 |
|
 |
 |
|
|
Forum
-> Household Management
-> Finances
|
amother
Pearl
|
 Wed, Mar 17 2021, 11:57 am
Your amazing op. Hashem should bentch you. But in meantime don't agonise and take help from the beautiful Imas who have offered. U can pass the money on when yours comes in.
This is when we are the best of the best people.
Wish I could offer but u myself am not in the best place parnasa wise.
Yeshuahs for us all
| |
|
| Back to top |
 0
 11
|
RGoldblum
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 12:07 pm
I’ll also donate if you are willing to take it! PayPal? Not sure if you have zelle in your country?
ETA I can also email you an Amazon gift card if that’s easier for you
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
5
|
Raisin
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 12:16 pm
|
I'm happy to paypal you and you can send it back when your money comes in. Or pass on to someone else!
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
6
|
|
amother
Firebrick
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 12:20 pm
|
Davening for you. What a stressful situation to be in! I see you're uncomfortable taking money, maybe anyone who sees this thread can say a perek tehillim instead. Please keep us updated!! (Maybe consider a loan until after pesach??)
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
3
|
|
amother
Goldenrod
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 12:32 pm
HUGS!!!
If it helps, I have been in your situation more than once! I know it feels awful, but hubby has told those who owe us that we need the money for food (or, back when we still had cc, if the guy wasn’t going to pay us could he please at least pay the late fees for us because we had nothing) One erev Pesach (admittedly not one I was cooking for) we stopped by the house of my boss to pick up checks… My husband was so mortified and felt debased but I was so grateful, we had only a few dollars in the account!
Tell them firmly and respectfully that you require the overdue payment now. With all due respect You have no money for food (if they’re Jewish say you don’t have a dollar for matzoh) and you want to know if they can have the check ready this afternoon for you to pick up when you come by the office today.
Sometimes you have to admit that you’re desperate in order for people to pay up. It’s not fair but it is what it is. May this embarrassment erase any suffering in your life and be a zechus for you, and know YOU ARE NOT ALONE. You are not stealing money, you’re just waiting for money that is yours to be handed over! Telling someone who owes you money that you need it now might FEEL embarrassing (why? Because you need the money they’re withholding?) but it isn’t really - let them be embarrassed for withholding it. Very often they are in dire straits as well, and it is the squeaky wheel that gets paid unfortunately.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
16
|
|
amother
Wheat
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 4:28 pm
|
This reminds me of a time when I worked as a teacher and did not get paid for weeks until I showed up at payroll office with my eviction notice!!!! All of a sudden they had funds to pay me.
| |
|
| Back to top |
21
0
|
|
amother
Cobalt
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 4:58 pm
OP I know exactly how you feel. I was in your shoes for many years. I was all cleaned and ready to cook but no money for food. I sometimes only had a few dollars in my account.
I waited and waited and a couple of days before Pesach money would come in but by that time either the stores where out of stuff or only the real expensive stuff would be available. Thankfully for the stimulus check this year.
Hashem should watch out for you and send money to you quickly.
| |
|
| Back to top |
7
4
|
SuperWify
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 5:02 pm
|
Op please pm me with your quickpay.
| |
|
| Back to top |
1
6
|
|
amother
OP
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 5:23 pm
So this is the thing. If you knew who I was in real life, you would probably hate me for complaining. We were well off for a short period of time. I have things I can sell. I have jewelry. My husband drives an expensive car. We fell so low and it’s so hard to let go of what we have left from our wealthy days. But technically we can.
So we are selling shares in a privately owned tech company because we need the money now. Half of it will go straight to debt from local people (friends, grocer, butcher, gardener..) and the rest should be enough to buy the basics for the next few months.
It’s no ones fault it’s dragging, it’s just the way it is. The contract was written wrong. There was a typo on our company name. He went out of town. Etc etc.
But I can’t take money from anyone, how can I when I’m wearing diamonds every day?
I wish to one day be wealthy enough to start a fund for people like me, people who are left with too much pride and beautiful possessions but no money in the bank. I would personally know what a mitzvah that would be.
| |
|
| Back to top |
45
11
|
|
amother
Mustard
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 6:10 pm
OP, you can certainly take a free loan without feeling bad. Even if you don't want to accept tzedakah. I may not be wealthy, but I have $1000 that I don't need to spend for another few weeks. I'd be happy for it to be used for Pesach expenses, and then you can return the money when your sale goes through.
May your mazel shine and may you always be in a position to give!
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
16
|
|
amother
Salmon
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 6:17 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | So this is the thing. If you knew who I was in real life, you would probably hate me for complaining. We were well off for a short period of time. I have things I can sell. I have jewelry. My husband drives an expensive car. We fell so low and it’s so hard to let go of what we have left from our wealthy days. But technically we can.
So we are selling shares in a privately owned tech company because we need the money now. Half of it will go straight to debt from local people (friends, grocer, butcher, gardener..) and the rest should be enough to buy the basics for the next few months.
It’s no ones fault it’s dragging, it’s just the way it is. The contract was written wrong. There was a typo on our company name. He went out of town. Etc etc.
But I can’t take money from anyone, how can I when I’m wearing diamonds every day?
I wish to one day be wealthy enough to start a fund for people like me, people who are left with too much pride and beautiful possessions but no money in the bank. I would personally know what a mitzvah that would be. | You are allowed to complain. I’ve been poor my whole life and I don’t want diamonds. I can’t imagine what it’s like to have money and then lose it. I would be happy to help out, either a donation or a loan. Please let us know if you have PayPal. I know a lot of us want to help you make Pesach and keep up your jewelry as well.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
13
|
|
amother
Azure
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 7:19 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | So this is the thing. If you knew who I was in real life, you would probably hate me for complaining. We were well off for a short period of time. I have things I can sell. I have jewelry. My husband drives an expensive car. We fell so low and it’s so hard to let go of what we have left from our wealthy days. But technically we can.
So we are selling shares in a privately owned tech company because we need the money now. Half of it will go straight to debt from local people (friends, grocer, butcher, gardener..) and the rest should be enough to buy the basics for the next few months.
It’s no ones fault it’s dragging, it’s just the way it is. The contract was written wrong. There was a typo on our company name. He went out of town. Etc etc.
But I can’t take money from anyone, how can I when I’m wearing diamonds every day?
I wish to one day be wealthy enough to start a fund for people like me, people who are left with too much pride and beautiful possessions but no money in the bank. I would personally know what a mitzvah that would be. |
If you have that much jewelry, why can’t you sell off one piece? That could get you enough to make pesach. Even pawning until the money comes through.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
4
|
|
amother
Coral
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 7:23 pm
| amother [ Azure ] wrote: | | If you have that much jewelry, why can’t you sell off one piece? That could get you enough to make pesach. Even pawning until the money comes through. |
stop judging. tzedaka is meant exactly for this. so everyone can have according to what they are used to !!! I think it's די לצורכו according to his personal needs. the pride is a real thing. having been on both sides of this ( we drive a Lexus and have jewelry etc but have had times that were beyond difficulty) please accept some of the help offered here.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
18
|
|
amother
Azure
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 7:30 pm
| amother [ Coral ] wrote: | | stop judging. tzedaka is meant exactly for this. so everyone can have according to what they are used to !!! I think it's די לצורכו according to his personal needs. the pride is a real thing. having been on both sides of this ( we drive a Lexus and have jewelry etc but have had times that were beyond difficulty) please accept some of the help offered here. |
Not judging OP’s specific case, I was making a suggestion.
However it’s weird... I always thought tzedakah was for people who needed help and couldn’t do anymore for themselves. Not just people who don’t want to make difficult decisions and part with belongings. If that’s the case, can I just quit my job and take handouts simply because that’s why it’s there?? I’m sure you wouldn’t be okay with that when it’s the gentiles doing it on the govt dole. 
| |
|
| Back to top |
8
5
|
|
amother
Tangerine
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 7:33 pm
| amother [ Azure ] wrote: | Not judging OP’s specific case, I was making a suggestion.
However it’s weird... I always thought tzedakah was for people who needed help and couldn’t do anymore for themselves. Not just people who don’t want to make difficult decisions and part with belongings. If that’s the case, can I just quit my job and take handouts simply because that’s why it’s there?? I’m sure you wouldn’t be okay with that when it’s the gentiles doing it on the govt dole. |
OP is not trying to take tzedaka. She was just venting.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
20
|
|
amother
Coral
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 7:34 pm
| amother [ Azure ] wrote: | Not judging OP’s specific case, I was making a suggestion.
However it’s weird... I always thought tzedakah was for people who needed help and couldn’t do anymore for themselves. Not just people who don’t want to make difficult decisions and part with belongings. If that’s the case, can I just quit my job and take handouts simply because that’s why it’s there?? I’m sure you wouldn’t be okay with that when it’s the gentiles doing it on the govt dole. |
you are judging and being extremely unsympathetic!!!!!
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
19
|
|
amother
Azure
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 7:49 pm
| amother [ Coral ] wrote: | | you are judging and being extremely unsympathetic!!!!! |
It’s hard to be sympathetic when someone has tools at their disposal to change their situation but instead just whines about it. She has been given numerous offers and she doesn’t want to take it. Okay that’s fair. So I suggested that she temporarily pawn something valuable to get the money for Pesach. I don’t understand why that’s unsympathetic.
| |
|
| Back to top |
4
5
|
|
amother
Forestgreen
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 7:57 pm
| amother [ OP ] wrote: | So this is the thing. If you knew who I was in real life, you would probably hate me for complaining. We were well off for a short period of time. I have things I can sell. I have jewelry. My husband drives an expensive car. We fell so low and it’s so hard to let go of what we have left from our wealthy days. But technically we can.
So we are selling shares in a privately owned tech company because we need the money now. Half of it will go straight to debt from local people (friends, grocer, butcher, gardener..) and the rest should be enough to buy the basics for the next few months.
It’s no ones fault it’s dragging, it’s just the way it is. The contract was written wrong. There was a typo on our company name. He went out of town. Etc etc.
But I can’t take money from anyone, how can I when I’m wearing diamonds every day?
I wish to one day be wealthy enough to start a fund for people like me, people who are left with too much pride and beautiful possessions but no money in the bank. I would personally know what a mitzvah that would be. |
You may not realize it but it’s perfectly ok to take tzedaka in your situation, diamonds and all. It’s a halacha in shulchan aruch. If someone is used to a certain standard and falls on hard times it’s appropriate to give them tzadaka even just to allow them to maintain some of the lifestyle they are accustomed to. It’s called “dei machsoro”. Take the tzedaka that is being offered without guilt. It is completely appropriate.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
15
|
|
amother
Lavender
|
Wed, Mar 17 2021, 8:03 pm
| amother [ Azure ] wrote: | Not judging OP’s specific case, I was making a suggestion.
However it’s weird... I always thought tzedakah was for people who needed help and couldn’t do anymore for themselves. Not just people who don’t want to make difficult decisions and part with belongings. If that’s the case, can I just quit my job and take handouts simply because that’s why it’s there?? I’m sure you wouldn’t be okay with that when it’s the gentiles doing it on the govt dole. |
You are really sick. I’m sorry. This is so not nice. You’re jealous
| |
|
| Back to top |
2
15
|
|
Imamother may earn commission when you use our links to make a purchase.
© 2024 Imamother.com - All rights reserved
|  |
 |
|
 |
|
|
