8yo counts too much

amother

Ruby

Thu, Dec 10 2015, 2:21 am

My 8yo DD is obsessed with numbers and counting and time. When she was little, she wanted to give numbers to colors instead of learn their actual names. (History of serious mental illness runs in the family, including OCD, Bipolar) Do you think these are indications of a problem?

I try to direct her to do other things, instead of watch the second-hand on the clock waiting for her turn on the computer, but I end up having to take the clock away to get her to stop.

amother

Blush

Thu, Dec 10 2015, 5:47 am

I also have a daughter obsessed with numbers (counting, finding patterns, and so on). At your daughter's age, she would fiddle with a calculator for ages, memorizing patterns of numbers. She also associates certain colors with numbers (a form of synesthesia).

While she is a quirky, unusual person, and we do have a family history of mental illness, she appears to be healthy. These issues are not necessarily indicators of a problem. However, if your child is exhibiting behaviors that worry you, trust your instinct and diiscuss your concerns with your pediatrician.

FranticFrummie

Thu, Dec 10 2015, 6:49 am

The difference between a behavior and a disorder, is to what degree does it distress the person who is doing it.

I count slices when I chop vegetables, and I count stairs, but it doesn't bother me. It's just a quirk. If I truly believed that NOT counting would bring bad luck to my family, then it would be a disorder.

DD is obsessed with time. It was the worst when she couldn't tell time, and couldn't add or subtract to figure out "how much longer" and "what time is it now". She would get really upset if I didn't answer her, even if it had just been 30 seconds earlier. I thought I was going to lose my mind. She's gotten "better", but only because she's 12, and can do the calculations for herself. She still insists that things be done "to the minute", and gets really upset if anything gets delayed, or if someone shows up early.

I don't believe that having a diagnosis of OCD, Autism, Aspergers, etc. will be very helpful, unless it gets you better access to a therapist who knows how to channel obsessive thoughts. You can't really "cure" an obsession, and distraction often makes it worse, so a good therapist will be very useful.

amother

Blush

Thu, Dec 10 2015, 9:43 am

FranticFrummie wrote:

This such a good explanation.

gp2.0

Thu, Dec 10 2015, 10:31 am

Abnormal behavior only qualifies as a disorder if it significantly impacts her ability to live her life normally. In your example with the clock, if she's choosing to watch the clock instead of play, that's her choice. As long as she plays other times and doesn't spend ALL her play time every day watching a clock, that's ok. If she decided that she can't go to school because she has to watch the clock for the next 10 minutes instead of catching her bus, that's a problem.

If she likes to count her steps from one street corner to the next, that's not a problem, but if she keeps going back to the first corner because she lost count or because a step was wrong and every step has to be counted right and she'll do it over and over until it's right, that's a problem.

FranticFrummie

Thu, Dec 10 2015, 2:30 pm

amother wrote:

My 8yo DD is obsessed with numbers and counting and time. When she was little, she wanted to give numbers to colors instead of learn their actual names.

This reminds me of a friend of mine, who's Autistic son memorized the entire Pantone color chart. If you are familiar with Pantone, it is the fashion industry standard of color organization, and each color and shade has it's own number. Your DD might enjoy that.

The GOOD thing about obsessions, is that you can use them to your advantage. It sounds to me like she will never struggle with math, so you're lucky there. Is she a good reader? Maybe you can find her books with stories about famous mathematicians, or something like that. Setting the table means counting the places, and figuring how many forks, knives, etc. will be needed. Start thinking about things in terms of numbers, and see how many applications you can come up with that your DD will find interesting.