Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> The Social Scene -> Entertainment
When you meet a friend at a wedding do you tell them
1  2  3  4  Next



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h



Do you usually say "you look so beautiful" when you meet someone at a wedding?
Yes, I'm yeshivish/litvish  
 25%  [ 68 ]
No, I'm yeshivish /litvish  
 4%  [ 11 ]
Yes, I'm chassidish/Heimish  
 38%  [ 102 ]
No,I'm chassidish /heimish  
 3%  [ 8 ]
Yes, I'm JPF  
 15%  [ 41 ]
No, I'm JPF  
 4%  [ 11 ]
Yes, I'm MO  
 4%  [ 11 ]
No, I'm MO  
 1%  [ 5 ]
Other  
 3%  [ 8 ]
Total Votes : 265



amother
OP  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:23 am
"You look so beautiful? (Or similar)" Assuming they do. Like the mother of the kallah.
Back to top

amother
Copper


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:25 am
I’m intrigued by the connection you’re trying to make.
Back to top

amother
Puce


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:25 am
I voted no, then I read your OP. I do tell immediate family of the chassan/ kallah how beautiful they look. I wouldn't tell a random guest which is what I thought you were asking
Back to top

amother
Scarlet  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:27 am
How do I vote if I convey this message in other words?
I voted other
Back to top

amother
  OP  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:27 am
amother Copper wrote:
I’m intrigued by the connection you’re trying to make.

Lol. This is based on a conversation I had IRL.
Back to top

amother
  OP  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:29 am
amother Scarlet wrote:
How do I vote if I convey this message in other words?
I voted other

What do you say?
Back to top

amother
Catmint


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:33 am
Yes, and if I'm greeting the mom of the kallah or a close relative if I know the mom I always give a compliment on how beautiful her children look as well.

Always makes people happy 😊
Back to top

amother
  Scarlet  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:35 am
amother OP wrote:
What do you say?

Is it the wording that bothers you?
Back to top

amother
  OP  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:42 am
amother Scarlet wrote:
Is it the wording that bothers you?

It actually doesn't bother me and I voted yes. Based on a conversation irl, I'm trying to see if people typically compliment others on their looks or dress and if it's community dependent.
Back to top

amother
  Scarlet  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:45 am
amother OP wrote:
It actually doesn't bother me and I voted yes. Based on a conversation irl, I'm trying to see if people typically compliment others on their looks or dress and if it's community dependent.

I'd assume that complimenting someone who looks stunning, gown, face and wig etc., it not community dependent but basic social norms.
Back to top

amother
  OP  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:50 am
amother Scarlet wrote:
I'd assume that complimenting someone who looks stunning, gown, face and wig etc., it not community dependent but basic social norms.

I thought so too. Until someone told me it's community dependent and that she didn't get one such compliment at her child's wedding. She'd even be insulted if she'd get such a compliment! That was very interesting to me. Hence the poll.
Back to top

amother
Magnolia


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:51 am
I’m mo and was mother of the bride
Had makeup and hair done and wore a gown
Got no compliments
Back to top

amother
Anemone


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:53 am
What’s jpf?
Back to top

amother
Dill  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:53 am
What in the world is the point of this?
Of course if someone looks beautiful you tell them doesn't matter if your in the street grocery or wedding!
Shiva or funeral not a great place.....
Chasidush for reference but shouldn't all women compliment other women?????
Back to top

amother
  OP  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:56 am
amother Magnolia wrote:
I’m mo and was mother of the bride
Had makeup and hair done and wore a gown
Got no compliments

Is that the norm for you? Did it bother you?
Back to top

amother
  OP  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:56 am
amother Dill wrote:
What in the world is the point of this?
Of course if someone looks beautiful you tell them doesn't matter if your in the street grocery or wedding!
Shiva or funeral not a great place.....
Chasidush for reference but shouldn't all women compliment other women?????

Read the thread. I thought the same as you until I had this conversion with a friend (not chasidish). Apparently not everyone agrees.
Back to top

amother
  Scarlet  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:58 am
amother OP wrote:
I thought so too. Until someone told me it's community dependent and that she didn't get one such compliment at her child's wedding. She'd even be insulted if she'd get such a compliment! That was very interesting to me. Hence the poll.

Hence my question about if I say it differently, not you look so beautiful. I'd say something along the lines of you look stunning, love your dress, what a beautiful simcha.....
But insulted when receiving basic human acknowledgement??? I've never heard of that in the many weddings of the different circles I've attended.
Back to top

amother
  OP  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 11:58 am
amother Anemone wrote:
What’s jpf?

Just plain frum. No specific category.
Back to top

amother
  OP  


 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 12:02 pm
amother Scarlet wrote:
Hence my question about if I say it differently, not you look so beautiful. I'd say something along the lines of you look stunning, love your dress, what a beautiful simcha.....
But insulted when receiving basic human acknowledgement??? I've never heard of that in the many weddings of the different circles I've attended.

No it's all the same in different words. This friend said that if someone would compliment her looks she'd be a bit insulted and think "please respect me more than that"... Point being that looks is not a conversation piece at all in her circles.
Back to top

sequoia




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Oct 14 2024, 12:07 pm
amother OP wrote:
This friend said that if someone would compliment her looks she'd be a bit insulted and think "please respect me more than that"...


This might be a her thing.
Back to top
Page 1 of 4 1  2  3  4  Next Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> The Social Scene -> Entertainment

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Wedding gift - Baltimore
by amother
16 Today at 1:08 pm View last post
How much does a chassidisha wedding cost?
by amother
87 Today at 1:57 am View last post
Wedding dresses
by amother
0 Mon, Nov 11 2024, 10:18 pm View last post
Help me find a flattering gown for siblings wedding
by amother
21 Mon, Nov 11 2024, 6:56 pm View last post
Wedding Outfit for 4 year old boy
by amother
5 Sun, Nov 10 2024, 9:19 am View last post