Dressing a toddler boy up as a girl

amother

Ivory

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 11:32 am

I did not wish at all that my son was a girl. I simply thought it was adorable for Purim. And it was. He loved prancing around in a dress like his older sister.

acemom

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 11:35 am

Quote:

........

I think it's important for a mother to ask herself what her motivation is?

Does she wish, deep down, that she had a little girl, and this is some way of fulfilling that fantasy for herself?

Because if that's the case, then dressing him as a girl is disrespectful to him, imo.

.....

In my opinion, I don't think people who do this do it for any subconscious reason.

Would you apply the same reasoning to, um, dressing a kid up as a soldier? Batman? Rubik's cube? Confused

(People do stuff in the spirit of v'nahafoch hu. To some it just means dressup as something you aren't all year. )

amother

Scarlet

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:28 pm

I would have normally thought it was cute. However after reading about how ppl dress their kids and let them act in opposite genders because the kid feels like they are suppose to be the opposite gender it just totally grossed me out.

amother

Jade

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:28 pm

It's amazing how things I wouldn't think twice about get dissected in Imamother.

I mean it in a positive way - it's fascinating to see how people have such strong opinions on matters I would never think were objectionable.

saw50st8

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:30 pm

My 2 year old wants to be Elsa for Purim. He's going to be Yoda, but I don't think it's a big deal if he wore an Elsa costume.

tigerwife

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:40 pm

Personally, I'm more disturbed by adult men dressing up as women, complete with tights and stuffed undergarments.

I don't think it's strange for a long-haired boy to dress up as a girl (usually at that stage they often are mistaken by girls anyway if they are waiting for an upsheren!)

amother

Apricot

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:42 pm

We actually asked our rav one year and was told it is not allowed.
Now that I'm a little older I'm glad we never did it, I just saw a picture of a bunch of little boys dressed up as grown women, and it was really creepy.

MrsDash

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 1:50 pm

I think I told this story here once before. One year my brother dressed up like a woman on Purim in Israel. He walked around telstone delivering shaloch manos that way. Some people were definitely confused and taken aback, but most laughed so hard, they couldn't breathe.

WhatFor

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:08 pm

amother wrote:

Someone in my family dressed her toddler son as a Snow White.

My first reaction was: seriously? So gay...

Gay denotes zexual attraction. There's no reason to be thinking of zexual attraction when looking at a toddler.

amother

Jade

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:09 pm

WhatFor wrote:

Gay denotes zexual attraction. There's no reason to be thinking of zexual attraction when looking at a toddler.

This! Why is everything sexualized? Why is a 2 year old's Purim costume laden with s-xual meaning???

mommy3b2c

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:12 pm

Laiya wrote:

This is exactly why it's a problem, and I think why some people find it disturbing.

I think it's important for a mother to ask herself what her motivation is?

Does she wish, deep down, that she had a little girl, and this is some way of fulfilling that fantasy for herself?

Because if that's the case, then dressing him as a girl is disrespectful to him, imo.

Full disclosure: I desperately wished that my youngest brother had been a girl, and I remember doing the same to him embarrassed

Now it just so happens that I am dying for a daughter, but the year I dressed my baby boy as a poodle girl, I did it because I couldn't find an Elvis Costune in his size. It was adorable! Everyone get a grip.

agreer

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:13 pm

WhatFor wrote:

Gay denotes zexual attraction. There's no reason to be thinking of zexual attraction when looking at a toddler.

I think she meant "gay" as in a man acting like a woman...I.e. not in the strict, technical sense of the word.

I also think this is a horrible, idoitic practice that is not "cute" in the least.

I would not any boys, toddler or older, dress in a girly costume be it Esther, Elsa, or even Vashti.

I've seen men dressed as women at chassunas for "shtick" and it is gross. Some people obviously think it's hysterical, or they wouldn't do it, but I do not go for it, and I don't go for little boys dressed up as girls on purim. Highly inappropriate, no matter how badly "they" want to dress up. Even worse when the parents/older sibs do it for them.

mommy3b2c

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:15 pm

saw50st8 wrote:

My 2 year old wants to be Elsa for Purim. He's going to be Yoda, but I don't think it's a big deal if he wore an Elsa costume.

Lol. My baby is being yoda, but over the last few days, I was regretting that I Didn't make him princess leiha. It's Purim!

glamourmom

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:20 pm

amother wrote:

This! Why is everything sexualized? Why is a 2 year old's Purim costume laden with s-xual meaning???

THIS!! is this attitude prevalent everywhere? I only come across it on imamother, at least to this extent.

Stars

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:31 pm

glamourmom wrote:

THIS!! is this attitude prevalent everywhere? I only come across it on imamother, at least to this extent.

Huh? Find me one person who would do this for Halloween without raising some eyebrows.

Laiya

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:41 pm

mommy3b2c wrote:

There's a difference between dressing him as a poodle girl (ie, a character), and a girl version of himself, imo.

Last edited by Laiya on Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:43 pm; edited 1 time in total