Hosting guests & ur child has severe allergies

amother

Scarlet

Thu, Feb 11 2016, 11:18 pm

Can someone help me?
My 18 month old is severely allergic to nuts.
We are hosting guests for someone's simcha this shabbos. I asked the hostess if she can please ask her guests not to eat nuts in our home.
There are nuts in the hostess box. She said take them out and put in something else.
Which I don't feel completely comfortable doing. And they could have nuts on them, I ised to take them along when traveling. They are adults and can be asked not to eat it in my home.

I will do my best to be here when they arrive because it was made clear they will otherwise not get the message. And I wrote up a note to leave in their room saying, one of our children is severely allergic....
How do you normally handle this?
Thanks!

Miri7

Thu, Feb 11 2016, 11:22 pm

Remove the nuts from the hostess box. Don't think twice about it. You can give them to them upon their departure if you're concerned about taking the nuts.

The last thing the guests want to do is cause your sweet child to have an allergic reaction. Can you get their contact info and call them before arrival? If not, be sure to leave a note if you aren't there when they arrive! Trust me - they want to know this so they can take precautions.

Going without nuts for a weekend is no big deal.

anonymrs

Thu, Feb 11 2016, 11:24 pm

I have children who are severely allergic. I would ask to speak to speak to the guests by phone before and let them know. I would mention it when they come. Additionally, I would leave a tray of candy/cookies with a nice note welcoming them to my home with a small reminder at the bottom about the nuts. Too bad if this is bad manners but my kids' safety comes first. If I can't do this, then I can't share my home with others.

imamothertoo

Thu, Feb 11 2016, 11:32 pm

Personally I find this rude. If u r hosting someone else's guest and u specified about the nuts, she had the obligation to make a different hostess package that didn't put ur child at risk. When that didn't happen, (maybe it was an oversight) she should apologize and offer to pick it up and drop off another pkg. it's not ur job to start replacing items in her hostess pkg.
I don't allow food in the bedrooms in my home. If I'm hosting someone's guests I will tell the guests upon arrival that I really prefer no eating in the bedrooms. They r more than welcome to come up for cake or food or drinks whenever they like. If they listen, they listen. If not , I can't help it.
When I am asked to host guests two months before pesach and on , I tell the Baal simcha that the room was already cleaned for pesach and I can really only help them out if they take that obligation on themselves to let their guests know and to not send chometz items in their hostess pkg.
So u ask how others would handle this..... When asked to help host someone else's guest you should definitely respond that due to severe allergic child you can only help out with hosting for her if she makes sure not to put any nuts or wtvr the allergy is in the hostess box and she should be responsible for notifying her guests beforehand of the same. And definitely repeat that to the guest when they arrive.

FranticFrummie

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 2:57 am

I would wrap the whole package in plastic, and either throw it away or give it to another family. Maybe donate it to your local homeless person or food bank. I'd be so worried about airborne oils, or accidentally getting nut oils on any of the other foods and then spreading the oils on your hands to household surfaces!

I hate wasting food, but I don't mess around with allergies.