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5 year old saw in the mikvah what do I say??
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 5:11 pm
My 5 year old went with my husband to hang up a sign in a shul (for a simcha). the board for the signs are in the basement.
While my husband was hanging up the sign, a door to the mikvah opened and he saw in. He was just staring wide eyed. Dh asked him what he saw and he said a lot of tottys and boys were making (using the bathroom). Do I let it go or do I explain something? What do I do if he asks?
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amother
Dodgerblue


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 5:13 pm
I would explain on his level. No harm.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 5:13 pm
Whats wrong with just saying tattys clean themselves as a mitzvah before yom tov?
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amother
Tealblue


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 5:15 pm
If he's not asking questions, just leave it at that. No reason to delve in to it.
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amother
Offwhite


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 5:15 pm
It's no issue at all for a child to know about mikvah, it's part of frum life.
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amother
Lightblue


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 5:15 pm
My 5 yr olds go to mikvah. My kids start going when they're toilet trained (only erev shabbos). What would be wrong with explaining mikvah to a 5 yr old?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 5:37 pm
Mikvah isn't a bad thing but how do I explain to him?
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amother
Wine


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 6:54 pm
amother OP wrote:
Mikvah isn't a bad thing but how do I explain to him?


They weren't actually making, when you make then you go privately in the bathroom and nobody can see your private part.

They were going in the mikvah which is like a big swimming pool but without bathing suits. It's special before Yom tov. When you are bar mitzvah you will go too.



(Don't ask me how it makes sense that private parts are now allowed to be public....)
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amother
Tealblue


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 6:56 pm
amother Lightblue wrote:
My 5 yr olds go to mikvah. My kids start going when they're toilet trained (only erev shabbos). What would be wrong with explaining mikvah to a 5 yr old?


This is child abuse.
There's absolutely no acceptable excuse for a child to go to mikvah before bar mitzvah.
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amother
Tealblue


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 6:58 pm
amother OP wrote:
Mikvah isn't a bad thing but how do I explain to him?


That erev shabbos many totties go toivel in the mikvah. Toivel means that they go in to a small pool of water to get clean for Shabbos.
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amother
Mocha


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 6:59 pm
amother Wine wrote:
They weren't actually making, when you make then you go privately in the bathroom and nobody can see your private part.

They were going in the mikvah which is like a big swimming pool but without bathing suits. It's special before Yom tov. When you are bar mitzvah you will go too.



(Don't ask me how it makes sense that private parts are now allowed to be public....)

They say that the best thing is to be a gay Jewish man.
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amother
Lightblue


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 7:09 pm
amother Tealblue wrote:
This is child abuse.
There's absolutely no acceptable excuse for a child to go to mikvah before bar mitzvah.


Abuse?! For real? What part of a father taking his boys with him to mikvah is abusive? The kids who want to go, go and the kids who don't want to go, don't go.
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amother
Zinnia


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 7:17 pm
amother Lightblue wrote:
Abuse?! For real? What part of a father taking his boys with him to mikvah is abusive? The kids who want to go, go and the kids who don't want to go, don't go.


I don't think a child is allowed to go with his father in the mikvah, and without a father to supervise, yes, there is a huge opportunity for abuse.
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amother
Tealblue


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 7:21 pm
amother Lightblue wrote:
Abuse?! For real? What part of a father taking his boys with him to mikvah is abusive? The kids who want to go, go and the kids who don't want to go, don't go.


A son is not allowed to go with his father, that's the halachic part.
The abuse part is that the little boy may see exposed men. A mikvah is no place for a little boy & there's absolutely no reason for them to go before they have to.
Many mikvah's have implemented a specific timing when only bochurim may go then.
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amother
Dahlia


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 7:31 pm
amother Tealblue wrote:
This is child abuse.
There's absolutely no acceptable excuse for a child to go to mikvah before bar mitzvah.


What changes at bar mitzvah?
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amother
NeonBlue


 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 7:50 pm
Literally the entire chassidish world is abusive and against Halacha then…
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NotInNJMommy




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 7:55 pm
It’s not an issue if the child is not older than 9-10 yrs to go with his father or at any age if they aren’t in the same area, undressed at the mikvah at the same time, etc. even with those of the opinion to be strict about “bathing” with one’s father.
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giftedmom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 8:02 pm
amother OP wrote:
My 5 year old went with my husband to hang up a sign in a shul (for a simcha). the board for the signs are in the basement.
While my husband was hanging up the sign, a door to the mikvah opened and he saw in. He was just staring wide eyed. Dh asked him what he saw and he said a lot of tottys and boys were making (using the bathroom). Do I let it go or do I explain something? What do I do if he asks?

Follow his lead and be very matter of fact. Men and boys are a lot more chilled about these things.
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groisamomma




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 11 2024, 8:06 pm
amother Lightblue wrote:
My 5 yr olds go to mikvah. My kids start going when they're toilet trained (only erev shabbos). What would be wrong with explaining mikvah to a 5 yr old?


I really hope you’re joking.

My DH is as chassidish as they come and he never allowed DS to step foot in there before bar mitzva. DH and his brothers weren’t either allowed before bar mitzva.

I really hope your toilet-trained toddler is aware of signs of predators lurking nearby. Mikva is a breeding grounds for pedophiles.

(As for fathers and sons going to the Mikva together, they just can’t be in the water at the same time. They can be in the Mikva area together.)
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Iymnok




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 12 2024, 2:45 pm
We wash the tuma off our hands in the morning. The mikvah is a way to wash the tuma off the whole body at once. A lot of tattis go before yuntiv.


(When moshiach comes we will all have to go before going to the beis hamikdash)
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