12 mo wakes up twice a night

amother

Sun, Sep 07 2014, 7:38 pm

I am at a breaking point. I can't function anymore. I know he CAN sleep through the night because it's happened twice, but that's not what's happening usually. I tried having dh go in, but he gives up after like 3 minutes and hands him over to nurse. I tried CIO but he ended up waking himself up further as well as waking up his sibling. If I try to cuddle and rock him without nursing, he frantically claws at my chest. He does not take a pacifier. I'm getting desperate here!

amother

Sun, Sep 07 2014, 7:53 pm

HE falls back asleep, but I don't. I can't bring him into our bed, then I can't sleep. He also drives me nuts in day time. He's been walking for 3 months already and can run and climb and can't be alone for a second. Changing his diaper is a struggle as if he were 6 months older than he is. He shrieks if I leave his sight. I NEED my nights back. My older child wasn't like this, and frankly, I feel like I love my big one more right now...

MaBelleVie

Sun, Sep 07 2014, 8:25 pm

For the sleeping, I found that the only way to night wean was either to wean during the daytime or to have my husband take over all night wakings. He would soothe the baby but obviously not nurse.

For the rest, different kids have different temperaments. The sooner you embrace them for who they are, difficult or quirky or whatever, the sooner you will start to enjoy them. I know it isn't always easy, but that's parenting for you.

Odelyah

Sun, Sep 07 2014, 8:49 pm

amother wrote:

Why can't you sleep if you bring him into your bed? Does he kick you in his sleep?

working hard

Sun, Sep 07 2014, 8:57 pm

I had that with my 15 month old twins until last week!! I did not want to hear of CIO and still do not. I tried a couple of gentle methods like cutting minutes from the feeding, soothing without it, only feeding once. Finally, I just went cold turkey. One night when they woke up, I came in with cups of soy milk (they are allergic to milk) and I offered them the milk. I told them only soy milk now several times and was determined not to budge. The first night took almost 2 hours until they took the soy milk and went back to sleep. The next night took 10 minutes. Now, a week later, one slept through and the other was up once for about 2 minutes.

Can you try offering a substitute?

Hatzlacha Rabba

Mommastuff

Sun, Sep 07 2014, 10:37 pm

Odelyah wrote:

Why can't you sleep if you bring him into your bed? Does he kick you in his sleep?

I have the same issues as OP and I can't either sleep with my baby in bed with me. He tosses and turns (I'd find his foot in my face or he rolls over on to my head) and I always sleep on alert with him nearby (sleeping with one eye open) so I don't get a good, deep sleep.

I tried offering a water cup in the middle of the night if he wakes, and that sometimes pacifies him.

Sometimes I'm so tired in the night that I just nurse him to get some sleep. I know that's very bad for consistency so it's self defeating, but how do you not sleep for nights on end and still have patience for CIO??!!

busydev

Sun, Sep 07 2014, 11:25 pm

I have 2 kids that have very different stories

1. At 1 year (his birthday to be exact) he was nursing every 3 hours at night. I decided to stop cold turkey. I gave him his paci and rocked him back to sleep and kept him with me in bed. When he started hitting my chest, he was passed to DH who held him and gave him his pacifier until 7am. The next day he ate a lot more solids then he had till then. On the third night he slept thru. He continued to nurse in the daytime until 17mo (when I was 3 mo pregnant)

2. Randomly at 11.5 mo he slept thru the night a couple times. Then one night he didnt and I realized that he had eaten supper a little earlier and not as much as the other 2 nights. Now I just make sure that he has alot of food in the last couple hours before bed (supper, plus a yogurt, plus extra bread etc plus a good nurse) and he sleeps pretty much thru the night (wakes up between 5:30-7) I am finally feeling rested again (he turns 12mo tomorrow)! He still nurses during the day and eats plenty of food.

So I would up the solids that he takes during the day esp carbs and protiens and esp in the evening. And if that doesnt work then get your DH involved. It may mean a few hard nights, but then bliss....

ETA before I decided cold turkey with DS1 I was debating doing a slower method- where every night you nurse for 1-2 minutes less till you get to 0 minutes and then comfort etc till he sleeps thru (lets say usual nirsing session is 10 min, then cut it to 8 the second night, 6 the third night, 4 the fourth night etc)

amother

Mon, Sep 08 2014, 3:49 am

You are creating a viscous cycle by nursing him when he wakes up. By 12 months he should not be hungry in the middle of the night. Chances are he is only waking up because you've trained him to do so by feeding him when he does and he's gotten used to it. Does he wake up around the same time every night? Does he eat a lot or does he eat a little and fall back asleep? If he is eating a lot and waking up at different times then maybe he is in fact hungry in which case you have to up his feedings during the day.

pickle321

Mon, Sep 08 2014, 3:50 am

amother wrote:

Was accidentally amother