constant need to be busy with them

octopus

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 6:27 pm

ok, so I'm a sahm and I'm finding the colder season very, very difficult with both my infant and toddler, since it is too cold to stay outdoors for too long. I constantly feel like I have to do something with them in order to maintain my own sanity. I have a hard time sitting on the floor and playing all day long. I always end up being the referee (I.e. keeping my two year old from hurting my baby). And when my two-year-old is playing nicely, my baby crawls over and tries to wreck whatever my 2 year old is doing. I am feeling tremendously frustrated lately, and I find that it has gotten much harder to be a calm parent. I want so much to be a calm parent and not to feel frustration. Even if I don't show my frustration to my kids, I feel that they sense it. Any helpful advice?

octopus

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 6:55 pm

the two year old does entertain himself. Problem is when both are up my two year old entertains himself trying to hurt dd. I think I'm plum out of ideas for them. I need to somehow have a playdate for them everyday, I think, if I can't go outside. Too bad I don't know so many ppl where I live. Sad

flowerpower

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 6:57 pm

How about going to the library once a week? They have toddler time and the older one might like it. I feel bad that you don't know anyone with kids in the neighborhood because your kids would love playdates(and so would you).

Tehilla

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 6:58 pm

well my kids are in school...but you can come 'play' (socialize) with me! maybe the new toys would work for your kids too. Wink

octopus

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:01 pm

I go to the library once a week. I even have one playdate with a friend once a week. But it isn't enough. During the summer, I took my kids to the park twice a day. Once in the early morning, and once in the late afternoon. Now, excluding the days where I have library and a playdate, I feel so helpless. There is nothing to do. It's just too cold for the park. And getting them bundled up ( oh the struggle!) for twenty minutes outside is exhausting for me- but not for them.

Tehilla, I would love to visit, but I think you are too far away. Sad

I drive, but only from flatbush to bp. that's as far as I go.

chaylizi

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:03 pm

my almost 2 year old entertains herself. she entertains herself in my pantry, in her sister's bedroom, in the bathroom, in my drawers.
I'd much rather entertain her.

octopus

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:06 pm

kikavu wrote:

my almost 2 year old entertains herself. she entertains herself in my pantry, in her sister's bedroom, in the bathroom, in my drawers.
I'd much rather entertain her.

tell me about it. When ds entertains himself, somehow my house looks like someone ransacked it.

octopus

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:11 pm

Tehilla wrote:

octopus, I'm not far! really! I drive to BP, Willi, Monsey...it's super easy to get to me from Flatbush.

yeah, but I'm super scared to drive on anything that is busier than ocean parkway. Flatbush avenue scares me. so does the prospect park expressway.

Tehilla

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:14 pm

bleh there's easier ways than that. I take empire to caton/ocean...I cross over the expressway and coney island.

aren't those close to you?

takes me 30 minutes to get to BP with good traffic.

octopus

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:16 pm

I'm not sure exactly what streets you are talking about (ocean and coney I am familiar with). plus if I don't know where I'm going, I panic while I'm driving. I didn't drive to a Manhattan beach imamother meet for the same reason. and that is way closer.

gold21

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:16 pm

Can you put the baby in a spot where they can't reach each other? Let's say you put a childrens gate between the two of them. They could still see each other but couldn't touch each other.

Also, you are lucky that your older kid know how to entertain himself!! My son doesn't quite have a grasp on that yet.

Also, about having to bundle the kids like crazy to go out for twenty minutes: can you cut out any of the bundling? My 2 and a half year old is good with just a hooded sweatshirt and coat on a decent day (not like today, way too windy and frigid). My infant is good with a snowsuit and hat on a decent day. I know lots of ppl are into over-bundling their kids. I have found that my kids prefer the least amount of bundling that is still weather appropriate.

Raisin

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:22 pm

even just going to the grocery store for a few items can be a fun trip for a 2 year old, and breaks up the day. (I was in a supermarket in france where they had tiny sized trolleys for kids. All my kids had a blast with them.)

my ds loves picking out fruit and other things.

octopus

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:23 pm

hehehe, my house is the house of baby gates. problem is, dd (the crawling infant) cries if she is not in the same "section" as everyone else. Ds does the same thing.

octopus

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 7:24 pm

Raisin wrote:

hmmmm....that's an idea. I have a kid's sized baby stroller for ds. Though I can totally see him stuffing his stroller with cookies and throwing a temper tantrum if I don't buy them. But this is an idea I can work with. thanks.

gryp

Thu, Jan 08 2009, 10:07 pm

Octopus, you're most welcome here too. My 2 yr old would love to have a partner in crime.

My kids know, anyway, that certain things they take out only when the baby (6 months) is napping. Otherwise they have to play on the table or in their own room if they don't want the baby to get to it. My 6 month old crawls everywhere, gets into everything.