Pay to do chessed | Imamother

amother

OP ↓

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 12:44 am

Unpopular opinion that I’m embarrassed to voice in public: Can't Believe It

I am so turned off by the marketing of ‘volunteer to do chessed during the nine days’ by paying for the privilege of doing said chessed.
Seriously, I think something’s wrong with me and I really hope I’m not c”v spreading any type of lashon hara against an organisation that is probably so wonderful, and people who work there that are probably so altruistic and devoted. Crying

But.
What in the world?
Pay to stuff a box of chessed?
Reach out to all your contacts to pressure them to come and join too?
Really?
How about this for a nine days chessed activity invitation:
‘Please kindly consider volunteering your time to help a worthy cause- come stuff boxes for distribution to people going through a hard time. If you are unable to volunteer your time (and even if you are Wink

), please consider sponsoring a box or ten. All donations of time and money are welcomed and appreciated. Thanks for considering!’ Confused

salt

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 12:47 am

As long as you know that you have to pay in the first place, there's nothing wrong with it.
No one has to.
Think of it more like paying for an experience, and while enjoying the experience, you're also helping out needy people, and giving a donation.
If you don't want to, do join.
And if the organization doesn't find enough takers for this activity, they'll change their plan.

ChutzPAh

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 1:16 am

It’s not really paying to do chessed- it’s a fundraiser plain and simple and the twist they added to it is to pack the boxes. I think it’s very transparent and see no issues with it.

amother

Steel

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 1:31 am

Honestly that sounds so ridiculous and twisted.
But anyway, no worries, you can all come do chesed by me free of charge!!!
I have baby’s that you can watch, dishes you can wash, mending, and many more on site specials! All free of charge for the experience!

amother

Dodgerblue

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 1:46 am

So- as an example- you have to pay to do chesed? Where does the money actually go? It is very odd indeed but I suppose it brings in even more to that tzedaka organization?

amother

Daffodil

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 2:07 am

It sounds like there's a chessed organisation that is looking to raise some money. And they want to do it in a different way to encourage the cynics tired of paying out constantly for this chessed and that chessed. So they make it into an exciting event, get some hype and make the donors feel like their money is going somewhere great and they can be a part of it. Like you might volunteer at a soup kitchen. So the people with money can feel good about helping a fellow Jew and they are actively helping instead of just handing over the money and don't see where it goes.
I actually think it's quite clever. It's about trying to bring in more money, less about stuffing boxes or whatever you have to do.

amother

Darkblue ↓

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 2:43 am

I use to work for a soup kitchen. We didn't ask people to pay to volunteer there, but the work they did was insignificant. Sometimes, if we had lots of groups, we had them moving supplies from one end of the storage area to the other. The next group would move them back. (The person in charge would explain why they needed to be in the other place, to make room for new deliveries.) Kitchen work had to be done, regardless of volunteers, so there was the regular staff who either did the work or spent time showing g volunteers what to do and encouraging them at how wonderful they were to peel a potato.

When people felt involved, and had donated physical effort, they donated more money. It's as simple as that.

seeker

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 3:20 am

It's a fundraiser. You're not paying to do the chessed; the packing boxes etc is to help you feel connected to the cause. If you're talking about chessed 24/7, packing a shabbos care package for a hospital puts you in the mindset of considering the needs of a person who is in the hospital over shabbos. You also can feel like you're putting more heart into making something nice rather than just handing over money which is a big mitzvah but can sometimes feel burned out. And it's something to do to get people together to hear the organization's story instead of a less interactive sales pitch.

There's plenty of chessed that can be done for free, if you prefer. It's not always the things people want to do, though.

amother

Apple

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 3:22 am

amother Darkblue wrote:

I kind of get the last part, but it's a bit sad that people pointlessly wasted their time when they could have been doing a different and needed chessed elsewhere! What about the lonely old lady who had noone to talk to whilst those boxes were lugged back and forth...

amother

↑ Darkblue

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 3:30 am

amother Apple wrote:

Well, the head of the organisation was later arrested for tax fraud, and a lot of his practices can't really be condoned.

On the other hand if you think of a group coming to Israel who want to spend some time volunteering, they're not going to go and talk to a loney old lady, who isn't even interested in hosting them. They're looking for an organisation who can give them a feeling that they are doing something meaningful. While the work didn't really make much difference to the organisation, the money people donated did. The work was a way of making them feel involved, and that providing a meal for poor people was important to them, so they donated.

amother

Charcoal

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 5:35 am

the organization that is arranging it provides comfort to those in the hospital you should never need their services. You don't have to donate. My friend arranges one of these get togethers and I never give a donation because I don't have the funds, but I do go and stuff the boxes.

If you feel pressured to give then don't go or tell the person arranging beforehand that you would love to come but you are only coming to stuff boxes and can't give a donation at this time.

There are other ways to do the mitzvah of bikur cholim, offer rides to people, make a pot of soup for a person that just came home from the hospital, offer to watch someone's kids so they can go to a doctor etc. call up your local bikur cholim and ask how you can help out.

also, whatever you decide to do for Chessed is between you and the one above you don't have to answer to anyone there are so many types of chessed people can do and many causes to donate to.

amother

Tuberose

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 10:57 am

amother Darkblue wrote:

Wow this feels so wrong
You're not even allowed to give a slave with that is useless/busy work!!

Genius

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 11:01 am

amother Darkblue wrote:

Making people move boxes back and forth has no excuse. It’s extremely disrespectful. How about just telling them it will be more helpful if they donate and use their time to visit local sites to keep the economy moving? Shameful.

Amelia Bedelia

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 11:04 am

I don't see what the problem with that ad is. They don't say you have to pay to stuff boxes. They're looking for volunteers to stuff boxes AND THEY'RE ALSO LOOKING FOR DONATIONS, which is obvious.

amother

NeonPink

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 11:59 am

A couple years ago I volunteered to make one of their 9 days parties. It was okay but the way it was advertised to do was completely wrong. As a host I was told that people could not stuff boxes unless they paid. At the end, I was stuck with a ton of boxes that people didn't pay to stuff. And then I was told to go and stuff for myself. I wish they were just advertise it as stuffing the boxes and if you want you can give the donation. They also had bears that year there was supposed to be stuffed and you have to pay extra to do that. My kids were left to stuff 50 bears because people didn't want to pay extra to stuff for beer. I was on their WhatsApp group and everybody was having the same problem. It would be much better if they would just say stuff the boxes stuff the bear...

amother

Snowdrop

Tue, Jul 30 2024, 12:03 pm

I actually enjoy doing it. One year there were tons of boxes left so I helped the host do all of them. I hope they are ok with me not paying for all the boxes and only paying for one. But it’s a fundraiser and a fun one, so I go every year and enjoy the night out with friends.