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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Infants
newmom1987
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 Tue, Aug 26 2014, 4:57 pm
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I am pregnant and due in December, B'ezras Hashem. I have done some shopping for the baby and I can't believe the amount of things I am being told I "need". A swing, a bouncer, a pack and play, a stroller, an umbrella stroller, a snap and go... I wanted to know from some more experienced mothers what they DIDN'T need. The list is getting long. What did you buy or receive and end up not using or using very little? I'd like to narrow the list down a little bit if possible!
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kb
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 5:05 pm
You don't need a snap n go AND a stroller - 1 is enough.
You don't need a pac n play unless you're planning on going away somewhere that doesn't give a crib (unlikely IME)
You can make do with a swing OR a bouncer (you don't need both) I'd wait for that, though - you don't need it for the first month for sure.
For when the baby is born, you'll need:
a method to get the baby home from the hospital (car seat), diapers, wipes, a LOT of onesies, lanolin cream (if you're planning on nursing), some clothing, a blanket or two, someplace for the baby to sleep (basinet or crib - or even a dresser drawer pulled out!), pacifiers/bottles/formula/pump (depending on your plan. Have a manual pump regardless I think)
Good to have but you can survive without it:
swaddle blankets, receiving blankets, burp cloths, toys
You will need within a few months:
Bouncer/swing/gymini, stroller
I'm probably missing stuff, but that's the basics.
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morah
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 5:14 pm
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I don't think it's a matter of You need X but you don't need Y. A lot can vary based on individual circumstances. Do you plan on spending lots of time with your parents/ILs? Then a pack n play is a good idea. Plan on keeping mostly to the home base? Then maybe not. An umbrella strolle is definitely not necessary till the baby is older. Swigs and bouncers- you probably don't need both, but you won't know which one is for you till the baby comes. A relative lent me a very fancy swing, and my first baby hated it. I'm so glad I hadn't bought it! Got a bouncer and he liked it much better. Borrowed the same swing for my second baby who love it- for about 3 weeks, then he too was more partial to the bouncer. But I've had friends for whom the swing was a lifesaver. So I would suggest borrowing and seeing which one the baby prefers.
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Lady Godiva
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 5:18 pm
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I got one of those garbage pails for diapers. Ugh! Dirty diapers belong outside in the trash can.
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busydev
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 5:20 pm
you dont need it all and you dont need it all at once.
we waited till we needed stuff and then got it. I found a snap n go to be very useful for the first 6mo or so till the infant seat was to heavy. I happen to have a few diff strollers for diff needs
(I figured better buy 2 cheaper strollers that fit my different needs then compromising on them and buying 1 more expensive one- for example I have a baby trend jogger for outside walking and a umbrella stroller to keep in the car for travelling and quick shopping trips. both together were cheaper then say a city mini which has a small footprint (so can fit in the car for long distance travel to the IL's for y"t etc) and a decent outdoor push. the umbrella stroller is smaller then the city mini no question and the jogger pushes amazing outside for when DS was walked a mile each day to the sitter- but that was my cheshbon you have to make your own)
but either way I think you do need a stroller once you arent shlepping the baby around in the infant stroller... but that can be down the line. or you can get a travel set stroller that the car seat snaps into-tho most of the time they arent the greatest stroller in push or size. (they also have umbrella strollers that the carseat can snap into- and the stroller reclines etc- costs more then my $20 BRU umbrella but def has its uses- check out chicco I know they have one)
I did use my swing in the first month. for both my kids. my 1st I used for the first few months, my second not so much cause he wasnt safe from his brother in the swing so I couldnt just leave him there. I did use the bouncer on the table more for him tho.
pack n play we dont have yet... tho I borrow from my parents when we go to the IL's
also diff people have different uses and ways of doing things. so you can also buy as you need vs buy everything and hope it all gets used... even with diff kids I used diff things more or less just because the kid didnt like it as well (my older DS loved the jumparoo my friend loaned us... #2 not so much) or because circumstances changed (job commute meant no more walking to the sitter so the jogger wasnt as useful anymore) etc etc
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groovy1224
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 5:28 pm
A lot of regretted purchases happen when first time parents go out and buy EVERYTHING right when baby is born, or earlier, as if target and amazon are closing up shop. It's not as fun, but it's really best to buy items individually as YOU find you need them. If you're happy with you're snap n go, you can skip the stroller for a while. If your baby naps and plays happily in her bouncer, you may not need the swing that your neighbor swore by. Your other friend may tell you the diaper genie was a waste of money, but you may hate taking out the trash so often.
I was lucky in that I didn't have anything that I absolutely hated or never used. But that was because I bought what I needed, and researched things so I knew it wouldn't be a dud. Don't let anyone tell you what YOU need. Your baby will tell you 
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morah
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 5:45 pm
| Lady Godiva wrote: | | I got one of those garbage pails for diapers. Ugh! Dirty diapers belong outside in the trash can. |
Perfect example of differen needs for different circumstances. If you're living in a 3rd floor walk-up, it's pretty much a necessity. If you're in a building with a garbage chute or in a house, then you don't need it.
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Fave
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 6:16 pm
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Jumping in here - was wondering if a nursing pillow is a must have item and if you would recommend having it before birth
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out-of-towner
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 6:39 pm
| Fave wrote: | | Jumping in here - was wondering if a nursing pillow is a must have item and if you would recommend having it before birth |
It's totally personal. I found it really helpful. Maybe see if u can borrow one at first until u decide if it works for u. If u live in far rockaway or 5towns I would be happy to lend you one to try out as long as your not due when I am.
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amother
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 6:46 pm
for strollers:
buy or borrow a snap n go (since its your first I say make the investment and buy) and wait on purchasing a stroller. Look around shop ask people etc. You dont need a real stroller until 6 months
(however, on my 4th - I should have done it with my 3rd - I allowed myself the luxury of a bassinet attachment to a stroller. I have the stroller as my house stroller and use it all the time. However, it was a luxury for my first)
personally using a stroller and bouncy seat now. However, the bouncy seat is borrowed, and this swing is a replacement of the swing from baby #1.
I agree with the advice of buy as you need.
amazon prime has been helpful with this baby. When I noticed it was hard washing the bottles with the brush I got from the drying rack, I bought a new brush and it was here 2 days later. When I realized the bottle nipples needed to be replaced I ordered and had them 2 days later. On wednesdays I check to see where I'm at with diapers and order if necessary and I have them before shabbos.
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morah
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 6:54 pm
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Yes, Amazon is your friend! If you don't already have prime, you can sign up for Amazon Mom- which is a year of free prime.
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LittleDucky
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 7:10 pm
| morah wrote: | | Yes, Amazon is your friend! If you don't already have prime, you can sign up for Amazon Mom- which is a year of free prime. |
I don't think it's a year of free prime. But for free you get a bunch of things that can help. Like the shipping. The bonus stuff like a free kindle book don't come with amazon mom but it's still a great benefit! Plus it gives you 20% on diaper subscriptions!
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LittleDucky
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 7:30 pm
Bouncy seats and swings may not both be necessary. See if you can borrow one to see what you LO likes. Every kid is different. Some like one and not the other. Some live in them and some can't sit in it for more than 5 minutes. Good luck!
All you really need are a few clothes, burp cloths/rags, diapers/wipes, a car seat, a place for the baby to sleep (crib or pack n play etc). Try to borrow everything else until you can figure out what works best for you.
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mummiedearest
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 7:45 pm
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rather than buy things, see if you can get lightly used items for free. check out free cycle, craigslist, and ask friends whose kids are a bit bigger. I found that I needed different gear for different kids, and these things are bulky to store. I gave most of my stuff away to friends. if friends didn't need it, I found others in the community to take things.
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ckk
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 7:50 pm
Me too. I wasn't planning on co-sleeping but if did for at least the first year.
It was a bulky piece of furniture taking up space in my tiny apt.
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seeker
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:11 pm
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Varies depending on lifestyle/preferences. The only real truth is that you definitely don't need EVERYTHING. If money is an issue, there is a lot you can borrow or get used with no consequence. If space is an issue, there is even more you can just skip.
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morah
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:37 pm
| LittleDucky wrote: | | I don't think it's a year of free prime. But for free you get a bunch of things that can help. Like the shipping. The bonus stuff like a free kindle book don't come with amazon mom but it's still a great benefit! Plus it gives you 20% on diaper subscriptions! |
Free 2 day shipping = Prime.
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FranticFrummie
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:52 pm
Fancy little outfits. DD never wore them! For the first year she lived in pajamas. Stock up on sleep sacks, they are a life saver.
I found a Boppy pillow to be really valuable, and I wish I'd bought two.
I was planning on baby wearing as much as possible, so I had several styles of slings. DD hated every single one of them, and screamed non stop. She preferred to be in her car seat, where she could sit and watch me moving around the house. She also despised swaddling.
Basically, I agree with everyone who says "play it by ear, and buy as you go."
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miami85
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Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:54 pm
There were many things that I thought I had wasted money on, only to find that I did find it useful--eventually. Many things either aren't necessary, or are not necessary right away. Every one and every baby has different needs and preferences. My kids didn't mind cold wipes--so for me a wipe warmer would have been unnecessary.
Look around to see if you can buy things second hand--like a snap n' go, bouncy seat, maybe even a pack n' play (seeing as they more trackable in terms of recalls, and don't have many pieces that can get lost in transit and unlikely to have been in an "accident" like a car seat). See if any relatives have an umbrella stroller that you can inherit.
Yes I second the motion that it depends on your individual circumstances. For example, I live in an apartment building, so it's not convenient to constantly put diapers in the outside garbage, so I find a diaper pail very helpful. We did go away for Shabbos a lot, so having a pack n' play was very useful. I liked having a bouncy seat because my babies got bored just laying there so they liked having another place to go and play.
Then there were things that I bought and were useful, then I thought I didn' t need but then found a new use for. When my oldest was born I didn't have enough for a fancy pump, so I just got a hand pump for "when I needed it". Before I went back to work we managed to afford a fancier pump, so I thought that my hand pump wouldn' t be used much. In the end, for quick pumps, I actually like my hand pump better, it can be used on Shabbos/yom tov if the need arises and is quick and easier to clean.
Some toys I bought for my kids but they didn't take to right away, but then some time later became someone's favorite toy.
Many people find that their kids don't sleep in a crib, so they get rid of it. My son didn't start sleeping in a crib until 8 months (when we found he wasn't sleeping as well in his pack n' play)--that' when we got one for him.
A good book that I found that helped weed out the wants and needs, and also helped figure out if you were getting a good bargain for your buck was a book called Baby Bargains
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