Your community | Imamother

Seraph

Wed, May 16 2007, 3:48 am

How do you feel about your community? Like it? Hate it? Neither?

I loooooooooooooooove my community. At first I disliked it here because its not the warmest communities- there aren't so many social functions or ways to meet people, so it took me a good few months to meet anyone here. But since then, slowly, slowly I've been meeting more and more people, and each person I meet is nicer than the next. I haven't met anyone here that I don't like.
And when I mentioned to people that I'm new, they get very upset that they haven't met me yet, and then make it their goal to involve me in as many community events as possible, inviting me over for different things, introducing me to other people, and really making me feel accepted.
Its so amazing how your perception of a place can change 100%. I love where I live- its really amazing!

B'h I feel this way- it makes me more encouraged to want to stay here for good.
I didn't really like the community I grew up in, and then moved to a different community where people were great but not my type, and finally found a place with people my type and so warm and freindly and loving. Thank you Hashem!!!!

Ruchel

Wed, May 16 2007, 8:39 am

Like

- Consistorial ("plain" Orthodox)

-people don't judge you, despite a few (not mean) yentas

-some people see me as a role model shock

-people are there when you need it, be it bris, baby naming Very Happy

, yahrzeit...

-community very active for a small one, there is even a community newspaper!!! (although the quality is not high)

-many traditional people, some secular, but no reform (wanting to take away the mechitza or mixed praying or women in tallis you know what I mean) and people are respectful despite some showing up on Kippur with decolletes and perfume and make up LOL

Dislike

-small (minyan only on saturday morning, in summer fri night too and of course holidays) BUT I shouldn't complain because it is considered big for outside of a city.

-not so many frum families and being among the 2 or 3 frummest ones, not inspiring, being the only woman who covers her hair all the time and long sleeves blah blah blah...even worse for dh

-few Ashkenazim, only 1 other Ashk frum family, Sefardi rite...

-no mikve, no kosher shops, no Jewish school, small shul... but impossible to ask outside of the biggest cities, and with G-d's help maybe a school will begin here or in a close community and they are building a bigger shul.

-my pet peeve, the French habit to kiss people of the other gender on the cheek, even the frum. NOT ME, thanks!!

-no married girl under 30 or so

-converts generally left out, it's cruel

-Talmud Torah for the kids/ bar and bas mitzva lessons don't seem really serious, although the Consistoire accepts them so they must be ok...

AS A WHOLE, GOOD.

hila

Wed, May 16 2007, 9:02 am

Quote:

my pet peeve, the French habit to kiss people of the other gender on the cheek, even the frum. NOT ME, thanks!!

I used to work for Kodak UK, and constantly talked to Kodak Paris office. I once had to actually go there .
I met the first guy - and he took my hand and he kissed me on both cheeks, before I knew what was happening. I was a single frum girl, used to a proper British office.
I spent teh day avoiding meeting more people and witha flame red face !

BH here in Israel most people know a frum woman will not shake hands - let alone kiss.

And I usually get out of it by a sort of flippant remark like "dont take this personally but frummies dont touch anyone other than their husbands" - somehow it sounds funnier in hebrew.

Make aliya Ruchel ?

mumoo

Wed, May 16 2007, 9:07 am

Chicagoland (includes Skokie, Lincolnwood, several neighborhood 'parks' and even outskirts up to 40 miles away) is large enough to have many schools, stores, kollels, restaurants, mikvehs etc.

It's also small enogh that there is not a tremendous segregation between different groups. Mixed hashkafos daven togather, their children play together, go to schools together, share simchas together. (there can be yesivish, modern and Lubavitch in one camp carpool; I was in one like that)

The chesed here is unparalleled. There are dozens of gemachim. The Chicago Cheed Fund has a huge building that houses 7 gemachim in one place; I call it the ge'mall) People here are really nice. If people fight, it's about who can host the out-of-towner! I grew up here, mine and dh's families are here and I can't see ever going somewhere else to live.

GramaNewYork

Wed, May 16 2007, 9:42 am

I love my community for its achdus, chesed, kiruv, warmth and being down to earth and modest. Until I can get to Israel which is where we really want to be (even though I'm aware that we'll be giving up many of these things), I am happy here.

I've lived in a few communities and I love this one the best.

amother

Thu, May 17 2007, 1:31 am

mumoo wrote:

This is very strange. We lived in Chicago for awhile, and did NOT have that experience.

amother

Thu, May 17 2007, 9:44 am

I HATE my community. IYH soon we will be moving.
I hate how everyone looks at you if you are not exactly dressed how everyone else is dressed.
I hate how ppl feel that if you are not dressed to their standards of tzniut they can put you down.
I hate how not having children makes us not really one of the crowd and ppl are obviuos about it.

bashinda

Thu, May 17 2007, 10:10 am

Likes

Crown Heights Can Tziva Hashem es haBracha

People really come out en masse and want to do chessed and were amazing when I had my triplets and there's room for me to also do chessed and give back

Chinuch is great here

Dislikes

I'm not a New Yorker. I'm from California. It's hard living here when you're used to suburbia. It's gashmius but there you are.

The way people treat each other here in stores the general NY attitude takes some getting used to.