Take it from there to see when you can add water again. Slowly build her confidence in the bath again.
Get bath crayons or whatever to help her want to go in as well.

I've been through this with a couple of kids and BH we made it through! (Not necessarily going underwater but slipping coming out of the bath, water going in the wrong place when washing hair, etc)

Hashem_Yaazor

Wed, Apr 26 2023, 5:40 pm

I forgot to add that you can also gradually introduce her back in the tub by holding her the whole time, then just her hand, then letting go completely...

mushkamothers

Wed, Apr 26 2023, 5:58 pm

Have you discussed this story with her? She's not too young to understand. Tell her the whole story. Act out her emotions including her fear. Pause for her to say "yes" or whatever words she knows. It won't re-traumatize her, it will give her words to process the experience.

#BestBubby

Wed, Apr 26 2023, 6:08 pm

Hashem_Yaazor wrote:

Great idea, get a non slip mat, or apply non slip decals.

1. Sit in tub, clothes on, toys to play

2. Sit in tub with just diaper, a big bin or pot full of water in tub, to play with water toys, sitting.

3. Same as above. Wash with wet cloth and soap.
Pour wash cups of water to rinse.

4. Start adding one inch warm water, sitting.

Gradually increase.

GiGichai

Wed, Apr 26 2023, 6:14 pm

I've gone into the bath with my traumatized child wearing a bathing suit for one or two baths. Usually that resolves it.

Pandabeer

Wed, Apr 26 2023, 6:59 pm

amother OP wrote:

I had the same with my toddler when she was a baby, I used energy healing to work on her, it took a few sessions and after a few weeks she loved going into the bath and swimming pool too

chocolate moose

Wed, Apr 26 2023, 9:45 pm

as an adult I wear shoes in the tub or when swimming. does she have anything she is secure in wearing? what a about a shower instead of a bath, even though she's young.

amother

Thu, Apr 27 2023, 8:21 am

Thanks everyone for replying with some great tips!

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