Do you strip the beds when you're a guest?

amother

Purple

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:00 pm

Whenever we go away for Shabbos, I always strip my bed before leaving, and I taught DH (who never did so when he was single) to do the same, and to also strip the kids' beds while I pack up.

Lately we've had several different guests from all different walks of life as guests at our house, and DH pointed out to me that not one of them stripped the beds.

I'm just wondering what the norm is. What do you do, and does it make a difference if you're staying our your parents, family, friends, etc.?

tichellady

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:04 pm

I usually do. I don't at my parents because they have a full time housekeeper that comes who will deal with it and my prefers to just leave the beds made until she comes.

water_bear88

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:12 pm

I'd ask, personally. As a single I always brought my own sheets. Now at family, I've discovered there's a chance they'd rather keep the sheets on to keep dust off and only change them shortly before they have new visitors.

amother

Coffee

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:18 pm

water_bear88 wrote:

Just wondering- did you ever actually show up at someone's house where there were no sheets on the bed? I would think its really weird if someone showed up with their own bedsheets.

amother

Wine

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:22 pm

I'd ask. Some people prefer to have it all stripped and in the laundry basket. Others don't want the laundry room overloaded and want to do it in their own time, or they are embarrassed by their old stained mattresses and would rather you didn't strip all the linen.

amother

Cerulean

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:25 pm

amother wrote:

Just wondering- did you ever actually show up at someone's house where there were no sheets on the bed? I would think its really weird if someone showed up with their own bedsheets.

As someone who gets asked to host a lot (often random strangers) I would LOVE if guests bought their own sheets, and put them on, and removed them!

Obviously an unrealistic expectation, but making beds up and washing the sheets is a big extra job.

My guests rarely strip the sheets though. We do when we are guests but we usually only stay at family.

water_bear88

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:29 pm

amother wrote:

Just wondering- did you ever actually show up at someone's house where there were no sheets on the bed? I would think its really weird if someone showed up with their own bedsheets.

Absolutely. I totally understand that people who are willing to host 3-4 seminary or college-age girls for a Shabbos may have an easier time if they don't have to wash an extra 3-4 sets of sheets. My washer is a decent-sized one for this country, btw, and I can't do more than 2 complete twin sets at once (fitted and top sheets).

tichellady

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:30 pm

amother wrote:

Just wondering- did you ever actually show up at someone's house where there were no sheets on the bed? I would think its really weird if someone showed up with their own bedsheets.

Totally normal in Israel. I always did this when I was in seminary and it was expected

Iymnok

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:55 pm

I always strip them and fold the blankets. I leave the sheets in a neat pile.
It's the least I could do for the hosts.
Last time they asked me to bring sheets for the kids. I was totally fine with it.

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 1:56 pm

I ask the host "where would you like me to put the linens?" The response is usually "on top of the washer would be great, thanks." Occasionally, someone would prefer the beds to be left for the housekeeper rather than having a big pile of sheets in the laundry room.

I would prefer my guests to strip the sheets than to re-make the beds in the morning. Equal work for the guest, but much easier for me.

Bringing your own sheets is unheard of in my circles in the US, unless you are camping or something like that. From Imamother, I understand that it is expected in Israel.

Last edited by cm on Thu, Mar 09 2017, 2:36 pm; edited 1 time in total

cnc

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 2:13 pm

I ask the hostess what she prefers because sometimes I don't want my own guests stripping the linen. If I'm not ready to wash them immediately, I don't want them laying around and taking up space.

WastingTime

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 2:14 pm

When I was single I did, at my parents- I do. Anywhere else (siblings) we take sheets with. I don't expect them to wash (or even have) an extra 7 sets of sheets for us. That is the norm I think at least in our family

animeme

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 2:17 pm

water_bear88 wrote:

This. Sometimes I know I won't get the linens done for a couple of days, and it's easier for them to be on the guest beds than on bundles. And sometimes the room gets used for other things and looks neater with made beds. Until the hostess gets to them. Also, some people don't like others doing it for them.

I like to say, "I often strip the bed when I leave. Would you like me to do it?" So they don't feel like saying "yes" to you is putting you out.

Maybe My Family

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 2:29 pm

I ask the host what they prefer ..... like others have said if it won't be washed right away they may prefer you leave it . It is easier to strip when ready to wash than have it lying around in the way .

agreer

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 3:07 pm

WastingTime wrote:

Yet they happen to have 7 extra beds to put the linen on? How does that work?

I personally do not strip the linen b/c no one ever taught me to. I prefer my guests do not strip the linen b/c I don't want to be rushed in doing the laundry, but I do think it's nice of them to offer.

ohmygosh

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 3:25 pm

I always strip the linen (and taught DH to do the same) and leave it in a neat folded pile on the bed, so its not a mess. The only exception is if they specifically tell me not to strip the beds, and then I won't.

Last edited by ohmygosh on Thu, Mar 09 2017, 4:41 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Sapphire

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 3:29 pm

Wine

Post Today at 4:22 pm
I'd ask. Some people prefer to have it all stripped and in the laundry basket. Others don't want the laundry room overloaded and want to do it in their own time, or they are embarrassed by their old stained mattresses and would rather you didn't strip all the linen.

This.

martina

Thu, Mar 09 2017, 3:30 pm

I always do, as my mother taught me from when I was young and stayed away from home the first time.
She also taught me to always fold the linen so that its easier to put in the washer.
I once stayed by a family for a lengthier stay and changed linen after a while. When my hostess saw the folded usd linen she made a face and said "you cant just fold used linen and put it back in the closet. You do know they are dirty and need to be washed, dont you?!" made feel like I was the fool.
She didnt understand my mothers logic and seemed to think I was only looking to save face.
Funny story... Smile