I am an INFJ/enneagram 4 AMA

amother

Opal

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 2:11 pm

I’m an infj and dh is estp… good times!

amother

Blush

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 2:19 pm

I am also the opposite of dh. I'm and enfp and he's a intj. We clash alot

amother

Lightyellow

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:03 pm

SuperWify wrote:

I have a nightly downtime for myself that is yahrieg v’al yaavor

INFJ here.
Definitely this. My phone is set to turn on Do Not Disturb mode automatically at a certain time every night. I need 1-3 hours of downtime every single night.
What I do?
Journal, meditate, listen to music, cry and sometimes daven.
I feel lost, misplaced, disconnected and extreme emptiness when I don’t get to have my downtime.

amother

Butterscotch

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:27 pm

amother OP wrote:

Hi all
I am a Myers’s Briggs infj/ enneagram 4w5.
Happy to chat about it!

So am I!

amother

Hydrangea

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:31 pm

this:I feel lost, misplaced, disconnected and extreme emptiness when I don’t get to have my downtime.
and I wish it weren't so because it clashes with the demands made on me irl

giftedmom

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:39 pm

amother OP wrote:

How do you navigate life being so self/other aware and deep?
What’s your best hack lol 😆

My main one is grounding.

Please offer yours!

Boundaries boundaries boundaries
I learned those to survive at a very early age

giftedmom

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:40 pm

amother Navy wrote:

Hi cousin!
I am an INFP/4 with a 5 wing

Hi twin😊
It’s weird being me. Logical yet spiritual/empathetic at the same time

Chayalle

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:44 pm

amother Blush wrote:

I'm an enfp (possibly j)
I have a love hate thing with 4s. I can easily spot them and I'm attracted to them like a magnet but after a while, I hate them. I find them pretentious and very tiring. I also wish I were a 4. I guess I want to be special but I can't admit it and I'm not nearly creative enough in the raw talent department but I'm creative in my thinking. Paradoxically, I tend to be black and white sometimes too. I think I'm a two but I'm not sure. If I were to pick any number I wish I would be, it would be 3. Then 4. I know 4s love enneagrams so my question is: how can I find my type? I can't separate " the real me" from the me that has been forced to adapt based on life circumstances. The online tests are rubbish. I try to read about each type and get a feeling for which one I most identify with but I end up with a two while I don't 100 percent identity with that either. I also have some 4 and 5. And If you know anything about horoscopes, I am a true Aquarius.

Interesting. I'm a 2/ESFJ and married to a 4/INFP. I don't particularly think any type is more special than any other. We each have our gifts (and NOT....). Maalos and Chisronos to each, no one better than the next till you do something with what you're given. I have heard that there are people who think 4's are something more up there, and I've also heard that alot of people "misdiagnose" (just kidding) themselves as a 4 and are not the real thing. I believe my DH is (and yep, he got me into it.) And I don't get what the big deal is, anyway.

DH is definitely the creative/romantic one in the marriage, and I'm very grounded, which I guess is a good thing. But I also have creative aspects, not in the same way as DH...different areas. But I'm definitely a 2, and not a 4 at all.

I also think we all have different aspects of each type, because we have our wings, and we also have our points to which we develop ourselves, so we incorporate alot into ourselves (self-development) if we are healthy people. So I'm a 2 with a 3 wing, I also have some 8 in me (I'm an Aries. Doesn't that go by birthday anyway? Everything I've read about Aries is definitely me....but there are also subsets, and I'm the last Aries type) and a dose of 7, some 5....

Chayalle

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:45 pm

giftedmom wrote:

Boundaries boundaries boundaries
I learned those to survive at a very early age

But I think alot of 4's actually struggle with boundaries.
Maybe those that are INFP's more than others.

daagahminayin

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:57 pm

amother OP wrote:

So what’s you guys best tricks?

Self-acceptance and self-love. Loving all the parts of myself, telling them they are all welcome to be here. Energy healing, giving myself time to process my emotions. Nature. Meditation. Davening. Learning Torah I really connect with. Doing things that make me happy. And getting out of myself and helping others.

Learning to accept that I’m not like everyone else. It’s lonely, but it’s ok. Embracing connection with others when it comes. First and foremost learning to connect with myself and Hashem.

giftedmom

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:58 pm

Chayalle wrote:

But I think alot of 4's actually struggle with boundaries.
Maybe those that are INFP's more than others.

I actually scored INTP on some tests so maybe I’m a bit of both idk. My five wing is pretty strong.

daagahminayin

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 3:59 pm

My question for you: how did you work out you were an INFJ? Did you take a test or did you study the cognitive functions? There is sometimes a big difference between the two.

amother

Peony

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 4:20 pm

I’m an infj-t and enneagram 2
Feeling very understood here 😀

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 4:57 pm

SuperWify wrote:

I have a nightly downtime for myself that is yahrieg v’al yaavor

Totally!

Lollllllllllll!

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 5:00 pm

LovesHashem wrote:

What do you mean how? I love it this way, can't imagine it any other way.

You gotta teach me your tricks.
If you don’t have burnout, get frustrated that you are the only mature one in the room etc.

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 5:04 pm

daagahminayin wrote:

All these definitely resonate. I do most of them too.
I do somatic movement to relieve stress, journaling, prayer, alone time, learning hashkafa, meditation, and try to socialize with non toxic people, letting myself be kind because it’s a great part of my personality, and trying to accept others where they are at although it is lonely to be the only mature one sigh.

What’s your best energy healing tip? (Needing it this yom tov around some troubled people).

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 5:05 pm

daagahminayin wrote:

My question for you: how did you work out you were an INFJ? Did you take a test or did you study the cognitive functions? There is sometimes a big difference between the two.

I studied the functions.

Super interesting!

amother

Carnation

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 5:09 pm

amother Chicory wrote:

Same!

Me too! Should we create our own AMA? Wink

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 5:11 pm

amother Blush wrote:

A healthy four will have balanced their need for individuality and find self acceptance to a degree that they don’t need to accentuate their individuality all that much at all and what you are left with is their kindness and hopefully easy going ‘ness’ if that’s a word.

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 5:17 pm

giftedmom wrote:

Boundaries boundaries boundaries
I learned those to survive at a very early age

True. That was my 1st step toward self awareness.