Realistic expectations - chores

justforfun87

Mon, Jan 15 2024, 8:21 pm

I know there are some families where kids are washing floors by age 4 but for the rest of us what is a reasonable expectation for children ages 7-10? I feel like I become exasperated asking for their help to clean up after themselves. Not sure where I went wrong. I ask nice and then I ask not nice at all
If they do agree to help it is usually with them screaming that the other one isn't helping at all.
I do have an older son who just naturally is agreeable and always is willing to help, with just one ask.
They will help set the table and bring their dirty plates in. They also will throw clothing in hamper when reminded but that's about it. The rest is done with me begging or raising my voice.

amother

Steelblue

Mon, Jan 15 2024, 8:25 pm

I’m also frustrated and decided the only way to go is ground up.
So I’m working on getting kids to clear up after themselves after every single meal and after the Shabbos seuda to help clear the general table.
Once I got that foundation I can get more going.
I’d also like to focus on dividing laundry into light dark.

amother

NeonOrange

Mon, Jan 15 2024, 8:47 pm

I've had a job wheel for many years. It's easy to make. Take 2 colors of card Stock and get one of those push pins that turn. Make 2 circles.... one bigger / one smaller.
Divide into 3/4/5 cleaning areas and them on inside write names of kids. Each night they turn the wheel. Jobs after dinner. U can make some sort of reward for everyone who's done it by the end of the week if you want...
Recently ... my kids have gotten older and they choose to do each the same job every night... ( maybe switching every month or so...) that way if you do your job one night... the next night it may not be as hard....

Try to be loving and firm and that it's not negotiable. Harder to do with younger kids but maybe about 8 and up can do this without help.
( younger kids.. u may have to help them or do with them,...or maybe they have to do something in their room etc....)
Once it becomes a real routine they tend to fight you on it less.
Hatzlocha!