Help! I can't take care of both myself and baby!

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Infants

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GetReal

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 6:21 pm

Could your baby be overtired? That leads to nursing for comfort but what they really need is sleep.

amother

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 6:53 pm

GetReal wrote:

Could your baby be overtired? That leads to nursing for comfort but what they really need is sleep.

Totally possible but what can I do about it? Almost every time I put him to sleep (including nursing him to sleep) he pops right back up!

Tzutzie

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 7:00 pm

Lots of good advice here....
Not much to ads.
Just one thing, does he burp well?
Oscar it hard to get a burp out? It could be he's constantly having gas churning in his little tummy.
Try mylicon. It had been a LIFE SAVER for me.
I buy a bottle in my 9th month together with diapers wipes and gripe water.

amother

Wine

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 8:44 pm

Op I was you a few weeks ago!

First of all not all lactation consultants are equal.
The first one I went to was totally unhelpful she just said make sure baby has good latch and give it time. I went to another one as I was soo frustrated and ready to drop nursing because my baby was eating all day but never satisfied she also wasnt really interested in bottles. She said there was partial ties, we had them snipped and there was major improvement in her efficiency at nursing.

She was still gassy and very unsettled/fussy. Ask your dr but my lactation consultant recommended I give 1.2 ml of mylanta before each feeding and see if there was improvement to rule out reflux. It really improved and now moved on to low dose of reflux meds. I finally feel like I'm getting my life back.

Good Luck and feel good!

amother

DarkKhaki

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 10:04 pm

OP this sounds like me with one of my kids he was always in my hands and always latched on! I ate my meals with him on the Bobby pillow latched on... I thought he was crying from hunger turned out it was reflux. He was crying for more food cuz the nursing calmed the reflux while he was at it. He didn't bring up his milk which is why it took me so long to get him onto antacids. Babies with reflux tend to wretch and sort of push their bodies up from their stomach.

Tight fists and stomach arched up and watching upwards are signs of reflux.

I'm 15 years past this and still remember, it's hard

Hatzlacha

amother

Papaya

Fri, Sep 22 2023, 10:07 am

I had a 2 babies like this these are what helped.

Also make sure for all babies you are eating right to have quality milk. First the mother has to eat to help baby. Soups I find are very easy. Of you have any relatives eruv yom tov now that could spare a container soup it so easy to defrost and eat along with hard boiled egg and whole wheat roll yogurt. All foods with almost zero prep time

Op said she can see her baby grow bigger. Unfortunately my bigger baby went throug 2 growth spurts between 1-2 months each growth spurt took a week or 2 of just eating around the clock followed by a week of sleeping extra long-it was in that time that I would check on the baby to make sure he's OK. But after that his clothes wouldn't fit and he looked like he grew. The baby was a very hungry baby to begin with

Second baby was a snacker but also sensory-so would get overestimated, overtired and needed food as comfort for this baby. Also baby always has sleep issues A swing with music- (not something I needed to push) was the answer. She fell asleep in the swing but if the swing stopped she would wake up. We borrowed seats from gemachs first to test out the one she got the best sleep in. Also for this type of kid I would put a drop of water or milk on the pacifier that's all she needed to go back to sleep.

Babies also would cluster eat in the afternoon. This is the time my kids came home so I needed creativity. They would eat straight for hours and go until the am. After a certain hour I made the room completely black and baby ate in the dark. And tried to stick the pacifier in and swaddle as much as possible. This was very good for the overestimated baby and the hands would wake her up if she wasn't swaddled.

These reasons sound to be your babies issues.
For other issue
I gave a little water mixed with camomile tea after eating
Water mixed with prune juice for constipated babies.
And had the baby stretched a few times

Also some babies need more burping and that's why they wake up.

amother

Papaya

Fri, Sep 22 2023, 10:12 am

The swaddle is very important and could happen when you transfer him from your own hands or when he's asleep unswadled it's called the moro reflux

amother

Fri, Sep 22 2023, 12:36 pm

Thanks everyone. I'm taking it all in. Some of your babies really sound like mine!

The reflux thing - would it be related to burps and gas?

I got used to (in like just a couple of days) baby falling asleep around 11pm for a few hours. Last night he totally skipped that. Fell asleep maybe 2ish. Then he (we) slept all morning with only brief sleepy nursing breaks and woke up just in time for carpool pickup. So basically despite all my resolutions the only thing I ate today so far was chocolate covered nuts in the car again because when I got home my attention got hijacked. Oh and corn chips, the car had corn chips too. Gonna work on having a good lunch now because baby fell asleep again. He's catching up on a couple of hellish days but I can't join him, too much to do today. Anyway I also bought some energy drinks hoping to bring up my hydration before Yom Kippur (and in general) but now I have a headache from the sugar.

I literally can't win at this. I'm kind of terrified for Yom Kippur.

giftedmom

Fri, Sep 22 2023, 12:39 pm

amother OP wrote:

Sounds like the tail end of a growth spurt. And energy drinks are not good for YK, they will dry you out, you need electrolyte drinks.

amother

Fri, Sep 22 2023, 1:34 pm

giftedmom wrote:

Sounds like the tail end of a growth spurt. And energy drinks are not good for YK, they will dry you out, you need electrolyte drinks.

Well I'm done with shopping but I think the one I got has electrolytes. In past fast days I did well drinking Gatorade before and after but I found right next to the Gatorade this coconut water thing with a whole list of vitamins. I drank one already and will have another later.

Bh baby slept through 2 eggs, avocado, and most of a glass of water. Then he settled for a sister while I shoved chicken in the oven that is still half frozen and can only pray to be done before Shabbos. I still have a headache and am falling asleep after the wreck that was last night (anyone know why a smoke alarm would go off two different times with nothing going on?? The full smoke signal - 3 beeps, repeatedly. We were ready to evacuate just in case there was like something inside the walls or whatever but the alarm stopped and time passed with nothing to see or smell. Then it happened again, stopped again, and didn't start again. We're kind of disturbed. Also tired.)

amother

Skyblue

Fri, Sep 22 2023, 2:27 pm

A smoke alarm can go off if there's dust inside, or a bug got inside. Or if a balloon bumped into it.

amother

NeonYellow

Sat, Sep 23 2023, 7:17 pm

As a mother of almost two month old twins, I learned fast that they will cry sometimes and I can't help them and that's okay.
I ALWAYS get myself something to eat/drink before sitting down to nurse them. They will cry while that is happening. oh well.

amother

Sat, Sep 23 2023, 9:25 pm

I've been prioritizing eating and drinking more but I still feel hungry, thirsty, and weak a lot of the time and I'm actually scared for Yom Kippur Sad

like scared for real. I sent the kids to my parents so the only one I need to take care of is the baby, and I plan to stay home and take it easy the whole time, but I still don't see how I'm going to survive. Taking care of the baby is draining enough.

I think he does probably have reflux. I'm going to talk to his doctor about it right after yk. Meanwhile I don't think there's anything I can do Sad

amother

Clear

Sat, Sep 23 2023, 10:26 pm

Call a rav. He might suggest shiurim or IV and/or at which symptom to just break fast.

amother

Vanilla

Sat, Sep 23 2023, 10:51 pm

amother OP wrote:

I've been prioritizing eating and drinking more but I still feel hungry, thirsty, and weak a lot of the time and I'm actually scared for Yom Kippur Sad

Would your doctor prescribe reflux medication over the phone tomorrow so you can still fill it and start it before y"k?
I just started my 7 week old on it. Can't say for sure it's helping yet but I'm hoping it'll make a difference.
I also bought this
Little Remedies Gas Relief Drops | Natural Berry Flavor | 1 oz. | Pack of 1 | Gently Works in Minutes | Safe for Newborns https://a.co/d/9haMQuw
If there's a Target near you they should have it. Or really any pharmacy.
My pediatrician also recommended this
Gerber Good Start, Baby Probiotic Drops, Soothe, 0.34 Ounce https://a.co/d/7dzRR9S
I bought something similar.

I'm so sleep deprived, willing to try anything!

amother

Papaya

Sun, Sep 24 2023, 5:36 am

Studies have shown reflux medication comes with long term side effect or side effects that only come out later in life.

If you need it for your sanity go ahead with the dr permission. But not all dr are aware and some dr give out medicine more freely than others.

Before going to the Dr nurse your baby, burp your baby. Burp baby again a little. I find the best way is to hold baby in sitting position, support baby's head while pressing simultaneously on there chest and back. Dr should listen then to the babies lungs and decide if his reflux is severe enough. Some babies just need alot of burping, that's very time consuming but not a good enough reason to give a newborn unnecessary medication. If he needs it go ahead q

amother

Green

Tue, Sep 26 2023, 7:57 am

How did you make it through op?

I hope things get easier and that you have a joyous succos

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