Anyone have a child with rejection sensitive dysphoria?

amother

OP ↓

Sun, Nov 03 2024, 9:54 am

How do you deal with it? It's heartbreaking to watch on a social level and so frustrating on a parenting level. Any insight appreciated.

amother

Myrtle ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 9:02 am

Yup. Husband and child with ADHD have it.
No advice because I am still trying to figure it out, but lots of love and a building them up!

amother

Charcoal

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 9:47 am

Would you be able to give an example? Trying to figure out if someone has this, it would explain a lot.

amother

Mocha ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 6:36 pm

I have a child with it.

But even more intensely, a husband who has it.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:22 pm

amother Charcoal wrote:

Would you be able to give an example? Trying to figure out if someone has this, it would explain a lot.

https://www.selfloverainbow.co.....oria/

https://mind.help/topic/reject.....oria/

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:27 pm

amother Myrtle wrote:

Yup. Husband and child with ADHD have it.
No advice because I am still trying to figure it out, but lots of love and a building them up!

So hard to build them up because the slightest hint of impatience or annoyance can send them spiraling and undo anything positive you've ever said.

Also even if they do manage to feel safe at home, they can't navigate the normal rough of tumble of kid relationships and are convinced everyone hates them and nobody is interested in them.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:30 pm

amother Tuberose wrote:

What does this mean?

People who are super super sensitive to hints of rejection, or perceived rejection. They can't handle any sort of feedback or criticism, they can react with outbursts or aggression, or internalized self loathing.

amother

↑ Myrtle ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:33 pm

amother OP wrote:

Have you tried therapy?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:34 pm

amother Myrtle wrote:

Have you tried therapy?

No I'm afraid they'll feel criticized 😔

amother

Emerald

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:37 pm

Huh. Never heard this term. My dh has this. It's rotten.

amother

↑ Myrtle ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:47 pm

amother OP wrote:

No I'm afraid they'll feel criticized 😔

Tell them it will help the cope with rejection. Not that there is something wrong with them.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:49 pm

amother Myrtle wrote:

Tell them it will help the cope with rejection. Not that there is something wrong with them.

They can't hear that they're not coping with something. There's nothing wrong with them, everyone just really hates them.

amother

Begonia ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:51 pm

It’s worth letting them get upset to hear they need help. It will take time to help them process it and understand they must get this help. You can’t feel this scared of it, they need help, you need to help them even if they will act like it’s the worst thing on this planet. If you don’t get them help they will just suffer the rest of their lives.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 7:56 pm

amother Begonia wrote:

Are you speaking from experience? My understanding is that such people aren't receptive to therapy either because they feel rejected there as well.

amother

↑ Myrtle ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 8:05 pm

amother OP wrote:

They can't hear that they're not coping with something. There's nothing wrong with them, everyone just really hates them.

You can't tip toe around them being afraid they will be hurt. They will never grow that way and continue thinking they are perfect.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 8:09 pm

amother Myrtle wrote:

You can't tip toe around them being afraid they will be hurt. They will never grow that way and continue thinking they are perfect.

Do you have a child that is like this?

amother

↑ Myrtle ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 8:10 pm

amother OP wrote:

Do you have a child that is like this?

As I stated before I have both a child and husband that have it.
In order to help them grow and learn you can't tip toe.

amother

↑ Begonia ↓

Mon, Nov 04 2024, 8:11 pm

amother OP wrote:

Are you speaking from experience? My understanding is that such people aren't receptive to therapy either because they feel rejected there as well.

Yes my husband is like this. It took so much work to get him to see that help is the answer. And he is so much happier today. He has an excellent therapist that knows how to make him feel safe while also working on his issues.