Asking others if nursing clean

amother

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:20 pm

is it acceptable to ask others if they nurse clean? think it s intrusive and rude ( inappropriate too because of its implication on a couples intimate life)

amother

Trillium

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:26 pm

I wouldn’t ask. I would just offer my own experience and they can give input on theirs or whatever
But usually it’s because we are taking about nursing and having babies etc. so it’s all in context of the conversation
But no I would never ask them “do you nurse clean”

But again if it’s in context idk if it’s so wrong to ask someone. But it’s just not what I find right to ask.

Ema of 5

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:26 pm

amother OP wrote:

is it acceptable to ask others if they nurse clean? think it s intrusive and rude (and inappropriate too because of its implication on a couples intimate life)

I think it would depend on the context of the conversation and the relationship between the asker and the mom, but generally I don’t think it’s acceptable.

happy chick

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:36 pm

Sometimes you don't have to ask. When someone has children less than 18 months apart, you just know.

amother

Cognac

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:47 pm

happy chick wrote:

Sometimes you don't have to ask. When someone has children less than 18 months apart, you just know.

I nursed clean for a year. My MIL nursed clean for 2 years with each of her 10 kids. Less than 18 months apart sounds like not nursing clean, just not getting pregnant immediately.

amother

Royalblue

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:48 pm

I wouldn’t ask unless it would come up in conversation.
I don’t mind if someone asks me while we are talking except one person I don’t want to tell.

zaq

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:53 pm

Yes, it's rude and intrusive. It's not anyone's business. Even if "everyone" asks.

amother

Caramel

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:54 pm

I wouldn't ask. It's very much in the myob category.
Maybe is a close friend or sister would complain about staining I would follow up with a comment like hope you are not struggling with that any more or did things straighten out.

amother

Oak

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:56 pm

amother OP wrote:

is it acceptable to ask others if they nurse clean? think it s intrusive and rude ( inappropriate too because of its implication on a couples intimate life)

No its not acceptable to ask.
No its not an implication on a couples intimate life. *after my youngest, we weren't intimate until he was 1, due to sb issues.

amother

Goldenrod

Mon, May 01 2023, 4:57 pm

It’s really not ok to ask! But I feel society forgot what etiquette is. Don’t ask me if I’m on birth control or how many kids I’m having or if I’m nursing clean etc.

I had a friend she was horrified her friend asked her if her daughter was nursing clean she was like I would dare ask my daughter it’s just not ok!

zaq

Mon, May 01 2023, 5:11 pm

amother Narcissus wrote:

I think it’s rude and intrusive even to ask of someone is nursing

So do I, and was told I'm a prude for saying so. That didn't change my mind. I'll never forget when my dad's friend asked me if my sister was nursing after she had a baby! How is this ANY of his business?

amother

Oleander

Mon, May 01 2023, 5:32 pm

Extremely rude.

amother Cognac wrote:

I nursed clean for a year. My MIL nursed clean for 2 years with each of her 10 kids. Less than 18 months apart sounds like not nursing clean, just not getting pregnant immediately.

I’m not sure what you’re trying to say. I nursed clean for 15 months with my first kid but another kid wasn’t a good nurser so I only nursed clean for 9 months, and got pregnant right away, so my kids are 18 months apart. 9 months is still nursing clean.

PS yes I use birth control now. But I have never been asked that irl and I have been asked about nursing clean so 🤷‍♀️

amother

Canary

Mon, May 01 2023, 5:43 pm

If you typically talk about your periods and cycle lengths then I would say it’s ok. Otherwise no.

lamplighter

Mon, May 01 2023, 5:57 pm

I've heard it asked in conversations about BC, do you nurse clean, or oh I nurse clean...
I've never heard it being asked of a person while they were nursing or out of context of such a conversation.

amother

Papayawhip

Mon, May 01 2023, 5:57 pm

" it will excuse you for asking if you excuse me for not answering"

amother

Azalea

Mon, May 01 2023, 6:11 pm

happy chick wrote:

Sometimes you don't have to ask. When someone has children less than 18 months apart, you just know.

Huh? Maybe they nursed clean for 9 months?

Many people start getting their period back one their kid goes on solids and starts nursing a little less frequently.