I am an INFJ/enneagram 4 AMA

giftedmom

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 8:38 pm

amother OP wrote:

What about careers? I’ve done marketing for a very long time but I don’t have any interest in it as I find there is so much greed and dishonesty in the field.

Still- whenever I think of working on becoming a therapist because I feel so strongly for and actually get humans, I get cold feet because I cannot stand toxic people. I have plenty of compassion for them but cannot stand them all at the same time.

Thoughts?

This is why being a SAHM works for me🤷🏽‍♀️ I’m not very good at making money. I’ll sometimes have pieces published but I do it on my own time and trying to write for others on a deadline stresses me out. I also tried marketing and I was very good at it but yeah I didn’t like it much either. And being a therapist, yeah I’d be good at, but it would drain me. I also avoid toxic people like the plague, to the point of being outright borderline mean and snobby.

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 8:41 pm

giftedmom wrote:

Right there’s just a constant conflict and I guess I know what I myself experience but am skeptical when it comes to other people’s claims. Especially bold claims like being able to heal.

Of course. Part of being a frum Jew is constant skepticism.
There is a reason we are encouraged to say the ani maamins daily.

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 8:45 pm

giftedmom wrote:

I can’t be a sahm bec I divorced a highly abusive guy a few short years ago and need to support my children financially. I would love to. I won’t ever be bored. I have 850 hobbies and I would be busy with all of them literally.

Talk about existential questions! I did learn a lot about priorities through my experience though and now is not the time 2 be building my hobbies/living my ideally dreamed up life. I would yes though gladly go into more debt (I have lots of it thanx to financial abuse) in order to help my kids become the best happiest humans possible.

So yeh I pursue my interests the best way I can.

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 8:50 pm

giftedmom wrote:

And regarding toxic people- yes man.
I think that the ones that are openly toxic should be shown the door. You don’t get to harm others and then get extra kindness- oh no you don’t eye roll!

I keep them at arms length.

Amother energy healer can you explain what happens to my energy when I am near toxic people?

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 9:21 pm

daagahminayin wrote:

Could be it’s all confirmation bias.

Hmmm not sure of that.

It did ask me to put in marital status to which if I recall correctly I put in divorce. Part of my reading result was that I divorced someone who understood me very well but was too immature to appreciate me and soon I will meet someone who will yes appreciate me for my qualities. Super interesting because the first part is true.

I wonder though if the part where I wrote that I am divorced got me that past and future partner thing.
Dunno.
Was weird.

amother

DarkKhaki

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 9:38 pm

amother OP wrote:

Regarding which types you love and don’t love, I love every number as long as they are self aware which is kinda rare.
I love the sparkle of the 7, the drive of the 3, the groundedness of the 5, the stability and trustworthiness of the 1, the calm of the 9, the fresh energy of the 8, the idealism and calm of the 2.

Can’t help but notice that there’s nothing you love about the 6! Lol
Signed, a very self aware and also very self hating 6

amother

Blush

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 9:49 pm

amother OP wrote:

You wrote up above that you have a strong pattern of first loving and then getting frustrated with the 4’s.
2 speculative reasons may be:
1 - they are unhealthy 4’s who rant about everything and jump to conclusions as a result of their emotionality.
2 - because although you appreciate being understood by another empath and the 4 brings dazzle into your life, you hate their way of taking action because you are a 9 and you lack that ability.

Regarding which types you love and don’t love, I love every number as long as they are self aware which is kinda rare.
I love the sparkle of the 7, the drive of the 3, the groundedness of the 5, the stability and trustworthiness of the 1, the calm of the 9, the fresh energy of the 8, the idealism and calm of the 2.

Hey thanks for answering
I think my love hate with 4s is that they are usually emotional, spiritual, and genuine. Exploring them is so exciting, like the thrill of the chase. but then it's too much for me. A lot of the unhealthy 4s are depressed or obsessive about really deep subjects and I feel what they are feeling and I can't tolerate it. In general I am an empathetic and I think im a two. I desperately want to help everyone, heal everyone, I'm in this idealistic quest to ease the burdens of the world. I day dream frequently and many times the theme is of helping people in different ways. So all this is very draining for me and the flip side of my personality is silly and childish, free spirited and unencumbered by social pressures, anything is possible and I just jump right in. I'm always trying to balance the two or lean more towards the lighter side of my personality.
I'm actually not 100 percent sure of my letters and numbers. Ive been trying to figure it out for many years, I think I need someone irl to help

I find it funny that you said you like all the numbers and then left out 6. I'm rolling LOL

poor 6

giftedmom

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 9:52 pm

amother OP wrote:

Then I’d advise you to close your eyes and go into marketing. For as long as you need. It’ll get your creative juices flowing and keep you afloat financially.

daagahminayin

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 9:56 pm

amother OP wrote:

I was being tongue-in-cheek - the skeptical side of my INFJ personality coming out!

IYH you will meet the right person at the right time soon!!!

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 10:23 pm

amother Blush wrote:

poor 6

Yeh totally not fair to the six. Weird of me!

Regarding what you wrote above, is it possible that is where your healing lies? Accepting that you are ok even if you have nobody to heal…? That is for sure true for 2’s.

Unhealthy 4’s can be draining…we all need boundaries. Yup!

amother

Thu, Oct 05 2023, 10:25 pm

giftedmom wrote:

Forsure deadpan
And it takes a lot to actually get me to laugh

I actually laugh a lot out loud between myself and the walls around me. I haven’t found that many good friends so I decided to enjoy my own company.

I’ll purposely laugh out loud about something and then do an eye roll in the mirror.
Try it. It’s good for us!