I call him Mr. Sensory....

israelgirl

Sun, Jan 11 2015, 7:20 pm

My 3 year old, (though it has not been officially diagnosed) seems to have a sensory problem. I believe he doesn't feel as he should, as opposed to hyper, I believe? Don't know the terms. Anyway.
He is always chewing on something, spinning around in circles, rocking back and forth, he'll have 103 fever and wont complain at all, bang his head into the floor and laugh, I cant toilet train him FOR THE LIFE OF ME, he'll be wet and not have a clue its so cute. Like I'll tell him, "_______ do you feel wet like you had an accident?" and he'll just say no I'm not wet Mommy! (cutie....) I've totally given up in that area. He screams a lot when he is with his friends and will act silly more then playing a constructive game. He's unbelievably thorough and intelligent though and extremely thought out and popular (so to speak for a 3 year old - lol) He listens beautifully but until I get his attention it takes time bec he gets so involved in whatever he is doing. Does this sound like a sensory problem? (He's not autistic at all, nor PDD we had him tested by a top neurologist who basically said hes fine just a bit quirky and may benefit from some OT)
1) What are your thoughts on the importance of getting him therapy if it doesn't seem to really be affecting his life all tha tmuch, other then the toilet training problem?

2) What's throwing me off are two things: a) that he is a very calm natured child not very raaaaa and all over the place. Just when he gets hyper and has fun it seems to me more riled up then regular. b) don't know if anyone can shed some light on this, but the behavior patterns seem to come in stages. Like he'll be totally fine and I start thinking maybe I'm imagining the whole sensory thing, and then something snaps for like a week or two and he starts acting babyish and stimming a TON. That's the most confusing part for me. Anyone have a child like I'm describing?
Love him though Smile

His sister is the polar opposite-the definition of a text book child. As my mother puts it, each child has his quirks, as did you, just enjoy them Smile

FranticFrummie

Sun, Jan 11 2015, 7:30 pm

Some kids are sensory seeking, and some are sensory avoidant. My DD is a weird mixture of both.

Your son will probably always be sensory seeking (or what's called "under-responsive"). Learn to channel that by giving him lots of ways to get those needs met. A heavy weighted blanket will help him settle down better at night. He can also wrap himself up in it to apply extra pressure, or carry it around the house for extra weight in his arms.

Give him heavy things to carry, shove across the floor (like a full laundry basket), try to wear him out. See if he likes spicy foods! Some sensory kids who are otherwise picky eaters will go crazy for ginger, chilies and wasabi.

The main things is, don't try to make him less sensory seeking. He won't change, he'll just get the impression that you think he's "bad" or misbehaving. He's hard wired this way, to giving him a constructive outlet will help build his self esteem, and eventually he'll learn how to meet his own sensory needs.

Potty training is going to take you a while longer, and relying on sensory cues is not going to be the way to get through to him. Try appealing to him on a more intellectual level, like getting him to want to wear big boy underpants like his daddy does. That may motivate him to pay more attention to his body.

Websites the sell toys for Autistic children will have tons of great sensory things that have been tested and are safe, like stuff to chew on, heavy blankets, and games to fidget with.

israelgirl

Sun, Jan 11 2015, 7:47 pm

THis is so good to know! I'm happy to have him "shlep" stuff and now I understand why he loves doing it (always insists on helping me carry home the HEAVIEST grocery bag and I always feel awful about it.) What other ways are there to do therapy , so to speak, at home? Also, he can hold an ice cube in his hand for liteally 10 minutes, play with snow with no gloves, and no complaints. I always find myself saying, your are going to hurt yourself! Should I just leave him be and let him be himself?

FranticFrummie

Sun, Jan 11 2015, 8:55 pm

spreadthelove:) wrote:

Just leave him alone. He's telling you what he needs! I let my 3yo walk in the snow in her bare feet. People said I was a horrible mother, but guess what? She's 11 now, and still loves to walk in the snow barefoot. She never "gets sick from the cold". She also loves to walk in the rain without a hood or umbrella, because she likes the patter of the rain on her head. Cold doesn't make people sick, low immune systems and germs make people sick.

In good weather, let him dig deep holes, carry rocks, pull weeds, and otherwise do some "landscaping". There are small trampolines with nets around them that will fit easily in the house. Put a mattress on the floor and let him jump all day long, or teach him how to do somersaults. Let him pile up sofa cushions and crash into them.

One thing that DD loves is to be tickled really HARD, and even pinched. I taught her to say "enough!" when she needs to catch her breath, or wants to stop. That puts her in control of the game, so the tickling never feels "mean". A good half hour of tickle attack calms her down for hours afterward. We always have tickle fights between candle lighting and kiddush so that she will sit nicely at the table for dinner. Otherwise she's fidgety and drives us all crazy. It really does her a world of good, and when she's feeling really in need of an energy release she'll beg for it.

Do not be surprised if your son has trouble sitting through school. He may never be the type to sit and seriously learn for hours on end. There's no shame in being a construction worker - someone has to build houses! He can always do like millions of other Jewish men do, and learn while on break, after work, or take an early morning shiur.

FranticFrummie

Sun, Jan 11 2015, 8:59 pm

I have to share this story.

When DD was about 2 1/2, she did something deliberately naughty, and I have her a potch on the rear. She turned around and looked at me like "What the heck was that?" shock

About a week later she did something else naughty, and I got really mad and said "Do you want to get another potch?" She turned around, stuck her little tush at me, and said "OK, but not quite so hard this time!"

LOL

I started laughing so hard that I totally forgot what I was so mad about. That was the moment that I realized that potching was NOT going to work on her, because she is so sensory seeking. The worst punishment I could possibly do to her, is to take AWAY something that gives her sensory input.

Kids are funny creatures. Wink

imasinger

Sun, Jan 11 2015, 9:16 pm

I love FF's stories, and think there is a wealth of information and wisdom in her posts. You might find it helpful to read more about SPD.

For the potty training, maybe you should work on what is called "timed elimination." Basically, you remind him every hour or so to go into the bathroom and try to produce. Don't work as much on getting him to realize what "wet" feels like. Just praise him for being dry, and remind hm to go. Some kids need this support even past kindergarten. Eventually, they learn.

seeker

Sun, Jan 11 2015, 10:21 pm

I didn't read all of FF's replies and probably don't have any advice nearly as good as hers, because she seems to have come much farther on this journey than I... but just to respond to your two bullet points:
1) Yes I think early therapy is important. From what I've seen it only goes downhill if you don't. It might not bother him, but he will be at a disadvantage later if he has never had any intervention before and suddenly the behaviors become a problem in school.
2) Yes there are certainly ups and downs. I think there must be some other factors triggering this but I'm not wise enough to have it figured out yet...

MaBelleVie

Mon, Jan 12 2015, 12:36 am

Definitely read a book or two on sensory processing, it will be extremely enlightening and help you understand your child much better. Try "The out of sync child."

Just to add- regarding safety, since he has poor awareness of pain, you will have to teach him to use his other senses or general knowledge to protect himself (which is what pain is supposed to help us do). Especially when dealing with anything heat related.

FranticFrummie

Mon, Jan 12 2015, 2:41 am

Dolly Welsh wrote:

Just to repeat, FF said in a previous thread that while all autistic children are sensory, not all sensory children are autistic. That was news to me and very interesting. FF really knows her stuff.

FF, maybe post some links to websites that sell toys specifically for sensory children.

Just Google "autism sensory toys" and you'll find a ton of useful information. I've gotten some great stuff for DD.

I've found by far that the best deals on heavy blankets is on Etsy. Find a seller that will custom make them in your child's favorite patterns, colors, and materials (soft and fuzzy, or smooth cotton). You'll pay the same amount or LESS than you will on the other websites. Give them about a month to finish your order, it's totally worth it.

The heavy blanket was a miracle for DD. She falls asleep faster, sleeps through the night more often, and barely sleepwalks at all these days. I have one for myself, because it helps soothe me when I'm overtired, and works wonders for my panic attacks. The weight lowers your blood pressure and calms your nerves.

cbsp

Tue, Jan 13 2015, 11:44 am

Dolly Welsh wrote:

FF, maybe post some links to websites that sell toys specifically for sensory children.

I'm not FF, but here's a link:
https://funandfunction.com
They've got some great ideas and toys.

My daughter's OT wrote this book:
http://www.imamother.com/forum.....70218
She's got a website/blog that's a wonderful resource as well.

I made heavy/weighted blankets for my children. These are better instructions than the ones I followed (it's a pdf file):

https://www.google.com/url?sa=.....n40OA

(I wish I would have known about using the stuffing to hold the pellets in place!) The pellets can be pricy because you want to make the blanket 10% of the child's weight plus a pound. I used 50% off coupons at Michaels to make it more reasonable... it's a time consuming but not difficult project. I also made the blanket itself out of an old sheet and then made a quilt cover out of flannel. The kids don't always use the quilt cover, depends on the season.

Hatzlachah!