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DL family making aliyah - are we crazy?



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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 5:27 am
Hi,

I've been wanting for years and years to make Aliyah and we'refinally planning it. We are DL and that community is a bit lackluster as a lot of people make aliyah or go to the left or right. I feel like I'm just surviving here. I really love being in Israel. A lot of my friends have moved there already. We know where we want to live.

We are giving up our easy-ish life and jobs here so I just wanted to check are we crazy for doing this? I used to be very impulsive and if it was just me I would have gone by now but we have little kids and all that baggage, house, cars, jobs etc. so I'm finding it hard to trust myself and know what's right. My oldest (6 yo) and husband want to go, I'm just nervous and second guessing myself. Does everyone feel like this before a big life decision?
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Success10




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 5:32 am
It is a big life decision. But of course you're not crazy. It has worked for many families. Your kids are young and you fit nicely into DL community, so you don't have the a lot of the major issues most families face when contemplating the move. You just need to plan it out financially beforehand and speak to people in your fields of work, see what your opportunities are, if you can realistically make it work here. To just jump in without a plan, that's crazy. And you do need to be a little bit crazy to live here so it's all good.

Last edited by Success10 on Mon, May 20 2024, 5:32 am; edited 1 time in total
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 5:32 am
You are definitely not crazy. And if your oldest is 6, that is a perfect age to go. They are young enough that they will hopefully aclimate beautifully over time.
If you want to tell us where you are moving to, maybe someone here could tell you more about the location.
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jerusalem90




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 5:48 am
Not crazy at all.

1. Israelis are much much happier than Americans. Fact. Is wealth/convienience more important than happiness?

2. Israelis are much healthier, physically and mentally, than Americans. Is weath/convienience more important than health?

3. Mitzvat yishuv haaretz

People who give up their and their familes health and happiness so they can shop at Costco are the crazy ones, not you!
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essie14




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 5:48 am
You are not crazy at all. It's SOOOO normal to feel anxious about one of the most major life decisions you'll ever have to make.
Your child is at a great age for aliyah.
Feel free to PM me any time. Happy to give you support.
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amother
Azure


 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 5:58 am
Isn’t DL an Israeli designation?
What does that mean in the States?
Have a successful Aliya ❤️
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 6:09 am
You're crazy the way the chalutzim who built Israel were crazy. Were it not for their craziness, we would have no State of Israel today, the territory would still be under British occupation, and Jewish immigration would
still be severely restricted.
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Bnei Berak 10




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 6:25 am
Mazel Tov OP and welcome Smile
Hope you and your family will have a soft landing.
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justforfun87




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 6:34 am
PM me! Same situation here. I am wondering if this is my midlife crisis but I wouldn't want any other midlife crisis Smile. My kids are even older and I believe that increases the challenges.

It is crazy to do this but we really only have one life to live. It has NEVER been easier to make Aliyah. Think about those who have escaped Iran with nothing in their pockets. We are Americans. We have cushions.
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grace413




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 6:51 am
Not crazy at all. Smart and brave.

Perfect time to come when your kids are still young.

It's not always easy at first but people are welcoming and helpful and odds are that you will be happy to be here.

Hatzlacha!
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 7:58 am
Yes I definitely have early mid life crisis vibes. Like I dont want to die here! Glad it's not just me. I just worry about all the unknowns.
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 8:28 am
I've been living somewhere I don't really like for so long and I've just become content with it. It's like I'm institutionalised (not sure if that's the right word) and I think it's made me quite anxious (as you can tell!).

We have a plan but with some unknowns. I'm in engineering. My husband will have to retrain but we've got savings to help in the meantime. We have friends who live where we want to go. We're learning hebrew. We know what school we want to send to. Is that a plan?

Thank you so much for your responses.
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amother
Banana


 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 8:30 am
I'll be the dissenting voice here. You need to discuss this irl with people that know you irl. You need to weigh the pros and cons of everything and not just give into some hype to make aliyah. This should take careful attention, consideration and scrutiny. Hugs
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amother
Gold


 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 8:33 am
Kol Hakavod to you. You are brave and strong. I wish I could pick up and go. For me, that ship has currently sailed and In waiting for a new one to come to port. (Waiting for my nest to empty)
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justforfun87




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 8:42 am
amother OP wrote:
I've been living somewhere I don't really like for so long and I've just become content with it. It's like I'm institutionalised (not sure if that's the right word) and I think it's made me quite anxious (as you can tell!).

We have a plan but with some unknowns. I'm in engineering. My husband will have to retrain but we've got savings to help in the meantime. We have friends who live where we want to go. We're learning hebrew. We know what school we want to send to. Is that a plan?

Thank you so much for your responses.


Sounds like a pretty solid plan to me. I think there has to be some sort of emunah in this process. You really can't plan everything. I very much worry what will happen if my husband loses his job gd forbid. I do think though that you have to have some financial savings/cushions. I don't have enough emunah to go with $0.
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amother
Mintgreen


 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 8:44 am
amother OP wrote:
I've been living somewhere I don't really like for so long and I've just become content with it. It's like I'm institutionalised (not sure if that's the right word) and I think it's made me quite anxious (as you can tell!).

We have a plan but with some unknowns. I'm in engineering. My husband will have to retrain but we've got savings to help in the meantime. We have friends who live where we want to go. We're learning hebrew. We know what school we want to send to. Is that a plan?

Thank you so much for your responses.


It sounds like you're in a great position for Aliyah. If course you have doubts. It's a huge life change. But you'll be so glad you did it.
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amother
Wine


 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 8:44 am
jerusalem90 wrote:
Not crazy at all.

1. Israelis are much much happier than Americans. Fact. Is wealth/convienience more important than happiness?

2. Israelis are much healthier, physically and mentally, than Americans. Is weath/convienience more important than health?

3. Mitzvat yishuv haaretz

People who give up their and their familes health and happiness so they can shop at Costco are the crazy ones, not you!



I don't think your bolded is a fair comparison. Assuming it's true, the better question is whether people who made aliya are happier because of it. It's very different for people who were born in Israel and grew up with Israeli lifestyle than for those making aliya. People get used to things and change can be hard.

If I told you that in the 1980's people were happier without their smart phones. While this is probably true, it would be very hard to give up your phone once you are already used to it.
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LovesHashem




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 8:54 am
amother Banana wrote:
I'll be the dissenting voice here. You need to discuss this irl with people that know you irl. You need to weigh the pros and cons of everything and not just give into some hype to make aliyah. This should take careful attention, consideration and scrutiny. Hugs


Yes and no. No one can make the decision for her and no one IRL in her community that knows her can tell her what it's like on the ground in Israel and help her sort out what practically life would look like.
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essie14




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 8:56 am
amother OP wrote:
I've been living somewhere I don't really like for so long and I've just become content with it. It's like I'm institutionalised (not sure if that's the right word) and I think it's made me quite anxious (as you can tell!).

We have a plan but with some unknowns. I'm in engineering. My husband will have to retrain but we've got savings to help in the meantime. We have friends who live where we want to go. We're learning hebrew. We know what school we want to send to. Is that a plan?

Thank you so much for your responses.

Very solid plan.
You're definitely ahead of the game.

There will always be unknowns.
Don't expect anything to go perfectly the first year and then you'll be pleasantly surprised. Your friends and neighbors will be incredibly supportive.
If you have a go with the flow personality you'll do great. It's such a huge scary decision and it sounds like you did a lot of legwork and I think you guys will do great.
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jerusalem90




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2024, 9:47 am
amother Wine wrote:
I don't think your bolded is a fair comparison. Assuming it's true, the better question is whether people who made aliya are happier because of it. It's very different for people who were born in Israel and grew up with Israeli lifestyle than for those making aliya. People get used to things and change can be hard.

If I told you that in the 1980's people were happier without their smart phones. While this is probably true, it would be very hard to give up your phone once you are already used to it.


This is true. Still, I'd rather have my children grow up in the happier country.
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