Why don’t (most) frum people have dogs/pets?

amother

Burgundy

Tue, Feb 13 2018, 6:52 pm

HonesttoGod wrote:

This.
Dogs and cats are not cheap to have. Many frum families have many kids = tuition, groceries, YT, expenses...dogs just don't come into the picture.

Also people are not really accepting of people who get a pet and then have to rehome it when it doesn’t work out. There are no no matter what’s but my children in my house. I’d rather not have to worry about having to get rid of the cat that didn’t work out for my family.

amother

Chocolate

Tue, Feb 13 2018, 8:21 pm

There's a lot of complex halacha pertaining pets especially dogs. The Talmud states that it's issur to own a evil dog and that a dog that barks can cause a pregnant women to miscarry. I think according to Rambam any dog is its not permissible. And some teach us that if you own a dog it needs to be chained all the time.
So there is some reason behind it, and I guess some people are more machmer on these rulings

icebreaker

Tue, Feb 13 2018, 8:24 pm

Oh I love dogs! I do understand why some people don’t want any. They can be hard work. But my kids and I just love them. Now that we’re moving into a house, we plan on adopting a lot of dogs lol. Plus my ex has a dog that stays with us sometimes. I’ll have more dogs than kids lol. And while I love my children, sometimes I like the dogs more 🤫

Mommyg8

Tue, Feb 13 2018, 8:25 pm

There are a lot of halachos regarding animals which makes owning a pet complicated, but of course not impossible.

You have to feed your pet before you eat, your pet is muktzah on Shabbos, and pet food can be problematic. Anyways, I have a phobia of anything with fur. Only one grandparent went through the Holocaust, so I don't think it's that.

amother

Orange

Tue, Feb 13 2018, 8:59 pm

The nazi using dogs against the Jewish people is just a copycat of dogs being used against Ashkenazi Jews for generations before that.

The Talmud BAva kama speaks negatively about raising dogs. It says that is permissible to keep certain dogs that are useful in preventing infestation of vermins. it also states that dogs must be chained and those who raise them are cursed.

The zohar says that evil in the world is like a vicious dog on a long leash.

The Mishna Torah states a dog must be bound but the Shulchan Aruch takes a less restrictive approach.

Rabbi Jacob Emden says that people who keep dogs for pleasure, are behaving behavior of
the uncircumcised.

Now you may disagree, and some poskim may be on the same page as you, but respect, respect, respect.

We were respectful of our frum neighbor who owned a German shepherd and took it as a matter of fact
This is in a 95 percent frum block in Brooklyn.
(My mother saved all our supper chicken bones and send it over to the frum bearded, white shirted dog owner. He was thrilled to feed the dog kosher food.)

Now, this does not mean it is not ok for you to keep a dog.

But people who learn Bava Kama and Mishne Torah and are connected for generations to Jewish teachings are often not too comfortable with dogs.

Again it is ok for you to have a dog. and it may be 100 percent permissible, but allow us to be
the way we are.

naturalmom5

Tue, Feb 13 2018, 9:24 pm

For everyone posting these nauseatingly self-righteous posts how you put the energy and effort into children, husb, family blah blah ..

I have 2 questions.

1) How come in Baltimore and places like that I have seen plenty of people with busy lives and large families , quite often with less money and resources than other frum communities, have dogs and cats.

2) If its simply a matter of time and energy, why is there such animosity towards dogs and cats in Lakewood. One lady told me there was cats in her yard that were terrorizing her. You would think it was a tiger, they were just adorable kittens..

amother

Yellow

Tue, Feb 13 2018, 9:30 pm

naturalmom5 wrote:

One lady told me there was cats in her yard that were terrorizing her. You would think it was a tiger, they were just adorable kittens..

The last time I did catsitting for my friend , her cat was in an awful mood and hurt me! This is the cat whom I'd fed breakfast and dinner to all week long! And cuddled with and cleaned its litter box and tended to it with loving care!
Vent over.

Adorable-looking kittens are not so adorable when their moods strike.

amother

Wheat

Tue, Feb 13 2018, 11:00 pm

There are a few frum families in my neighborhood that have dogs. DH would get a dog in a heartbeat if I was ok with it, but I have no interest in taking care of a dog and I know it would primarily fall on me no matter what promises my kids make. I also have one child who is allergic to cats and dogs and a toddler who loves animals from a distance but is terrified of them up close and personal. She most assuredly did not get that from her parents or older siblings whose favorite place is a petting zoo.

Iymnok

Tue, Feb 13 2018, 11:19 pm

We have a parakeet and a turtle. Nearly no upkeep cost.

I was petrified of dogs as a kid. Then I slept over by a friend who had a black lab (who was later put to sleep for jumping the fence and biting a lady) and a part husky, part wolf. She was big, soft, and calm. I decided to overcome my fear, and I did.
(All my grandparents were born in the us between the wars.)

Debbie

Wed, Feb 14 2018, 2:24 am

[quote="watergirl"]I am a life long dog owner as well as many other small pocket pets. I cant inagine my life without my dog and I dont want to try. I dont feel it takes a lot of work, and we have to walk her because we dont have a fenced yard! We all take turns, it forces us to get exersize and there are many other health benefits. Its not work if you love it. And we love it. So no work.

As to the fear, its taught. The nazi excuse only works for ashkenazi jews who were in Europe. I dont think that makes up even a third of American Jews today. So many American Jews, like my family, immegrated to this country before WW1. No nazis. No dogs. And sefardim - also no nazi dogs.

I have had neighbors teach their kids to stay away from my “scary dog who bites”. Ummm no she doesnt. She literally doesnt even bark. So what do you think your kids will learn if you tell them to stay away from “scary dogs”??!!

I can't imagine life without my cats, we got our first one when the neighbours who owned her moved away and left her in the garden, our other one is from a rescue shelter.
Just to point out one thing, contrary to what some of us have been told that Sephardim didn't suffer in the Holocaust, in actual fact thousands of Sephardim were also murdered.
I learned this on a J Roots trip to Poland from someone who has studied Jewish history in depth.
Hopefully your neighbours kids will realise at some stage that your dog is not a threat and will not pass dog fear on to their own kids in the future.

moonstone

Wed, Feb 14 2018, 3:18 am

Squishy wrote:

We asked our Rabbi about getting a dog. He said that if even one neighbor is uncomfortable, then we can't get one. I live in a chassidish area with neighbors with extreme phobias of dogs.

Why is that a question for a rabbi???

I love our dog, she's a real sweetheart. There's something about petting her that's very calming- and she loves it, too.

amother

Blue

Wed, Feb 14 2018, 3:28 am

naturalmom5 wrote:

I live in Baltimore and have a dog. Many frum families here have dogs or cats, you're correct. One reason a lot of us have dogs is because of the crime - the local police suggested getting a dog as a way of deterring break ins. My dog sits on the sofa and looks out the window all day. So when people come by during the day to “case the joint” and pick out houses to target later, my house is known for having a dog, and they skip it. Crime is high in Baltimore.
Like water girl said, the cost is honestly not as high as people think it is. A bag of dog food a month. Depending on the type of food you buy, its not anton of money. At MOST, for the fancy dog food (which Indont buy!), its $75 for a 50 lb bag. I spend $30 for the 50lb bag and feed my dog 1 cup, 3x day. That bag lasts a long time. Its really not a lot of money. Dont pick a breed that needs regular grooming and you wont have to pay a groomer! I also dont think dogs need all the time that people think they need. But, with large families and lots of kids, thats a lot of people to help with the dog.

FranticFrummie

Wed, Feb 14 2018, 3:37 am

I have a cat and a dog that I love. I've never been without a pet for as long as I can remember.

I also totally respect people who are not animal lovers or allergic. If anyone comes to my home and has a problem, the pets go into my bedroom with the door closed.

People before pets!

It's interesting, Nahariya is the doggiest city I've ever lived in. It seems like everyone has at least one dog, and often more, yet most people live in apartments. Every day it's a parade of dog walkers past my window. It's fun to see what type of people have what breed of dog.