S/o shoe free | Imamother

amother

Broom

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 11:23 am

watergirl wrote:

I’m really wondering why the shoes off culture people are not more cognizant of the fact that other people might have issues with their feet and it causes of physical pain to not have their shoes on? For that it might cost them actual embarrassment if they have a foot odor issue, or holes in their socks?

Many of us get it. I don’t make adult visitors take their shoes off. But my floors are definitely dirty when they leave.

amother

Babyblue

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 11:23 am

Out of curiosity, do people who maintain a shoe free home never have pets?

My cats keep themselves very clean, but they don't remove their paws whenever they come in!

amother

Tan

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 11:27 am

amother Petunia wrote:

It’s interesting that Toronto keeps coming up. I wonder why. There are a lot of other large and small frum communities where it snows in the winter. Im thinking either there are a large proportion of Torontonians on imamother or people there care a lot about how their homes look. This is the second time I read that Rebbes and Roshei Yeshiva take their shoes off and each time I cringed. If a Rebbe or Rosh Yeshiva walked into my house and he took his shoes off at my door I’d be so uncomfortable. When the state of our carpets is a higher priority than respecting others maybe our own culture is a little weird.

Torontonian. People remove overshoes or exchange boots for shoes. If the Rebbes and Roshei Yeshiva are comfortable in socks - that's on them.

amother

Emerald

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 11:29 am

For people who are all in for this but need to wear shoes of some kind, do you bring your crocs or Birkenstocks or whatever to other people's houses when you pop in?

Do you assume a guest who doesn't didn't realize, didn't care, or that they can't?

amother

Cobalt

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 11:43 am

amother OP wrote:

Ha. I have a rack of cubbies in the front hall closet which you literally have to walk past to get from the front door into the house. But nope.

We have a box for shoes by the door. it's easier to kick them off and throw in the shoe bin and no one finds it bothersome to look for pairs in the morning. I was always yelled about not putting she shoes neatly on the mat as a kid, and so I just got rid of the whole equation by not subjecting myself to the neatnes. A bin is also confined enough that it doesn't bother the eye too much.
Bonus if it has a lid, though the shoes end up on top instead of inside...

amother

Cobalt

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 11:49 am

amother Emerald wrote:

I grew up in a no shoe culture in Europe. Some people have extra slippers available or you would use the ones of a family member who isn't expected home.
If you really have to wear shoes, I knew of one family who had the blue shoecovers, but that's rare.

amother

Iris

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 11:52 am

I grew up in a shoe free culture, as did DH, and we don't even think about it. Shoes come right off out of habit as soon as I walk in and change into slippers.

I don't make visitors remove their shoes though, if they don't want to.

amother

Dimgray

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 11:55 am

To me it's common sense- you come in, you take off your shoes. Shoes are dirty. The ground outside is gross. People here spit all over, relieve themselves, dump who knows what. I don't want that tracked onto my floors.
I don't burden guests with my rules though. I have shoe racks by the front door and shoes never get lost or in the way.

amother

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 12:36 pm

amother Mocha wrote:

Yes I have, especially because I don’t force adults

Ok. I would think that with an indoor mat and an outdoor mat for people to wipe before entering, if the shoes have no visible dirt, they wouldn't be tracking in dirt. Germs are a different story.

amother

Crimson

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 12:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

I have never heard this term, as a "thing". I'm aware that certain cultures and ethnicities do not wear shoes inside for religious or cultural reasons. I know one frum individual who is concerned about stains on her living room carpet, so she has her kids take off their shoes.

Outside of that, can someone explain this to me? Do you think that shoes will scratch your wood floors? Do you think it tracks germs and household members are more likely to get sick if people coming inside the house don't remove their shoes?

I think also similar reason why someone may change their clothing if they’ve been on the subway seat or other public seats/ park benches before sitting on their own couches/ bed. It’s gross you don’t know what germs and bacteria you’re bringing it. But like you aren’t gonna tell your guest to change lol you wouldn’t know where they’ve sat before coming to you. Food for thought.

Wolfsbane

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:05 pm

For shoe-free households: please provide your guests with slippers of some kind! Your living room floor might be clean, but your bathroom and kitchen floor might not be! (And some people aren't comfortable walking around in say, bare feet or stockings)

amother

Emerald

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:08 pm

amother Cobalt wrote:

Interesting. I know I can only wear the shoes that work for my feet- what would happen if someone with size 11 or wide feet came to a house where the people have smaller or narrow? Also, I know I would slide and slip on a floor (vs carpet) with shoe covers. I would have to keep a pair of slippers/crocs with me everywhere I went, I guess.

Cheiny

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:40 pm

imaima wrote:

Absolutely not. If you live in a place where people do it, it’s not a „rule“, it’s a way of the world. Absolutely everyone takes off their shoes, including dignified people. The idea to keep their shoes on doesn’t enter the brains of even most dignified people. Many many people carry their own change of shoes with them if they want to stay dignified.

If you look at the wording, there’s a need there that goes beyond “it’s the norm where I live.”

amother

Peachpuff

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:40 pm

amother OP wrote:

Ok. I would think that with an indoor mat and an outdoor mat for people to wipe before entering, if the shoes have no visible dirt, they wouldn't be tracking in dirt. Germs are a different story.

After multiple people have used the mats during the day, they really don’t help much. Besides there is also dirt on the sides of shoes, that doesn’t get wiped on the mat

imaima

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:41 pm

amother Emerald wrote:

Do you do tons of walking in other people’s houses? It is assumed that people land on the couch and take a short trip to a bathroom at most.

amother

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:44 pm

amother Peachpuff wrote:

After multiple people have used the mats during the day, they really don’t help much. Besides there is also dirt on the sides of shoes, that doesn’t get wiped on the mat

Talking about visible dirt that can be tracked, yes you can see if the bottoms and sides of shoes are clean.

Cheiny

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:45 pm

imaima wrote:

As stated in the other thread, I come from a shoe-free culture. It is understood that the street is dirty, shoes are dirty, they track germs into home and undo all the cleaning. This goes hand in hand with pedestrian culture- a lot of walking - and a climate with a lot of rain and snow.

That’s what mats are for.

Cheiny

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:48 pm

amother Tan wrote:

Torontonian. People remove overshoes or exchange boots for shoes. If the Rebbes and Roshei Yeshiva are comfortable in socks - that's on them.

Wow, I can’t even picture that. To me it would seem not ba’kavodig to see a Rebbe or RY walking around in his socks… way too informal too.

amother

Emerald

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:48 pm

imaima wrote:

Do you do tons of walking in other people’s houses? It is assumed that people land on the couch and take a short trip to a bathroom at most.

I might be there for a Shabbos meal and be up helping in the kitchen and bringing food. I might need to chase after my kids, or go back and forth to the basement or backyard where they are. (How does that work, if your shoes are in front? Do you carry them to the back and put them on?)

Cheiny

Tue, Oct 03 2023, 1:50 pm

imaima wrote:

Do you do tons of walking in other people’s houses? It is assumed that people land on the couch and take a short trip to a bathroom at most.

When people come for a Seuda, they have to walk through the house, to the dining room, the kitchen to wash, possibly bathroom, perhaps afterwards to the living room, etc.