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-> Children's Health
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amother
OP
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 Thu, Jun 01 2023, 11:34 am
I used to use a dentist for my kids who did not allow any adults in the back with the kids. I refused to go back there with my little ones.
Now I use another dentist who did not allow me in last time, but they sometimes do allow parents in. One time they allowed me in the room if I would stand in the corner and not talk.
This dentist prefers to put kids to sleep to fill their cavities. I guess that's the way to make more money. If parents don't want to do anesthesia, they're willing to try it without but if the kid screams, they refuse to continue.
Today they tried to convince me that they should put my 3 year old to sleep because they have never succeeded in filling cavities without anesthesia for that age. 3 year olds don't tolerate the Novocain shot. They said they could try, but what is my back up plan if she doesn't tolerate it? She has 5 cavities, which is not a reason to put anyone to sleep.
I asked what they mean by not tolerating it. I said I'm sure she'll cry for a minute by the injection, they have to let me be in the room to hold her hand, and then she'll be fine. They insisted we need a backup plan.
Then for my 14 year old: he has a lot of cavities. They want to pull out an adult tooth because it has a big cavity.  And they want to put him to sleep because it will be easier for him to get all his cavities filled all at once! 
I told them anesthesia is 90% of death. The dentist seemed to think it was a funny joke.
So we need another new dentist. Sigh. Why do we have such weird dentists?
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amother
Lemonchiffon
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 11:40 am
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Your 14 year old doesn't need a pediatric dentist.
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chick567
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 11:47 am
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you need another dentist. you need a dentist that is a nice caring person, he doesnt have to be a pediatric one.
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amother
Marigold
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 12:19 pm
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Where are you located? Perhaps we can give you recommendations. Agreed with the others that a 14 year old certainly does not need a pediatric dentist. We use a regular dentist for everyone - kids and adults and everyone is happy
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amother
Almond
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 12:21 pm
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I would switch. Our dentist even allows my kid to lay on us while being worked on. I would not tolerate not being allowed back there or automatically putting kids to sleep.
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Thisisnotmyreal
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 12:22 pm
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Look for a biological dentist in your area.
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sarahmalka
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 12:26 pm
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Yeah those are weird experiences you've had. Never ever had a dentist insist on anything you're saying.
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amother
Oldlace
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 12:28 pm
You need another dentist.
I would stay far away from anyone who prefers to use anesthesia.
I actually agree with not allowing parents in the room for kids beyond say age 4-5, I find the do better than with mom there but you need nice caring staff for this to work.
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asmileaday
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 12:30 pm
| amother Almond wrote: | | I would switch. Our dentist even allows my kid to lay on us while being worked on. I would not tolerate not being allowed back there or automatically putting kids to sleep. |
This!
I'm shocked that this can be standard care somewhere.
My kids were never put to sleep for fillings. The most they got was laughing gas. And not allowing anyone in with the child? That's so traumatic.
Once when my son was 5 he needed a tooth pulled and the oral surgeon insisted on sedation and he was so nasty about it. I did it that one time but never went back. And even that wasn't anesthesia.
Pediatric dentists need to be able to tolerate some degree of discomfort in kids. This isn't normal.
I used to use a fabulous pediatric dentist when my kids were little. She would let me hold them on my lap and have them lay on me if needed.
She once even did a small filling without any numbing at all because that's what my son requested. And it was fine.
Last edited by asmileaday on Thu, Jun 01 2023, 1:15 pm; edited 1 time in total
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asmileaday
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 12:31 pm
| amother Oldlace wrote: | You need another dentist.
I would stay far away from anyone who prefers to use anesthesia.
I actually agree with not allowing parents in the room for kids beyond say age 4-5, I find the do better than with mom there but you need nice caring staff for this to work. |
No way. My kids were always comforted by holding my hand and squeezing it when needed, at any age. Why would anyone want to deny them that?
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boysrus
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 12:39 pm
I used to go to a pediatric dentist like this. also insisted on putting the child to sleep for fillings. I refused and moved to a different dentist. the child was 4. like just turned 4. new dentist was calm and patient. it took a few different appts but we got it all done in the end.
go with your gut OP. change dentists.
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amother
Catmint
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 1:28 pm
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That is crazy. We don't use a pediatric dentist, but rather a family dentist. He's amazing with my kids and often fills cavities without Novocain if it's not too deep. The most they will do is use laughing gas if it's really bad or the kid is very anxious.
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amother
Aquamarine
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 1:29 pm
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Where do you live? This is not my experience at all. My kids dentist is fabulous and of course I’m In the room with them!
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amother
Dill
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 1:32 pm
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OP, do these dentists take Medicaid? If yes, when it comes to dentists, you get what you pay for.
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amother
Outerspace
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 1:43 pm
| amother Oldlace wrote: | You need another dentist.
I would stay far away from anyone who prefers to use anesthesia.
I actually agree with not allowing parents in the room for kids beyond say age 4-5, I find the do better than with mom there but you need nice caring staff for this to work. |
Just like I wouldn’t leave my kid alone in the room with a pediatrician, I wouldn’t leave my kid alone in the room with a dentist. I have never been to a dentist who didn’t allow parents into the room. I had one assistant who wanted to talk to my 15 year old son alone, and after making sure it was ok with him, I insisted on being there. She wanted to talk to him about how some of his habits are unhealthy, and thought either maybe I didn’t know about them or he would be embarrassed. I told her in the future she should please not speak to my children without me present.
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amother
Junglegreen
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 2:44 pm
| amother Outerspace wrote: | | Just like I wouldn’t leave my kid alone in the room with a pediatrician, I wouldn’t leave my kid alone in the room with a dentist. I have never been to a dentist who didn’t allow parents into the room. I had one assistant who wanted to talk to my 15 year old son alone, and after making sure it was ok with him, I insisted on being there. She wanted to talk to him about how some of his habits are unhealthy, and thought either maybe I didn’t know about them or he would be embarrassed. I told her in the future she should please not speak to my children without me present. |
It is very standard practice to talk to teens about risky behaviors without parents in the room. If you’re worried about her giving him an education he didn’t already have, that I could see. Other than that there’s nothing wrong with what she did.
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amother
Almond
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 2:59 pm
| amother Dill wrote: | | OP, do these dentists take Medicaid? If yes, when it comes to dentists, you get what you pay for. |
I had phenomenal dentists on Medicaid. My current non Medicaid one is no where as good as the 3 Medicaid ones so…
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amother
OP
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 3:12 pm
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Yes, these are medicaid dentists. I wasn't expecting them to be as good as others, but not like this!
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tweety1
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 3:47 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | Yes, these are medicaid dentists. I wasn't expecting them to be as good as others, but not like this! |
I've never heard such a thing. My kids dentist even does root canals on Abby teeth. Dr. Zelman on 18th Ave.
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amother
Butterscotch
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Thu, Jun 01 2023, 3:47 pm
I would switch dentist! This is horrible! Not letting a parent in????
Besides, I would be weary of any dentist finding too many cavities.
A few months ago, I took my 7 year old to a pediatric dentist. They told me my son had 14 cavities and they would only do the work if they use laughing gas. I wasnt too confortable with it so I asked my regular dentist if he would see my son. He only found 2 small cavities which he treated in one short apointment. This is not the first time this has happened to me. Considering that we are very on top of brushing teeth and taking our kids for dental checkups, and limiting candies, I dont expect my kids to have too many cavities. I would find it surprising if a 3 year old already has 5 cavities.
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