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Cannot afford childcare for my baby
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amother
OP


 

Post Yesterday at 5:10 am
I have a baby who stays home with me while I work. He's now turning into a yummy toddler who can no longer stay home while I work. But the problem is that Lakewood playgroup prices have skyrocketed since my last baby. Adding in playgroup for him is going to put me over the edge financially. I've asked my boss for a large raise, and I haven't gotten an answer yet. If I don't get the raise, we simply aren't going to be able to make it through the month. If I do get the raise, we'll still be even tighter than we already are.
Any advice?
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amother
Stonewash


 

Post Yesterday at 5:22 am
Cut back in other ways
Move to a place with cheaper childcare
Arrange a round the robin
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amother
OP


 

Post Yesterday at 5:27 am
Thanks, but cutting back in other ways will seriously affect my quality of life (the only place where I can cut back is cleaning help!!).
Not fun!
And Lakewood is about as good as it gets in terms of childcare.
And I can't take part in a round robin and simultaneously do my job!
And my husband cannot increase his income. He has a chronic health condition and is struggling.
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amother
Milk


 

Post Yesterday at 5:36 am
amother OP wrote:
I have a baby who stays home with me while I work. He's now turning into a yummy toddler who can no longer stay home while I work. But the problem is that Lakewood playgroup prices have skyrocketed since my last baby. Adding in playgroup for him is going to put me over the edge financially. I've asked my boss for a large raise, and I haven't gotten an answer yet. If I don't get the raise, we simply aren't going to be able to make it through the month. If I do get the raise, we'll still be even tighter than we already are.
Any advice?

Thats not really how or why a raise happens.
A raise happens because of ypur performance. Not because your living expenses have gone up.
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amother
Stonewash


 

Post Yesterday at 5:39 am
amother OP wrote:
Thanks, but cutting back in other ways will seriously affect my quality of life (the only place where I can cut back is cleaning help!!).
Not fun!
And Lakewood is about as good as it gets in terms of childcare.
And I can't take part in a round robin and simultaneously do my job!
And my husband cannot increase his income. He has a chronic health condition and is struggling.


So what do you want? Get a better job with better pay then. Go on bc. Your boss isn't obligated to give you a big raise because your expenses went up and you don't want to cut back.
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naomi2




 
 
    
 

Post Yesterday at 5:43 am
amother Stonewash wrote:
So what do you want? Get a better job with better pay then. Go on bc. Your boss isn't obligated to give you a big raise because your expenses went up and you don't want to cut back.

At the very least a little sympathy. Op is struggling so maybe cut back on the negativity
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amother
Stonewash


 

Post Yesterday at 5:45 am
naomi2 wrote:
At the very least a little sympathy. Op is struggling so maybe cut back on the negativity


I'm sorry. I do have sympathy. I was trying to be helpful but it doesnt seem like op is open to ideas. Op I hope things ease up for you.
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chanatron1000




 
 
    
 

Post Yesterday at 5:49 am
amother Milk wrote:
Thats not really how or why a raise happens.
A raise happens because of ypur performance. Not because your living expenses have gone up.


This is only partly true. It depends on other factors. If living expenses have gone up due to inflation (which is part of the equation here) then the price of labor is supposed to go up along with everything else. Also, very often people are due a raise because their performance/value has gone up, but they only ask for it when they start to feel some financial strain.
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amother
Dimgray


 

Post Yesterday at 5:54 am
Can you try a round robin and change your hours to work on sunday lets say or evenings so your husband can help at home to make up for the hours u r doing the round robin. Or what about sending for half day, if you managed till now with him at home maybe only a few hours a day will do it, or every other day
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amother
Birch


 

Post Yesterday at 5:57 am
amother OP wrote:
Thanks, but cutting back in other ways will seriously affect my quality of life (the only place where I can cut back is cleaning help!!).
Not fun!
And Lakewood is about as good as it gets in terms of childcare.
And I can't take part in a round robin and simultaneously do my job!
And my husband cannot increase his income. He has a chronic health condition and is struggling.


I'm really sorry you're in a difficult situation. I know cleaning help os a tough place to cut back on, but IYH it will just be temporary. I'm sure a lot of women here canngive suggestions for how to manage with reduced cleaning help. The alternative, not being able to pay expenses and going into debt, is a much lower quality of life in my opinion.
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amother
OP


 

Post Yesterday at 6:06 am
Thanks. Some of these answers are really inappropriate. Like you're assuming I'm not on bc?? You're assuming that I wasn't on bc when I became pregnant?! You're assuming that I didn't ask for a raise appropriately? My boss agrees that I deserve it based on performance. It still needs to be approved by the department that controls budget.
I guess what I really need is ideas for increasing my income if this doesn't work. Or cheaper ideas for childcare specific to Lakewood. Or something else out of the box that I haven't thought of...
Or just sympathy about how impossible it is to be a working mother in 2024!
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amother
Milk


 

Post Yesterday at 6:14 am
chanatron1000 wrote:
This is only partly true. It depends on other factors. If living expenses have gone up due to inflation (which is part of the equation here) then the price of labor is supposed to go up along with everything else. Also, very often people are due a raise because their performance/value has gone up, but they only ask for it when they start to feel some financial strain.

I meant nobody is given a raise for the reason the op needs/wants one.
I was not talking about inflation.
I meant everything is the same except the family expenses have gone up.
That is not a reason to be asking for a raise.
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amother
OP


 

Post Yesterday at 6:18 am
Well, it is inflation. My babysitting expenses for this baby will be 33% higher than I paid for my last baby.
My company only gave me about a tenth of that as an inflation raise.
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amother
Stonewash


 

Post Yesterday at 6:19 am
amother OP wrote:
Well, it is inflation. My babysitting expenses for this baby will be 33% higher than I paid for my last baby.
My company only gave me about a tenth of that as an inflation raise.


Can you look for a better paying job? Work more hours?
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GLUE




 
 
    
 

Post Yesterday at 6:24 am
amother Stonewash wrote:
So what do you want? Get a better job with better pay then. Go on bc. Your boss isn't obligated to give you a big raise because your expenses went up and you don't want to cut back.

How is BC going to help paying for childcare for a toddler, Now?
Please explain
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amother
OP


 

Post Yesterday at 6:24 am
It happens to be an intensely stressful time in my life right now...
I would prefer to hold off a year or so before job hunting.
But with my baby out, adding more hours could be a possibility.
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Cookin4days




 
 
    
 

Post Yesterday at 6:25 am
No advice just sympathy !! Hope it works out and you get that raise
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#BestBubby




 
 
    
 

Post Yesterday at 6:26 am
Hashemi please bless OP with abundant and easy Parnossah
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flowerpower




 
 
    
 

Post Yesterday at 6:27 am
Have you looked into vouchers? Is that an option? If your dh has a chronic health condition can he apply for benefits? I’m trying to think of ways that you can help your finances…
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#BestBubby




 
 
    
 

Post Yesterday at 6:27 am
OP, maybe take Tomchei Shobbos for now.

Are there any government programs you can get?
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