HUSBAND AT BEDTIME

amother

Turquoise

Wed, Aug 10 2016, 2:54 pm

If my husband is at home during bedtime then he is lying on his bed watching youtube videos and NOT helping. Even if I am at wit's end. Don't think this is a modern invention - in the past the men would just read the newspaper, and before newspapers were invented they would just be doing something else. My husband is every bit as bad as all of the other husbands that don't help etc. That's just his personality.

The problem is that I am not so good at bedtime either. So the kids go to bed a drop later than their peers. If they are in bed with lights out at 9 pm then I am pleasantly surprised. It's a shame because I'm sure they could use more sleep. I am going to try to work on it some more this year but eventually they will all grow up and determine their own bedtimes.

amother

Babypink

Wed, Aug 10 2016, 9:12 pm

amother wrote:

Yes. Your dh should work with you for at least some of that time.

Don't know how to double quote, but this comment was in response to my earlier post. My husband helps with homework, serving dinner, and getting the younger kids in bed. My question wasn't aimed at myself, rather j was asking the amothers who are having a hard time with bedtime why bedtime specifically is hard--on the rare night that dh isn't home to help, homework and serving dinner (my kids are slow, picky eaters) are the hardest parts. I was just curious how others handle.

amother

Lime

Wed, Aug 10 2016, 11:30 pm

I don't totally agree with the SAHM having to do the bedtime part.
A SAHM mom is many times pregnant, or going on little hours of sleep due to breastfeeding an infant through the night, or post partum or other hormonal related issue.

I'm not talking about husbands rearranging their schedule. I'm talking about husbands who are home at bedtime. Yes, I know they worked all day, but you know what? So did the SAHM. And most people can tell you that being a SAHM to a toddler and infant is many times much harder!!! So just as he needs a break so does she. And while the man is usually in the same physical state, the SAHM mom might be in her early pregnancy (morning sickness is nighttime too for many) or in her 3rd trimester, where lifting kids into and out of baths and beds is impossible, and/or might be exhausted from being up night after night with a newborn or breastfeeding baby while her husband got his 6 or 7 consecutive hours of sleep.

It's not so clear cut.

By the way, I work part time and my husband is not home for bedtime many nights. I still don't think SAHM need to work morning hours, evening hours and night hours because just because they don't go to work out of the house.