Involving Students in Fundraising

amother

Thu, Jan 25 2024, 6:36 am

My son's Yeshiva has set various goals for their students for the annual fundraiser. There is no requirement to participate- but there is pressure in the form of prizes. The goals seem large- minimum $500 per middle school student. I'm happy for my son to participate in a fundraiser on some level- but this feels excessive to me. He should be focused on schoolwork and normal middle school activities in my opinion. I didn't grow up going to frum schools so perhaps I'm not getting the full picture. I'd feel more comfortable with an older hs school student or bochur- this feels somewhat inappropriate for 12- and 13-year-olds. This is not a wealthy community- but not poor either. Thoughts?

amother

Hotpink

Thu, Jan 25 2024, 7:40 am

I really dislike it immensely. I feel it's unfair and unsafe. It also creates unhealthy dynamics in the class. It's not my kids fault that they live in a modest neighborhood and that they don't have wealthy relatives or family friends.
OP, consider yourself lucky. In many places the fundraising and amounts are mandatory.

amother

Navy

Thu, Jan 25 2024, 9:35 am

I hated it for years. Those stupid junk prizes that broke in a second were the worst of all and I always ended up paying the minimum amount per kid from my own pocket so my child could get a prize.

But my sons' yeshiva changed it up recently. They do the totals not by individual child, but by class totals. So the class together wins something like an ice cream party or a class trip and even if one kid brings $20 and another brings $500, they all work together to benefit. Instead of being jealous of that one rich kid, they are excited and happy for him to bring in $$, because they are all in it together. To me, they finally got it right.

keym

Thu, Jan 25 2024, 9:46 am

amother Navy wrote:

I disagree.
Maybe this can work on the high school level.
But in middle elementary school, it gives an opportunity for taunting, bullying, and anxiety for the more socially awkward kid.

If my child can't reach his whatever $100 goal, then that's something I help him with. Maybe privately treat him or keep him home the day the prizes are given out.
But if it's a class thing, if the class comes in short, then that's an opportunity to point fingers at those who didn't or couldn't step up. I've had children freaking out because they only collected $20 and now the whole class will be angry at them and it will be his fault that the class doesn't get the pizza or trip or whatever. And I can't step in. If it was just him, I can offer to buy his own pizza. But if my son doesn't collect, either because we don't know people who give, he's too awkward to call people, or we already maxed out on relatives donations for other causes, I can't offer pizza for the entire class to keep the popular boys or the "class kings" from teasing.

B'Syata D'Shmya

Thu, Jan 25 2024, 6:52 pm

amother OP wrote:

Since there is no requirement, I dont understand the "goal". Feels like double speak - they cant force the kids to fund raise, but highly encourage and reward it. Message being - we like you better if you fundraise for us. And the more you raise, the higher your value. Children are learning they are not all equal in the schools eyes.

Its not really a problem for you, as you dont mind your son participating.

The prizes are usually donated so this is like a chinese auction.

I had been told it helps the kids feel vested in, and responsible for the mossad they are learning in.

When can I get my kid to fundraise for our home expenses for which he totally is just as vested in and responsible for? Very Happy

amother

Hydrangea

Thu, Jan 25 2024, 9:17 pm

I think it's exploiting children.
My son's yeshiva made a "call center" for them during school hours. (Recess and lunch)
I was more okay with this because
A- it was voluntary. Whoever wanted to did it, whoever didn't, didn't.
B- it was not they're own contacts. It was a list the yeshiva gave them. So it wasn't personal
C- there was no goal or incentive, so there was no pressure

All in all, I was actually proud of my son. It pushed it out of his comfort zone, but he did it for his yeshiva, because he felt a certain pride and responsibility towards his school.

My kids do fundraise for certain project type fundraisers, but that's for themselves, not for the school. (For example, for graduation trip raffle, or a chessed project their class is doing)

seeker

Thu, Jan 25 2024, 10:56 pm

amother Navy wrote:

That's great if it's instead of individual goals. I've seen it with both - prizes for the class as well as individual prizes, which is kinda nice but not the same level of solution.

Though the year they did that, one of my kids was in a class with 20+ kids including some rich ones and another kid was in a class of 10+ kids with few if any rich ones. So it was a little tense still.

I'm not a fan. The idea of kids getting involved is nice, but in practice I haven't seen it look like good chinuch at young ages.