Im so embarrassed of my nose

writinggirl

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 10:39 am

amother DarkOrange wrote:

And what if DDs do the surgery further down the line and OP regrets not having done it...

So she can do it then! I think doing it now is giving a message to her daughters.

amother

Floralwhite

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 11:03 am

DS had a nose that he inherited along with an injury that made it very crooked-and he had a severely deviated septum. He went to see a specialist who was both an ENT and a plastic surgeon. He recommended to do both at the same time, both for cost-effectiveness and simultaneous recovery. We spoke with a Rov and he said if we were even considering plastic surgery this was the time to do it. The doctor did an excellent job, and most people didn't even realize he had it done. It looks very natural and fits his face. It really just looks like a straightened version of his original nose. FYI, if you are going to a reputable plastic surgeon, they should be able to fix it so it still is in the general genre as your original nose and have the tools to show you what it will look like when they are done via computer generated images. It really boosted my son's self-confidence and iyh when it comes time for shidduchim he will not feel like this is holding him back. He did it bein hazmanim and he was fully healed before he needed to go back into public. He's inspired my husband to do the same surgery for his septum and nose Smile

amother

Caramel

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 11:05 am

D o it! So tell your kids you needed to fix a deviated septum. Just do it!!

Many people won't notice , they just will realize something is slightly different. And nobody cares, but you will feel more confident and enjoy it so much.

What are you waiting for? Go pick up the phone and make an appointment.

amother

Honeydew

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 11:31 am

so you are self conscious of your nose now, but you will also be self conscious of your nose job, with people knowing you got one. So I say do it, because in your 40s you’ve clearly still never come to terms with your nose and wish you can change it.

The feelings you have after your surgery with everyone knowing will make you feel self conscious, but after a while people will move on. Nobody is like “I can’t believe she got a nose job!” Ten years later. It may be an initial shock to some, but it will pass eventually

LovesHashem

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 11:56 am

amother Stonewash wrote:

I also really dislike my nose.

Is there a halachic issue with a purely cosmetic surgery? I always thought there was.

I learned if it's something that actually severely affecting ones mental health it's allowed because it's for mental health.

amother

Impatiens

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 12:00 pm

My husband needed a surfer ice a deviated septum so he did a nose job as well. It’s really natural and he looks great. You definitely can’t tell.

My MIL has it done 35 years ago and the style then was horrible. It’s super rounded and funny looking she wants to do it over now…

amother

Winterberry

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 3:27 pm

I am in favor of you doing what you need to do to feel better about yourself but you should really ask yourself first if you might regret it. There are a few famous people that have large noses and then had a nose job and their entire character was gone. I don't know if you are familiar with Jennifer Gray from Dirty Dancing she was adorable her nose was a huge part of her character then she changed it and yes she's still cute but lost her uniqueness. Think about what it would look like if Barbra Streisand had changed her nose, she would just not look the same, there's something about her nose that's endearing. Is there any way you can find to embrace this part of you? If not, then go ahead and be honest with your daughters that all along it has bothered you about yourself but you still think that they are beautiful

amother

Jean

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 4:10 pm

amother Amaranthus wrote:

Just be aware that according to Chinese medicine, changing the shape of your nose changes the mazel and personality of a person. For example if the tip of the nose is very low like pointing downwards, if means the person has a great sense of business. If the nose is very big and substantial it means that this person will be very successful in their 40's. If the bridge of the nose is extremely narrow then it means not so much energy. If the bridge of the nose is curved upwards (not sure how to explain) then it means the person is a trail blazer.. certain parts of the nose mean that the person will be rich. Certain parts means they will have lots of energy. A crooked nose means a crooked back, so according to them it's worth to fix that.

If not for the Chinese medicine I'd definitely say go for it. Do what's right for you. Think 5 years ahead. People will talk for three weeks and then move onto the next gossip. And you will be happy for the rest of you life.

I don’t think that most of us live our lives in accordance with Chinese medicine

synthy

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 5:30 pm

I know someone who had a terribly crooked, humongous nose. She got a nose job done and her siblings that didn’t know didn’t even realize it at first! It takes a while for the swelling to go down and the shape to settle so its not immediately obvious.

Cheiny

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 5:56 pm

amother Oldlace wrote:

I just got a nose job. I'm a few years younger than you but I work in a job where alot of people know me and see me around once a year. 95 percent of people including my own extended family members who I don't see often, and my neighbors who I didn't tell and don't see over the winter, didn't even realize. And my nose looks completely different than it was, not a minimal change.

How do you know they didn’t notice? Maybe they’re just tactful enough not to comment.

synthy

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 5:59 pm

Cheiny wrote:

How do you know they didn’t notice? Maybe they’re just tactful enough not to comment.

They were at a family gathering and only one person asked if she hurt her nose. They literally did not notice until told.

amother

Forestgreen

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 8:18 pm

amother OP wrote:

Would you think it’s weird if you saw a 40+ year old woman get a nose job? Always had a terrible nose but was too self conscious and poor to do it. We finally have some extra money now but I’m so embarrassed already for all the stares, comments, talking behind my back…….makes me want to not do it. I guess I’m not confident enough but I really want it. My friends all do Botox and have had mommy work done but this is so public

Can you tell me more about the mommy work done? I'm interested

amother

Snow

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 9:28 pm

amother OP wrote:

What’s mommy work?

amother

DarkOrange

Tue, Jun 06 2023, 11:56 pm

writinggirl wrote:

So she can do it then! I think doing it now is giving a message to her daughters.

OP gets one life - she'll be waiting years to look the way she wants to.