Spinoff of "Classroom Vent" The Teacher Version...

amother

Orchid

Thu, Dec 29 2016, 10:36 am

I'm a teacher that loves her students-every single one of them is a valued member of our room. I am passionate about what I do and teach with a full heart, big smile and lots of differentiating for all learning styles.

I do NOT do this for the Chanukah gifts.
I teach because I have a passion for working with all children.

My favorite gifts this year... a truly hideous necklace- loud, garish, feathers and all which the child handpicked for me from all the lovely accessories at Macy's. I wore it for two days straight despite strange looks from random people at stores and while running errands- I happily shared that this was a holiday gift from a student handpicked especially for me- everyone smiled!

My other favorite gift- after sharing with my students how I nearly burned down our apartment complex as a newlywed attempting to make potato latkes I NEVER made them again... One mommy sent in four homemade potato latkes- the gesture made me ALL of us laugh periodically throughout the day.

My room parents apologized profusely because they had collected several hundred dollars for our team of teachers but the Head of School got wind of it and respectfully asked that all monies be returned to the respective parents. Why? Because the PTA gives a $100 check to every school employee.
I shared that I appreciated the thoughtful gesture but some families have several children and it creates a financial hardship and uncomfortable feelings in our parent body. The room mothers said they had intended on putting the names of all the children on the card but the HOS was very firm about the monies being returned.

As a teacher I am fine with it- I do not teach because once a year I receive some gifts. I teach because I truly love working with children and watching them grow and flourish and mature during our ten months together.

However, some teachers really appreciate and enjoy the group Chanukah gift from the children.

IF parents are happy about contributing why would the HOS enforce his policy?
If nobody is made to feel uncomfortable and everyone is cheerfully included what is the BIG deal?
Initially I was fine with the new policy but after reading the lengthy "Classroom Vent" thread I wasn't so sure on how I felt.

Simply curious to hear how other teachers (and parents) feel about this.
(edit: I misspelled straight... typos are my other passion :-)

watergirl

Thu, Dec 29 2016, 11:12 am

amother wrote:

I keep re-reading the end of your post, and I went back to the thread you referenced - am I missing something? That thread is mainly women complaining about pitching in and feeling pressured. So you were fine with the policy that they aren't allowed to collect for a classroom gift - but now after reading the thread, you aren't so sure if you are fine anymore? What am I missing here? Many parents give to the gift because they feel they must. Names wont be included on the card. Pushy phone calls.

What is the BIG deal, as you asked? Well, you are using inclusive terms, and you really shouldn't. How do you know how EVERY parent feels in your class? You want to assume that EVERYONE participated out of love for you. I'm sure that you are a beloved teacher - but maybe the collection is out of budget for a parent? Maybe someone is not giving cheerfully? Maybe a few parents DO feel uncomfortable? How can you claim to know otherwise? How did the Head of School find out about this? Maybe a parent or two, who is in the PTA and knows that you all get $100 from the school complained?

By the way, I've also been on the bad end of a class mom call. I kept pushing her off out of embarrassment. She called at least 6 times. Finally she said "are you giving or not" and I said no, and told her how she made me feel.

I've also been the class mom making the calls! I call each parent 1 time, and say its a suggested amount. Leave it there.

I taught at a school where the PTA gave us each the same monetary chanukah gift. No phone calls made. No collections. Some parents gave us (in addition to the PTA gift) token mugs, gift cards, etc. Most didn't. I was also a teacher at a few schools with out this system and I have to tell you, as a parent who struggled to pay into the pot - I had a hard time with these gifts. I know that some dont give with a full heart, and I dont want to accept a gift like that. But I just got the cash, not individual checks and cards. And names were left off the card - I send hand written thank you notes to the whole class - to each child/parent, so the parents who didn't contribute wouldn't know that their names were left off. Let them save face and think that I thought that they contributed. But for the parents who gave, and couldn't afford it - that's the worst.

Can you clarify your stance?