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Post partum boss asking when I plan to return
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amother
Sunflower


 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 2:24 pm
amother Strawberry wrote:
That can't be legal. You can't retaliate against employees for taking leave they are legally entitled to.


Only 12 weeks is protected. Anything over that is not, and it can and most likely would effect the employee
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amother
Garnet


 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 2:42 pm
imaima wrote:
You can take how many weeks you want but you have to say esrly enough. It’s not menschlich not to say anything till later


Maternal bonding is allowed and it does save your job.
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amother
Cherry


 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 2:49 pm
its ok you didn't say it earlier
sometimes people just don't know until later
just tell them how much time you are taking
take as much as you are legally entitled to take
v zeh hu
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strivingmom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 4:47 pm
Sounds like it’s an office in Lakewood, if it is I’ll give you my view as a manager working for 9 plus years in the office field.
Most frum ladies these days in my experience take off 8 weeks (used to be 6 weeks but bh is now longer). If they cannot find a baby sitter (very challenging in Lakewood if its in middle of the year) or it comes out during you tov time they will take another week or two, depending on their circumstances.
Anything longer, the employer would probably want you to be upfront and give them prior notice if you are planning on taking longer. If I planned on taking off more than 8 weeks I would let my boss know before having a baby that I plan on taking off for 3 months or whatever time I plan on taking off.
From a Lakewood employers perspective, they usually staff/hire someone to cover you based on this estimated 8 week leave and I think its considerate to let them know beforehand so they can properly cover for you. I don’t know about the legal aspect of this but this is what’s done in majority Female offices in Lakewood.
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amother
Sunflower


 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 4:49 pm
amother Garnet wrote:
Maternal bonding is allowed and it does save your job.


Only up to the 12 weeks (not 18) and she has to legally give them 30 days notice before she starts leave that she’s taking it consecutively. Which she didn’t, and she’s 4 weeks into it
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amother
Periwinkle


 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 5:05 pm
amother Sunflower wrote:
Only up to the 12 weeks (not 18) and she has to legally give them 30 days notice before she starts leave that she’s taking it consecutively. Which she didn’t, and she’s 4 weeks into it

You're mixing up federal and New Jersey law.
Federal law protects an employee from being fired or replaced for taking off up to 12 weeks total per year after a baby is born, if you work for a company that has at least 50 employees within a 75 Mi radius.

New Jersey law has an additional 12 weeks on top of standard temporary disability where they pay you. You can not be fired for taking this time but if you work for a company that has less than 50 employees and you are out 10 weeks or 18 weeks and during that time they hire someone else because they need someone to work and then your job is redundant, they do not have to rehire you.
If they have 50 or more employees then they must rehire you in that position or a position that is equal to the original one at the same pay.
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amother
Dodgerblue


 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 5:09 pm
amother OP wrote:
There’s a reason they’re asking me 4 weeks pp. they obviously don’t want me to take the full 18 weeks.


Why do people always assume such nefarious things of their employers?

It's a fair question. Don't read anything more into it than face value.
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amother
Goldenrod


 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 5:14 pm
Op you said you work from home and you don't need 18 weeks. So what do you want? Your boss to beg you to come back and offer you more money? Honestly I would take the time I need and go back to work without feeling I am doing the boss a favor because I'm taking less than 18 weeks. Remote jobs are in big demand now and there are probably a bunch of other ladies who would be grateful to take your job. If you need the time take it...and be courteous and let your boss know when you plan to return so they can plan accordingly.
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amother
Sunflower


 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 5:33 pm
amother Periwinkle wrote:
You're mixing up federal and New Jersey law.
Federal law protects an employee from being fired or replaced for taking off up to 12 weeks total per year after a baby is born, if you work for a company that has at least 50 employees within a 75 Mi radius.

New Jersey law has an additional 12 weeks on top of standard temporary disability where they pay you. You can not be fired for taking this time but if you work for a company that has less than 50 employees and you are out 10 weeks or 18 weeks and during that time they hire someone else because they need someone to work and then your job is redundant, they do not have to rehire you.
If they have 50 or more employees then they must rehire you in that position or a position that is equal to the original one at the same pay.


I’m aware of the NJ laws, I’m not talking about FMLA. OP was specifically referring to the 12 weeks of PFL from NJ (which protects her job during that time frame, AND requires a 30 days notice to her employer), and 6 weeks of temporary disability (which does not protect her job)

Temporary disability for childbirth is capped at 6 weeks post birth or 8 for c-section

So OP is talking about taking 12 paid family leave, + 6 weeks paid disability for a total of 18 weeks. I’m saying that for the 12 weeks she needed to give notice, and that only those weeks is her job legally protected, not the extra 6
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amother
Daisy


 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 5:36 pm
My child has a therapist in school. She took off for maternity leave. She told me a week before her due date that she was leaving but being her first child doesn’t know how long. My coordinator just told me she’s not coming back till at least May which is over 6 months!
If a child has services and needs it and you know you’ll be taking more than 6 weeks please don’t take the case if you don’t have a sub in advance. All therapists are now booked and you cannot get a replacement. Don’t take a full caseload. Rather be a sub for when others need to take off.

My child’s teachers are noticing how the lack of therapy is negatively affecting my child’s school performance. Coming back for the last 2 weeks of school isn’t much of a help.

You need to give advance notice and plan ahead.
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B'Syata D'Shmya




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 8:23 pm
amother OP wrote:
I am 4 weeks pp. I work for a frum NJ company. Boss reached out and ask when I plan to return. I applied for std which is 6 weeks and j believe pfl is 12 weeks after that? I know it’s not fair to leave my company hanging for so long but I am also entitled to take this time off legally… wwyd? Would you ask for them to make up the difference (pay you for the the time you could’ve taken off if you go back to work early?) how would you say it


You need to do whats best for you and your family within the legal and ethical work-options. Dont worry about their problems - they will work it out. You can never redo this special time with your baby. Enjoy it without guilt feelings. In the end, your investment in your family benefit society the most.
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imaima




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 31 2024, 10:11 pm
amother Garnet wrote:
Maternal bonding is allowed and it does save your job.


What does it have to do with what I wrote? I am talking about communication
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B'Syata D'Shmya




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Apr 01 2024, 7:10 am
amother Daisy wrote:
My child has a therapist in school. She took off for maternity leave. She told me a week before her due date that she was leaving but being her first child doesn’t know how long. My coordinator just told me she’s not coming back till at least May which is over 6 months!
If a child has services and needs it and you know you’ll be taking more than 6 weeks please don’t take the case if you don’t have a sub in advance. All therapists are now booked and you cannot get a replacement. Don’t take a full caseload. Rather be a sub for when others need to take off.

My child’s teachers are noticing how the lack of therapy is negatively affecting my child’s school performance. Coming back for the last 2 weeks of school isn’t much of a help.

You need to give advance notice and plan ahead.


Considering the vital need of the children, I would imagine ethically, the pregnant therapist should help the mothers look for an appropriate replacement.
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amother
Seafoam


 

Post Mon, Apr 01 2024, 7:22 am
B'Syata D'Shmya wrote:
You need to do whats best for you and your family within the legal and ethical work-options. Dont worry about their problems - they will work it out. You can never redo this special time with your baby. Enjoy it without guilt feelings. In the end, your investment in your family benefit society the most.


Of course she should. But that doesn't eliminate the need to communicate appropriately with her boss.

As a boss, it would be the lack of communication that would affect her adversely, and not the time she is taking off. I'm flexible and understanding and accommodate as needed. But if you disregard the needs of the business and don't allow for us to plan accordingly, then that is not an employee we would want to retain. Especially if this situation might recur approx every 2-3 years.

If OP had communicated her plan to her boss, and they would have had an opportunity to hire a temp worker or implement another plan, there wouldn't be any concern. But letting her employer know late in the game, has probably tied his/her hands to some degree.
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amother
Orange


 

Post Mon, Apr 01 2024, 7:34 am
I’ve taken the full 18 weeks maternity leave k”h. Always spoke to my manager ahead of time with my planned leave and return dates (estimated obviously around baby’s due date) and I’ve usually trained a temp replacement.
Everyone recovers differently and I can work up to the day I give birth but I usually need a lot of time postpartum to get back to myself. You have to know yourself and not feel less than cuz others take 8 weeks off or whatever.
Communication is obviously key tho. Hatzlacha and feel good!
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amother
Hosta


 

Post Mon, Apr 01 2024, 7:36 am
amother OP wrote:
There’s a reason they’re asking me 4 weeks pp. they obviously don’t want me to take the full 18 weeks.


That’s not true. It’s 4 weeks postpartum and they want to plan if you’re coming back in 2 weeks or in 14 weeks. Your boss probably wants to figure out if he should delegate some of the work you do to someone else or just wait 2 weeks and have you do it.

I always tell my boss before I have my baby when I plan to come back and how I plan to take my FMLA. It’s only right so they can make a plan.
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queen esther




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Apr 01 2024, 8:15 am
I agree OP has a right to take off as much as she wants or is legally able to, but with communication to the employer being the fair and proper thing to do!

But I am confused about the 18 weeks- is this NY/NJ specific? Anyone know? I know FMLA protects 12 weeks unpaid, and in my previous job at a large company in a different state, taking STD for six weeks was a way to get paid but was still part of the 12 max we could take. Is 18 weeks just the company's policy? Do most of you find this standard?
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amother
Wallflower


 

Post Mon, Apr 01 2024, 8:25 am
amother OP wrote:
I am 4 weeks pp. I work for a frum NJ company. Boss reached out and ask when I plan to return. I applied for std which is 6 weeks and j believe pfl is 12 weeks after that? I know it’s not fair to leave my company hanging for so long but I am also entitled to take this time off legally… wwyd? Would you ask for them to make up the difference (pay you for the the time you could’ve taken off if you go back to work early?) how would you say it

You ask wwyd... What I would do is think how much time off I'd want and when I'll be ready to start working again and then I'd tell the boss when that would be.
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amother
Coffee


 

Post Mon, Apr 01 2024, 8:47 am
queen esther wrote:
I agree OP has a right to take off as much as she wants or is legally able to, but with communication to the employer being the fair and proper thing to do!

But I am confused about the 18 weeks- is this NY/NJ specific? Anyone know? I know FMLA protects 12 weeks unpaid, and in my previous job at a large company in a different state, taking STD for six weeks was a way to get paid but was still part of the 12 max we could take. Is 18 weeks just the company's policy? Do most of you find this standard?


Yes they are NY/NJ specific.

No its a state policy, not a company policy

Yes in NY and NJ, you can take 6 weeks STD, followed by 12 weeks of PFL.

In NJ, both STD and PFL are up to 80% of your paycheck up to a maximum benefit of $1055/week.
In NY, STD

In NY, STD pays 50% of your paycheck up to a maximum benefit of $170/week and PFL pays 67% of your paycheck up to a maximum benefit of $1,151.16/week
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amother
Moccasin


 

Post Mon, Apr 01 2024, 8:56 am
amother Daisy wrote:
My child has a therapist in school. She took off for maternity leave. She told me a week before her due date that she was leaving but being her first child doesn’t know how long. My coordinator just told me she’s not coming back till at least May which is over 6 months!
If a child has services and needs it and you know you’ll be taking more than 6 weeks please don’t take the case if you don’t have a sub in advance. All therapists are now booked and you cannot get a replacement. Don’t take a full caseload. Rather be a sub for when others need to take off.

My child’s teachers are noticing how the lack of therapy is negatively affecting my child’s school performance. Coming back for the last 2 weeks of school isn’t much of a help.

You need to give advance notice and plan ahead.


Its not up to us to find subs. Our agencies are supposed to find subs.
Parents need to understand that when they get school based services for their children, especially from young frum women in their child bearing years, they run the "risk" of their children losing out when we take off after after babies. Your child's therapist is entitled to take off 18 weeks if she wanted and she doesnt need to feel bad about that.
I start off the school year with a full caseload. Why should my parnassa be effected because I want to stay home after I have a baby in the middle of the year?
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