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Forum
-> Parenting our children
mra01385
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Sat, Sep 26 2015, 11:38 pm
I was wondering how often your children get to Interact/ spend time with dh.
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Rutabaga
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Sun, Sep 27 2015, 2:26 am
Maybe you should make a poll. You might get more responses.
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MiracleMama
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Sun, Sep 27 2015, 8:54 am
Every day. We're a family. We all live here. How could it be otherwise?
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littleprincess
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Sun, Sep 27 2015, 9:00 am
Of course. All the time. We have games that either him or me play with kids. He sometimes takes out a child to eat or all of them. Takes them to park a lot of times when I wanna do things around the house
He always takes them with him erev shabbes to do the shopping
And right now he's building up a new toy with them
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morah
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Sun, Sep 27 2015, 9:04 am
MiracleMama wrote: | Every day. We're a family. We all live here. How could it be otherwise? |
How could it be otherwise? When the husband has a crazy corporate job, or is a medical resident, or has a job with busy seasons, a job requiring lots of travel, or when he has to work two jobs to make ends meet. There are many, many dads who are "Shabbat Abbas", it's unfortunate, but not unusual at all.
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MiracleMama
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Sun, Sep 27 2015, 9:12 am
morah wrote: | How could it be otherwise? When the husband has a crazy corporate job, or is a medical resident, or has a job with busy seasons, a job requiring lots of travel, or when he has to work two jobs to make ends meet. There are many, many dads who are "Shabbat Abbas", it's unfortunate, but not unusual at all. |
You're right. I hadn't really thought of it because even in the families I know where the husbands work crazy hours they seem to arrange their schedules either to start extremely early to be home by dinner, or work late but around at minimum in the mornings to eat breakfast with their kids and see them off to school. But I guess for some it might be beyond their control.
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morah
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Sun, Sep 27 2015, 9:21 am
MiracleMama wrote: | You're right. I hadn't really thought of it because even in the families I know where the husbands work crazy hours they seem to arrange their schedules either to start extremely early to be home by dinner, or work late but around at minimum in the mornings to eat breakfast with their kids and see them off to school. But I guess for some it might be beyond their control. |
Happens to be mine does just that. He is up with them in the morning and eats breakfast with them but is rarely home for dinner or bedtime during the week. My dad was a resident when I was a young kid and I saw very little of him during those years, he sometimes had to be away even on Shabbos. I have siblings still in school and while my dad certainly has a difficult and taxing schedule, he has some amount of control having been in private practice for twenty years, so they see a lot more of him than I did when I was that age.
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amother
Red
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Sun, Sep 27 2015, 9:27 am
its also a personality thing- my dh is b"H good with kids, I've come to realize that other people's husband's get more overwhelmed easier...
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LiLIsraeli
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Sun, Sep 27 2015, 9:49 am
MiracleMama wrote: | You're right. I hadn't really thought of it because even in the families I know where the husbands work crazy hours they seem to arrange their schedules either to start extremely early to be home by dinner, or work late but around at minimum in the mornings to eat breakfast with their kids and see them off to school. But I guess for some it might be beyond their control. |
My husband works long hours, and he commutes as well. He usually leaves before the kids get up and returns after they are sleeping. He spends a few hours with them on Shabbos and Sundays.
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Ema of 5
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Sun, Sep 27 2015, 12:45 pm
MiracleMama wrote: | Every day. We're a family. We all live here. How could it be otherwise? |
my children dont interact with their father every day. he leaves to shul before they go to school, and he comes home from work after they are already sleeping. it sux, but it puts food on the table, clothes on our backs, and a roof over our heads.....
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shabbatiscoming
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Mon, Sep 28 2015, 3:54 pm
Every day. Most mornings my husband walks our daughter to the bus and he gets home from work about an hour before she goes to bed and they get to hang out or we eat dinner together then.
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amother
Lime
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Tue, Sep 29 2015, 11:29 pm
MiracleMama wrote: | Every day. We're a family. We all live here. How could it be otherwise? |
Lucky you. My dh was recently forced to go into business for himself. he works 18 hours a day minimum,and we can go for days not seeing each other at all because he might get in 3 hours before I get up to go to work. Shabbos is the only thing holding us together as a family at this point. G-d willing this is only temporary till his business gets off the ground, but just because you have a nice family life you shouldn't make remarks like "how could it be otherwise?" I just told you one way that it could and I know there are amothers who could give you other examples.
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chani8
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Wed, Sep 30 2015, 2:00 am
What matters most is how much time the wife and husband get to spend together.
As long as the main caregiver is fine and managing ok, the kids will be fine.
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amazingmommy
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Wed, Sep 30 2015, 2:09 am
chani8 wrote: | What matters most is how much time the wife and husband get to spend together.
As long as the main caregiver is fine and managing ok, the kids will be fine. |
I think kids need present parents!
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chani8
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Wed, Sep 30 2015, 3:02 am
amazingmommy wrote: | I think kids need present parents! |
I'm not into guilt-tripping parents who need to work full time to care for their family's financial needs.
Quality not quantity. Every parent should take time to be present with their children.
When we are with our kids, it's good to give them around 10 minutes an hour of undivided attention.
And of course, when they come to chat, stop what you are doing and pay attention.
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mra01385
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Wed, Sep 30 2015, 9:13 pm
Thanks for all your replies. Now I'm feeling better knowing that my husband is among many breadwinners that makes time to spend with the kids when he can (more so on shabbos and yt) despite the fact that he works long hours and has a long commute to/from work every day. I also til recently was stahm for my 2 young children. I now work a few hours in one of the local yeshivas in my neighborhood.
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