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10 month old screaming every night
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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:00 pm
I just need reassurance that it’s ok if I don’t sleep train her. I’m surrounded by people who think it’s crazy not to.
She is just really used to being nursed back to sleep when she wakes up crying. Even if it’s an hour after being put to sleep (which she usually goes down nicely) the last few nights I have been trying to put my foot down and just going when she cried and hold her and put her back to the crib. Shes not having it. She calms as soon as I pick her up but screams the minute I put her back down. I tried leaving her for a min or two to just cry but it feels so wrong and I don’t want to do it. On the other hand there is a voice I glean telling me that she’s sooo old to be doing this, I must train her etc.
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mushkamothers




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:01 pm
Is she getting enough solids during the day? She could be hungry
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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:06 pm
mushkamothers wrote:
Is she getting enough solids during the day? She could be hungry

Even if I just nursed her? Like tonight I gave her dinner, nursed her for a while, and put her down. She was tired and fell asleep. Woke up maybe an hour later.
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amother
Poinsettia


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:08 pm
Completely developmentally normal for a breastfed baby to still be doing this at 10 months old and if you have the time and patience, you are giving them a lifelong gift.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:11 pm
amother Poinsettia wrote:
Completely developmentally normal for a breastfed baby to still be doing this at 10 months old and if you have the time and patience, you are giving them a lifelong gift.

Thank you for this. I’m feeling so horrible thinking about how hard she cried every time I put her back down in the crib. I can’t say I love nursing every time she wakes up but I hate having her cry so much more. I just feel like I’m doing something wrong and leading myself to a point of having a 2 year old who doesn’t know how to sleep.
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amother
Poinsettia


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:13 pm
amother OP wrote:
Thank you for this. I’m feeling so horrible thinking about how hard she cried every time I put her back down in the crib. I can’t say I love nursing every time she wakes up but I hate having her cry so much more. I just feel like I’m going something wrong and leading myself to a point of having a 2 year old who didn’t know how to sleep.
I sleep trained my kids at 2 when I weaned them... they sleep fine now
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shachachti




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:22 pm
amother OP wrote:
Thank you for this. I’m feeling so horrible thinking about how hard she cried every time I put her back down in the crib. I can’t say I love nursing every time she wakes up but I hate having her cry so much more. I just feel like I’m doing something wrong and leading myself to a point of having a 2 year old who doesn’t know how to sleep.


I thought you were going to say "leading myself to the point of having an 18 year old that doesn't know how to sleep".

Of course you're ok.

This whole sleep training movement is going ten steps back as a society.

Mothers please do what your natural instincts tell you to do. You won't spoil or ruin your kids.
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mushkamothers




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:29 pm
amother OP wrote:
Even if I just nursed her? Like tonight I gave her dinner, nursed her for a while, and put her down. She was tired and fell asleep. Woke up maybe an hour later.


When my babies keep waking up a lot at this age it's usually because they haven't eaten enough solids during day. (I nurse and don't let them cry) don't worry about sleep training. Keep going to her. I'm just trying to help with the frequent wake ups
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amother
Moonstone


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:30 pm
amother OP wrote:
I just need reassurance that it’s ok if I don’t sleep train her. I’m surrounded by people who think it’s crazy not to.
She is just really used to being nursed back to sleep when she wakes up crying. Even if it’s an hour after being put to sleep (which she usually goes down nicely) the last few nights I have been trying to put my foot down and just going when she cried and hold her and put her back to the crib. Shes not having it. She calms as soon as I pick her up but screams the minute I put her back down. I tried leaving her for a min or two to just cry but it feels so wrong and I don’t want to do it. On the other hand there is a voice I glean telling me that she’s sooo old to be doing this, I must train her etc.

Don’t let her cry. Just nurse her back to sleep.
Don’t worry about sleep training her. Just keep going back to her. It’s so important to be there for your babies night and day.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:34 pm
Thank you so much.
I’m going to back to nursing whenever she wakes up as tired as I am. I wish I could take back the last few nights. It was so hard on both of us
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:36 pm
mushkamothers wrote:
When my babies keep waking up a lot at this age it's usually because they haven't eaten enough solids during day. (I nurse and don't let them cry) don't worry about sleep training. Keep going to her. I'm just trying to help with the frequent wake ups
it’s not that or else they wouldn’t be all happy and cute when you hold them. And babies at this age don’t even need solids technically. My older baby was eating a ton of solids at dinner and he would do this as well. My current 9.5 month old is doing the same and he’s barely on any solids (and is really fat if that matters). It’s a stage. Op it’s ok. I’m doing the same and it’s really ok as long as you are ok with the nursing. If you get resentful you can have your husband give baby a bottle of pumped milk or formula. When I stopped nursing my older baby (he was over a year old l) he would wake up to nurse and I would offer him regular milk and he didn’t want it (even though he drank it by day). He wasn’t thirsty and he wasn’t hungry he just wanted to nurse. I felt bad but bad stopped nursing for medical reasons and I couldn’t nurse. After two nights of this when he realized he wasn’t getting nursed he slept through the night
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amother
Moonstone


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:36 pm
amother OP wrote:
Thank you so much.
I’m going to back to nursing whenever she wakes up as tired as I am. I wish I could take back the last few nights. It was so hard on both of us

That’s a good idea. Don’t listen to those that push sleep training. Letting a baby cry at night at is neglectful and harmful to baby. Listen to your motherly instincts. Your baby is lucky to have you.
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amother
Moonstone


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:38 pm
amother Fuchsia wrote:
it’s not that or else they wouldn’t be all happy and cute when you hold them. And babies at this age don’t even need solids technically. My older baby was eating a ton of solids at dinner and he would do this as well. My current 9.5 month old is doing the same and he’s barely on any solids (and is really fat if that matters). It’s a stage. Op it’s ok. I’m doing the same and it’s really ok as long as you are ok with the nursing. If you get resentful you can have your husband give baby a bottle of pumped milk or formula. When I stopped nursing my older baby (he was over a year old l) he would wake up to nurse and I would offer him regular milk and he didn’t want it (even though he drank it by day). He wasn’t thirsty and he wasn’t hungry he just wanted to nurse. I felt bad but bad stopped nursing for medical reasons and I couldn’t nurse. After two nights of this when he realized he wasn’t getting nursed he slept through the night

At 10 months the main source of nutrition is from formula or breastmilk but a baby should be having 3 meals a day of solids along with the formula and breastmilk throughout the day.It’s important at this age especially for iron for babies that are breastfed.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 7:42 pm
I do worry that it could be teething or hunger or even an ear infection thay I’ve missed. It’s more comfortable to just nurse and know I’m covered. It just gets a bit much to not have any security of a night. Not be able to leave with a babysitter etc. (I exclusively nurse no bottles which is prob also part of the issue and my fault)
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amother
Stoneblue


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 8:03 pm
I didn't try it yet, because my baby is still young but I'm going to try soon. My mother said that I shouldn't be the one going to the baby, rather my husband should be going. Because when he sees me he expects to nurse.
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amother
Stoneblue


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 8:04 pm
amother OP wrote:
I do worry that it could be teething or hunger or even an ear infection thay I’ve missed. It’s more comfortable to just nurse and know I’m covered. It just gets a bit much to not have any security of a night. Not be able to leave with a babysitter etc. (I exclusively nurse no bottles which is prob also part of the issue and my fault)


If you're worried about an ear infection or something like that, you can always go to the doctor to check it out to be sure you are in the clear.

If the baby wakes up often because of teething give her Advil. She might be waking up because she's in pain.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 8:16 pm
amother Stoneblue wrote:
If you're worried about an ear infection or something like that, you can always go to the doctor to check it out to be sure you are in the clear.

If the baby wakes up often because of teething give her Advil. She might be waking up because she's in pain.

My point was that I don’t always know for sure why she’s crying. At this age it could be something or just wanting to nurse Stam.
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amother
Thistle


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 8:17 pm
I didn't read the replies, just the original post, but maybe this book could help?

I noticed a threads bashing the approach. Similarly on Amazon reviews, many love, but some find "cruel". Not trying to change course of posts here, but I'm reading this book, haven't tried it yet though, but wonder if done with sechel, love, patience, & mother's intuition to know when to take breaks, 2 steps forwards one step back, to respect the process, that it might be really helpful:

Twelve Hours' Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old: A Step-by-Step Plan for Baby Sleep Success https://www.amazon.com/dp/0525.....ss_tl
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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 8:21 pm
amother Thistle wrote:
I didn't read the replies, just the original post, but maybe this book could help?

I noticed a threads bashing the approach. Similarly on Amazon reviews, many love, but some find "cruel". Not trying to change course of posts here, but I'm reading this book, haven't tried it yet though, but wonder if done with sechel, love, patience, & mother's intuition to know when to take breaks, 2 steps forwards one step back, to respect the process, that it might be really helpful:

Twelve Hours' Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old: A Step-by-Step Plan for Baby Sleep Success https://www.amazon.com/dp/0525.....ss_tl

Thank you for trying to help. I actually read this book with my last kid bec a friend insisted it was a magic book…but it really didn’t resonate with me at all. I also felt it was very much not for an exclusively breastfed baby.
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mushkamothers




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, May 18 2024, 8:38 pm
amother Thistle wrote:
I didn't read the replies, just the original post, but maybe this book could help?

I noticed a threads bashing the approach. Similarly on Amazon reviews, many love, but some find "cruel". Not trying to change course of posts here, but I'm reading this book, haven't tried it yet though, but wonder if done with sechel, love, patience, & mother's intuition to know when to take breaks, 2 steps forwards one step back, to respect the process, that it might be really helpful:

Twelve Hours' Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old: A Step-by-Step Plan for Baby Sleep Success https://www.amazon.com/dp/0525.....ss_tl


This book is the definition of sleep training. It's not even biologically healthy for a 12 week old baby to sleep 12 hours uninterrupted.
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